The Off-Air Show - 'Getting Free Stuff From Companies' - Ep.47

00:00:00
Speaker 1: Elvis Durrand presents Just the Off Air Show Scary Jones and Greg t Look forty seven, Why are you holding your head because I'm such a headache. That's just starting the show with screaming like that is making my head hurt even more. I thought it would be cathartic for you. Yeah, you know, it's the opposite. You know, when you've got that massive migraine and you really can't scream. When you do, it just hurts and it has to go away. Now it's finally going away. We should retire to the screaming part of the show. You the next part of what we do. No way, that's pretty much the reason why people listen. You're gonna have to wrap a bandage around your head, look out and deal with it. Spells right now, Oh my god, I can't get rid of that. We are on episode forty seven. I'm Scary along with Greg TA and the ball freak Ronnie. Yeah. You know, I'm just reflecting on the day's events yesterday. Yeah, I was thinking about the spelling bee that we had. Yeah, and I gotta say I really should have thrown it at the end. I shouldn't have come in first place and tie your nephew because he's a kid, that's right. And you also shouldn't have called him bitch, because I think you when he yelled at and he goes, how about that bitch. If you haven't checked out episode forty six, please do. It was the Greg T spelling b I was actually up against Greg T and uh bald Freak's nephew, little nephew, Baby Anthony. I felt like I was stealing candy from a baby, trying to compete on his level. I feel like this is what they do in Little League, right with the parents as they stand along the sidelines and they want to like they're fighting for their kids, but they're really fighting for themselves. I would just like to reiterate that you guys set me up for the fall. You did Ronnie, you held it. It was great. I loved the game, but you guys, somebody was in his ear. He couldn't spell the lamb to be or whatever the the budget for that sort of trick the podcast, So Baby Anthony and I tied for first place. I thought it was a good sign of sportsmanship that you that you instead of going further down the road, maybe just wanted to cut the podcast short because that's kind of your m O. But yeah, but I feel like I should have thrown it at the end because he's a kid. I don't want it's a quarter mine. It was the honesty of the podcast that made it what it was. Don't you agree to No, I do not. I don't. I didn't feel good about it. I felt stupid about it. And I also didn't like that you guys fixed it on me, and that also somebody was, you know, talking to him and it was in his ear. Well speaking of honestly, I want there's one correction. You did spell psychiatry wrong. I heard I misheard you because I was trying to hit a timer. I actually only spelled one word right words yeah, when one for five think I think you got the first grade word right. I got it right. No, you didn't. You didn't include an A in there. You spelled it psychiatry. Roll the tape back. I don't have to roll the tape. Our phone number is one four two year, one hundred. It's the off air show, and thank you for calling. You heard our tweet and now you're here. What's your name? Hey? What's Ryan? Where you from? Wisconsin? Madison? Very nice? Do you feel that you should throw it for the kids. It's like you're in competition with a kid. Should you let the kid win and have that fall? What? You throw it for the kids? You know, as part of the great spelling me yesterday I competed with him neck and neck right up to the very end. And I don't know, man, I just feel like now after the fact, I should have let the kids. We feel guilty. You feel dirty. He feels dirty, but you feel dirty. You know, you wanted to grow up in the school of hard knocks and say, look, knock life sometimes kids. First of all, what's going on in Wisconsin today? No much? Just relax and listen to you guys. Damn no, actually no, it's not around by what's your name though, buddy? Ryan? Ryan? Nice? Ryan? What do you do for a living right now? I'm still looking for a job. It's still out there. So what did you Ryan? What did you do today to get yourself that job? What did you do today? Ryan? H not much. I don't I don't have a job. So yeah, but Ryan, how do you expect to get the job if you don't do something to get that job? I don't know. Well, Ryan, thank you so much for calling you appreciate that. Thank you very much. Show Scary Greg, team the ball freak Ronnie, and your name is Jason from Man. Yeah, it's that. It's the Square State. What part? Oh? Right below bend? Yeah, that's where I like and I like it right there, taking me right there right the bends? Jay, how's the Ducks gonna do this year? How the Oregon Duck's gonna do? Ducks are going to kick as they do every year? Hey, let me ask you something. Is there anybody in college football that's got a cooler uniform than the Oregon Ducks? That dark green now that I've seen freaking green and yellow. Oh, but I'm a Raiders fan. If it goes to NFL. Okay, that's not a character. How do you get all the way down to Oakland from from below the Bend? Well, they've been leading in penalties this long, at least they've led in something consistently. What are you doing today, Jay? What are you doing today? Your agenda? Give us your schedule. I'm actually sitting waiting for my landscape crew to get to work here, and i'd call in and see how you guys are