#9: Porsches and Scallions and Rants Oh My!

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Speaker 1: Isn't that what those that box was? Yeah, I got it. But he's letting me know. He's like, hey, yeah, chipped, while you doing that scary and Brodie, dot up, that's wrong, not even paying attention, but dot up, they making noise? Not making noise up. Episode nine. That's okay. I told you how to get an email ready for the show. Yeah, you're looking down, you're looking at your phone. Yeah, that's right. That'll do one of my rants tonight. What is the email that you're looking for? That's that's one of my rants. I got you got. Yeah, we've gotta lot to talk about. We really do, so nine to the Brooklyn Boy's kind of excited. We're almost attend This is really cool. We're getting some traction. Thanks for all your feedback, by the way, on Twitter and uh and and twitter because we don't have Instagram or Facebook launched. Although I want to send a shout out to some people that listen to the Brooklyn Boys podcast. Yeah please do wait, not specifically because it's a lot of them, but I shouted them out on Walkers and Talkers. A few of you said you don't watch The Walking Dead or if you're the walking Dead a preacher. But you enjoy uh my stick so much that you listen to the other podcast and you have no idea what I'm talking about. So thank you for listening to that podcast. I shouted you out. But wait, wait a second. So there there are people that are listening to the world like Sierra, and she doesn't she could give a rat's ass about The Walking Dead. Technically, she couldn't give a rat's ask. She couldn't give a rat's ass about the Walking Dead podcast but the show. But she's listening to the podt Walkers and Talkers podcast. How do you do that? I should, I can't. I can't go into a special interest podcast if I'm not following what the podcast is supposed to be about. Here's what I'll say. Do you do a podcast with me? You seem to enjoy me occasionally I love you like eighteen years. So if you see a comedian you like, he could be talking about marriage and you're not married. He's doing a funny bit about kids. Ray Romanos do in a whole segment about kids and diapers, and but you're laughing. True, you don't have to understand the material to know it's funny. So there are people who think that what Jamie, my co host, and I do on the Walkers and Talkers podcast is entertaining enough that they don't need to watch the show. Well, if you're considering doing that and you're listening to this podcast, that's cool and all. But it's sort of like, make sure, make sure the priority is this first post. I'm double dipping. It's sort of like Stevie Wonder. If you talk to Stevie Wonder about how beautiful the sunrise is, he has no idea, but he's interested. He's learning about the sunrise. Plus, like this podcast, Jamie and I go off on tangents. We talk about my trip to Disney and my other Today I complained your a game for this podcast. I've got a lot of game not to worry. In fact, speaking of speaking of a game, I had a list of rants prepared for today. Um on Thursday we record. So last Thursday we did the show. Well, we did it last Tuesday. Tuesday, we did it early, right, which is what my problem is. We did it last Tuesday, so by Thursday I already had new rants. I had a four day fight with my satellite dish provider. Are we going back into this you know, I'm gonna save that because because it's my life. Since that four day fight with that satellite provider, which I won, by the way, not only got money, refunded, an upgrade, a discount of my service. I got everything. But other things have happened since then. I've got other rants. All right, that's perfect. We'll get to know. That's like a week and a half. So you used to have a weekend and a half an unused jokes. Well, I didn't know what was gonna happen at work. Was gonna happen at work, so I want to that's my big rant of the week. Um, we'll talk about that, but I wanted to talk about you. You You had some good news. I had some great news actually right here on this podcast and the other podcast that we do, and even the Big Show. I think it was mentioned, Um, you mentioned that ranting. I was not ranting. You were upset. I disappointed. I was disappointed, but well, the happy part of it is I was excited that Jimmy Fallon follows me, right, he follows me as well. Yeah, he follows you and I both on Twitter. So Bethany put the challenge out there for me and said why don't you d M him? Did you have such great friends with him? And see t V d ms you're back? So you and me, by the way, it was, okay, you want to correct my grammar to that's what we do here, we do by the way, I said, I mean exactly who's wait? You? Me? You every time? So I I said, you know, I'm gonna reach out to Jimmy Fallon on his birthday. Perfect. I'm gonna watch him a happy birthday in his d M. I spltol into his d M. So I wrote to him and I said, hey, there, Jimmy, I wrote, I'll tell you exactly what I wrote. I said, good morning, Bud. Just wanted to wish you efy birthday. And even though I'm up, I'm up to do our show at the ass