doing today. Well, what do you do for a living. I'm a landscaper. Oh, so you have a whole crew. Is it your company or do you work for somebody? I work for Springtime Landscape and Arrogation. I'm a foreman for me, So you don't really have to lift a finger. You're the foreman. You just tell everybody I noticed that the foreman they do the least work. Is that true? Is that true or not? With your compani I like to use the word lead because I lead by example. If you can't keep up with me, you have no place on my crew man. He's the boss. Now do you want Do you trim hedge? Did you trim hedges? Do you do like fancy shapes? I? Yeah, I do any shape you can want me to, as long as the bush is thick enough. If if you and Edward scissor Hands went into a head to head bushing bush trimming competition, who would win? Oh, he'd win hands down. He has no hands. Now have you had sua hands? Have you had situations where they were fighting neighbors regarding property lines and whose trees over the other, like sagging over and and were you ever caught in the middle of that? Almost every construction job I've ever done. I've had to hassle with the neighbors. Your favorite story on that built a about ten dollar water feature and the neighbor was complaining that one of the boulders stuck over the property line. But how much? But like six inches? Oh yeah, I'd say six inches maybe eight at top? Did you have to shave it down? Like? How did you rectify that problem? Rectify it had the six inch problem? You know? Owner of that rock with a sledgehammer and love. My question is how often you get to hook up with some of the wives that are at home while their husbands are away at work. I've been asked by one woman to come up and check the plants on her balcony while she was in her miniskirt with Yeah, there you go, Jay, Thanks j for calling you off air show bro. We appreciate what excites you guys. Yes, still double on palms. I'm a fan of passion. Take Yes, it's a passion. I like this. You're a fan of this. I love this song. It's not a bottle, it's not a new song. Now after this song, we're will do some of my new business old business nice and then maybe we'll talk about our fifty episode coming up with me. You have to do a party. You're feeling that. I'll bet a show doesn't take to make good. Now, how many is do combine? That's it's just a flame? Oh yeah, so many years long. I'll stay till the gates stay. Yeah, there's this passion pit lifted up on the off air show Scary Jones, Gregg t and of course the bald freak Ronnie. Yeah, it was a good year. Was it a good year for you? N Where were you? I think so? I think, I think. I think My uncle had an trans am and I thought it was pretty cool that he had t tops and we would drive around and listen to like music from like Hey Mickey by whoever? Hey Mickey remember that something? Hey Mickey Tony Basil. Yeah, man, actually that was really close enough. I equated to that. I don't know. I was in the fifth grade and it was a bad year except for the fact that I was the lead in don Quixote, the play. I was don Quixote. Don Quixote, Yeah, what was that even about? I don't even know what it's about. It was a guy who would fight invisible wind wind mills. He was crazy in his own head said he would walk around with his sidekick Sancho Panza. Really yeah, he was to dream the impossible Dream? Is that that a song? Dream, the impossible Dream, Dream the impossible? Give me that song, Give me that song in our computer. There's no way. It sounds so old and uh he did? I am I don quote the Lord? Oh my god. Okay, you don't want what does mean to you, bald freak. I'm a big fan of the eighties new wave, like Tears for Fears. Everybody wants to rule the world driving around Scaries BMW with the top down. I don't have a BMW, dude, I had a tricycle going down to Mont talk on Scaries Trisickle, Dude, I hear this song. You know what. I couldn't get past this guy's voice. He was like, he sang from like the Lord cockles of his body. Shout, shout. He still he's still doing it. Kurt Smith and Roland. In fact, they're gonna be performing at our festival. That's right. I love them. They're so great. I'm so glad to performing. I'm so glad you're not looking forward to the performance. Let's listen to that weight right now. Listen right, Yeah, this whole album is amazing. Show all out, come on, come on, compete, well, they will be on stage. I heard Rating Music Festival. We'll give it a plug. It's in Las Vegas. Come on the program. When I think of the eighties, dude, I think of like I think of like, you know, hey, Mickey Tony Basil, Like that was the that was the eighties. Were just talking about that, but it really was though transcended the eighties. Tools of Love. Hey, the Drunken Pirate, The Drunken Pirate is about to drop anchor. Yeah, we need some old business and new time. We don't any rememberies to buy cassette tapes, basic coming in like a cardboard wrapping, cardboard wrapping, horrible coming cardboard horrible? Who puts a cassette tape and cardboard dumped into a new and old business? Come on, they're making pirate Captain wants to hear some business. Business business, business business, Captain business, the business capaxpaw business. He called me captain. Wax Sparrow. You didn't wax sparrow. You saw like the pirate guy on Jake and the Netherlands Pirates. Yeah, my daughter watches on Disney Yard. That's actually like, um a not a secret dream of mine. I would love to be a voice on a cartoon. You know what that would be. That's kind of right up my alley. Okay, yeah, I'm glad you you know what we could do. You know there's a uh an animated company in Connecticut. Yeah, no, no, there the Blue Sky. Blue Sky is the animated company. They do like ice Age and they do Thocht other movies. We should ask them. I asked them on Instagram. They didn't respond. I would love to get a tour of their studios, the Blue Sky studios my resume, Yeah exactly. They animate. They call you, they're looking for voices. Pirate captain. Why don't we get somebody on the air. It's pretty good rate, captain. Listen, I'm gonna shot it down, all right. That's new business like that. I think we all have cartoon voices their captain walk. I'm gonna try to get your team to be working on your pirate jargon. I think. So let's move along here. We have to talk about you're moving along again our business. Yeah, we're going back in time. Well, it's a new business. Business. We're gonna start with old business. Go I want we're supposed to have. We want to bring the mac well and people up on the podcast Toro and let's let's let's talk. Let's have an organic conversation about how we can make this a win win for everyone involved. You guys are okay with us, and I'll let them scold you about not buying the products. Okay, I'm actually wearing right now, No way, yeah, Look, I got my my mac Weldon's on and they are quite by the way quite. I have three pairs of mac Weldon's at home. Did you buy those? Um? I got them complimentary. I have a blue and a red and a black pair. I do, okay, and look at the color. So i'mwhere right now? I too, am wearing mac weldon underwear. I put them on today, totally unplanned. Look at that. Okay, what's going on? Discussing? What's going on underneath? You have a boner? Pull your pants up? Why don't you like to see mack Weldon see how excited? Great? That's really excitential. Sponsor Grete is visually excited, way too excited for so okay, So alright, great, Matt Weldon's coming up here. You give me I'm too sexy, give me sex here because I want to know why that box of potato chips is in here. Because I get to that three bags. Haven't even figured out whether a mac Weldon's business. He's coming up. We got that check all right, next, Okay. A lot of times when you when when a company does something wrong, right, you're quick to complain, as I was. So I love to go to this deli down the street, Mike's Deli, and I get myself a great sandwich, and I always get a bag of potato chips. I get Deep River potato chips, sea salt and vinegar. Right, those are my favorite brad. They're good, right, aren't these grap But those are quality, quality brands, and that's them. Are organic, they're healthy, good for you ingredients, so not a whole lot of chemicals. But at the bottom of my bag was a clump At the bottom my bad was like a clump of crap, right of crap. I didn't know what it was. It was black, and it was hard and it was crusty, and I didn't know what it was. So what did you do? Took a picture, put it on Instagram, and I send it to Deep River snacks. Do you know? Within an hour they responded to my Instagram. They wanted to, you know, make the whole, the whole problem go away. They explained to me that in some of their bags they have a lot of seasoning and it gainst clump up and that's all it was, was like a hard ball of seasoning. So they turned around and within three days they set me a whole entire case of all of their potato chips. So Deep River share the wealth. Bro music for Deep River Scary, the Deep River Deep. You got no Deep River music, Deep River wider than a mile. Drop me a beat, drop your beat, beat, give me a beach. Come on, ron, go go go. You're ready annoying, You're being annoying. But okay, So anyway, Deep River Snacks Deep they're not paying for this time. We got we got nacho cheese, Nacho nacho cheese. We've got more. We've got all kinds of got sweet Maui onion, we have mesquite barbecue. Knew there were so many spectacular flavors in the Deep River Box Special Edition Ninja Ginger Ginger. So here's here's the thing. And I I've noticed this too. Was marrying Olive Oil complaining about companies. I've I've tried to do this, and not on purpose. I actually had a problem at Target once, and it was because I had a cart full of groceries. They went to go check me out, then their computer system reset. They had had to put everything back in the cart, and they had to re check me out again. Then it had to do it a third time because it reset again. After three tries. I left the car to groceries there and I walked out. I made a complaint, a rational complaint to the store. Management actually took Target corporate and they gave me a one hundred dollar gift card to spend a Target for my troubles because it took me an hour to check out my whole grocery car, and they understood where I was coming from. So they made good on that the same way they found a black You found that black clump of stuff underneath that in that bag. Deep River made good. That's right. Great companies do amazing things. I agree in the people pleasing business stay too. So what about you, bald freaked? Have you ever had a situation where um, one of these companies made good on something that usually just take medicine. When something bad you can't stand for no no. See that's the only time. The only time something happened like that was I went to go see Late Night with David Letterman with my mom. And we've all been to the late night shows, um here and there. They couldn't see us together. So my mom sent an eloquent letter to the producers of Late Night with David Letterman on NBC and they sent me an awesome Late Night with David Letterman T shirt, which I still have today. I was a little kid. Howard Stern was on ron Would of the Rolling Stones, and I had to sit away from my mom. My mom wrote the letter and they gave me a T shirt. I thought that was kind of cool. That was great. They ain't no boxing potated chip. But far too many people are you like you bold freak when you have so many other complaints and then you don't respond to do anything. That's not true because people do have the they should like time, because companies, especially good companies, great organizations, they will respond and they will make good and you'll get free stuff out of you. You've been You've been privy to some of my situations. I don't want to mention the companies because it's not I don't have anything good to say about that. I know where I've I've made those same attempts and they have not done well, but done well because of the way you have to complete to the compliments sandwich. Have you about the compliments you start with you starting it? Do you start with the bread, which is, oh my god, I'm such a fan of your product. I'm in the middle telling you what the compliments sandwich, sandwich, sandwich music. You guys are so interruptive, and you guys have a d D. Listen to what I'm saying. And then you put the turd in the middle compliment sandwich that the turd is, the complaint is the negative experience you had with the products you love. And then the last piece is the bread at the bottom, which is a positive again thing. But I look forward in the future to seeing, you know, maybe you could do something right by me, or maybe I'll try it again. The compliments sandwich, you're eating a turd between two pieces of positive tard, between two pieces of positive brand. Where's my chips? By the way, when you just started playing that that that dong play it again? You like that you play that you want to play a dog? Does that sounds like a big man? No, it sounds like yeah, like a C d C. You just call that a dog a d C. Have one little note can inspire great? Want a whole different song that's a little lower Right there already comes, Yeah, it gets great with it's so awesome? Wait, where's how after? How many dogs coming? I think it's coming in after the four? Totally I'm trying. I'm trying to get with the sandwich. Do no? I like that? I like that analogy compliments sandwich with the turd and sound. So you the listeners can actually make their own complaints. Ships. Don't stand idly by make that complaint, but say how much you love their product, and they will give you free stuff right come your way, all right, I gonna try it. Also New and Old Business. We have episode fifty coming up. It's a good hit here on Tuesday, because Scary is not going to be You're on Thursday, so there's old There will not be an off air show because Scar is not gonna be or does it mean I don't want to we do without him? If you can't just do the two of us without him, we need the crusty iron uncle, crust crusts. We need the yellow We used the sulker. Well you you sulk too. Yeah, but a podcast without me, this place would be out of control. You wouldn't be able to do tell me something I don't want to hear. We have a good time. It was the longest intro in history of rock and roll. You know what Great Tea said yesterday, the miser away the cat will play right exact. That's what he's going to say in the world. So I think you're the mice. Hold on, see about the saying hold on here, un down, cricket up, scared, get cricket up, cricket up, trouble, here's blowing off car speaker. Yeah yeah, horse coming episode coming up? Say you did the math on that. I don't trust your math. Notice today's forty six. Then to Mark, I'm sorry, tastes forty seven to Mary, and then we're not doing Thursday Monday what I'm saying? So why don't we do something special? Can we have a guest on? Yeah, I think it's time to get right. So why don't we get your guy Weener on the phone? You have Marissa Tomy here again? Give me, who's guy feedy, that's what he scary talked to Guy Fi Scary guys not coming on the show? Feed How about Gavin? Right, we don't want you, We don't we don't want to, don't want to be I opened for Gavin once. It's once upon a time? Remember that? Okay, can we get a guest on? Can we get a guest on the episode? Want to have a guest just for the sake of a guest? Shouldn't have relevance to our fiftieth episode. Shouldn't be somebody who kind of has meant something to us along the way on our musical journey. Who has meant something to us music? It's kind of difficulty. Could be back for McDaniels, I mean the Beast of Boys. Yeah, okay, let me tell you something. I would dedicate an hour to have Adam us that that would be at Rock King Ed Rock or Michael Diamond. Unfortunately, God rest his soul, Adami out m c A passed away a few years ago. Well, why don't we try to reach out to one of these guys? Did you love them so much? Why don't get one of the Beast boys get mixed Master Mike who's part of their crew to do a mix. Why don't we ask him? Can we? What is the harm with reaching out to one of these guys and the Beastie boys and just seen it to even call in? Right, what's the harm? Who's the guest? Who's the guest book or on the show? Scary Jones, alright, Scary I deferred to Greg t He was supposed to bring up Florida Georgia line yesterday. You know he said no to them. He said no to Florida Georgia line. He's done nothing, dude, He got sur ivan. He give me, can you give me a song by Florida Georgia line? On, give me Florida Sorge line. I'd rather give you. Give me that next, give me Florida Georgia line. Come on, man, we could still do Marissa Tomy. I would love to do it, dude. We have to do it under the guys of something New. The whole idea was that she was supposed to give Scary Jones advice about giving a speech. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah. So can we make up a story that Scary's got to give another speech? Yeah? Ran down? All right, okay, come on, give me the remix when he loves he did the remix with the wrap with the rapid part of it is in there, It's in there. Yeah, give me that getting to that uncle. Yes, So yesterday he could have gotten us Florida Georgia line and Scary said no, so we don't want Florida Georgia line on. Well. I I appreciate that he finally showed some temperance and he didn't just say yes to something like we're talking about Florida Georgia line. I want to say something yes, yes for the sake of it? Yeah? Or you kidding me? Meet somebody who who fits the fabric of this podcast. You think Florida Georgia line fits? Well? Are you even? But we can't even get an absolutely can't get anybody beyond the show. All we had surviving don't make fun? When do we go to his party? Are we supposed to go to his party? We can't? We have to we have to plan it wasn't that the whole idea? Isn't that party? When is we are gonna be on the show? Can you get Winer on the show? Right? Our our mutual friends Gary and mutual friend Lauren Weiner is our connection potential connection to Marissa. Right, do you want me to get him on the phone tomorrow? Well, I don't know if you want him tomorrow. Can't we talk to him off fair and see if he can book her? And cut right to the change. Did you want to talk about leg wrestling with him and why how he grew up with the name Lauren we I want to. I want to leg wrestle with him, with Lauren Weiner. They could be entertaining. I'm just saying you want you want a third leg wrestle with Lauren we I think I like I want to. I want to wrestle with him. You want off off fare, you want to do it off Fair? You tell me what you want to do, you guys, I am your humble servant. You know, school is back in session in parts of the country, and we don't know where our listeners are listening. You know what, maybe nobody who's going to school is listening to this podcast. Yeah, but no, they might want to know what it's like that could be known as the weener in school and get picked on. I mean it's got to be roughly kid. You still put us solicited out to the listeners to call him that's a good topic for tomorrow. Buddy with the last name we are got picked on. So anybody has some sort of weird aim growing up, like how did how did you deal with it? We gotta have some people out there who will drop us the line at dot com treat this like a radio program. You know, mine was Dumbo back in the third grade, but I never told anybody that. Yeah, well I was in eighth grade. Yeah, but I remember that because we knew each other in the eighth grade. But you didn't know me in the third grade when I had huge, giant ears that pointed out. I used to actually go home and tape tape my ears to my head. Yes, I did, and hope they would grow normal. It's unbelievable, that's true. I swear to God you taped your ears, yes, because they used to call me dumb because my ears used to stick out in the third masking tape. Yes, sit with my with masking tape my ears. Where's that? I want to do it right now? I want to tape my ears. No, but I feel like it worked over time. It's like like braces. Maybe your head just grew like you know, your ears, So do you know how braces work for your teeth, and they moved, they shift them properly, of course. All right, So the same thing with the taping of the ears to the head. I loused. Did you do it for for like every day, for like my entire third grade? And then eventually while you were at school? Look at my ears now, the proper don't stick out. I think it's because beautiful tape. Oh my god, that's so sad. But not while you were at school, like, did you have the tape on your ears? Only when I went home. I used to go home, eat my cookies and milk, and then I used to tape my ears to my head. Nothing's changed, my Seriously. Tomorrow, I'm gonna bring in monster tape. You know. The monster's real heavy duty. It's such permanent. Yeah, And I'm gonna I'm gonna tape my ears to my head. I want to see what that's like. Tomorrow, I'm taking my ears, all right, So alright, that's so tomorrow, anybody out there, tape your ears. I hope you would grow properly over time this topic. Tomorrow, I will tape my ears to my head. You have to show me. Are you gonna show me? Tomorrow show you how he did. I'm gonna bring in Monster Grip tape all right and can't wait tomorrow you're showing when it's like, all right, we'll get Lauren ween Aro on the front two and we need a good guest for episode fifty yes, and mac Well will be able, so we're not going to be going on all right, we'll see that piece out of everybody. Wait, that's a different choir. Swats mean now it's just I guess swats now, I guess it's just wat