crack of dawn, I still DVR every episode of the Tonight Show. Thanks for blowing the dust off of late night TV. That's what I That's what I wrote to Jimmy Fallon. And then by the way, you always story, but I want to boy, And then other days goes by, and another one, and then finally he didn't. He didn't respond, and I told all you guys, I'm like, yeah, you're right, he follows me. I follow him on Twitter. I slid into his d M. I tried to him Happy Birthday. He didn't respond. Well, then I decided to follow up my d M. I said, well, maybe he was having an off day or maybe he was busy that day. I'm going to follow up my d M to him with a second DM just in case. Hashtag clingy. Well no, I made it funny. Hashtag funny because I wrote and the follow up should I have written that in the form of a thank you note? As you know, thank you notes is a segment he does on his show. So I kind of made a little joke about, you know, because you didn't answer me back, your bastard. It's a little pessive aggressive though, And what does he do Jimmys Podcast episode nine, Well, you know what that was? Right? What was that? Now? He does that at the end. That's a quest though, right, quest quest Love always save that for next week when we do the episode ten podcast. Quest Love on the drums always says what episode number it is in the show seven something? But I had to play that there because Jimmy Fallon wrote back to me on Twitter and he wrote, well, you could have written it as a thank you note, but I understood it and thank you at three eleven p M. On the twenty one September. Uh oh, just a half hour after I sent him the second d M and uh three days when he realized you weren't going away until he got a response. Well, that's not clingy, that's just me being a little persistent. The end result was his in turn wrote you back, get out of here that. I need to believe that Jimmy right. I believe Jimmy reads his own absolutely, that's his own personally right, the same way Elvis Durant responds back on his own personal one on Elvis Durant, right, and nobody ever responds back for him. It's his cat's himp on Elvis duran show. I mean, you might get one of us or it's always what Nope, in turns never touched our social media. Also, the interns never touched the text messaging, so people might go to do some intern So yeah, so there you go. So you know, the Jimmy Fallon show like the Tonight show, I would say, maybe that's not him, but he absolutely wrote me back. So that was a little update for you. That's an update. Yeah, you want updates. I don't want No, I don't want this update. I want the update. The listeners want it. It is June. Were recording this September, Si, si ee. I'm thinking of I'm thinking of how long it's been so since let's say yes, September twelve, early September. I want to say so, we're looking at five years and a couple of weeks. Now. You have avowed me a steak dinner for something that I did for you on a bunch of people on the show. Took the bullet October seventeenth of this year. Mark my words. Today's September twenty eight, October seventeen. I'm gonna give you that. Make nineteen days from him give you a steak dinner. It's gonna be a dinner time. I gotta be honest. I almost don't want it. I like the jingle, so no, no, you're gonna have to retire the jingle after the stake dinner because we'll have to update that. I just had one like I after just played. Afterwards, we'll play the jingle. I'll give an update that but I'm not buying it. Stall you're claiming on the seventeenth. We may be going out to dinner. All right, we'll see even get it done, we'll let you know. Okay, So I've got let's see, I've got you being uh ill mannered. But I want to talk about that every week. Yeah, but there's a follow up to something that you did, right you did it to me. Now I want to talk about I got a couple of rants people have wronged to me. We've got jokes we didn't get to now it's a week and a half a joke because we did just dive out into that right now. No, you want to do do jokes right now? I don't know if you want it. I wanted to talk about the cat. Okay, talk about the cat and then and then we'll get on my big office ran. This is actually kind of funny, Okay, Bertie. I think the two of us can agree on that. No, no no, but you don't. You don't know what my problem is. You think my problem is you having a cat. No, no, no, I don't. I don't necessarily want a cat. It's not from me. I'm not gonna cat. My girlfriends thinking about getting a cat. A lot of a lot of the girls from our show, uh they got cats. They got kittens, you know, including web Kathleen, she adopted a cat off and um our friend Cubby from Key to You, which is the radio station here in New York. He got a cat, a couple of kittens. He actually fosters several. It's like the Oprah Show. You got a cat, two cat kittens. So did Bethany. But here's the two kittens. Here's here's the problem. Kathleen got a cat. She's married, lives with her husband. Ye and y'all got two cats. Lives with her husband and the kids. Bethany has her own apartment. It's her cat. She lives with it. Yeah right, you want your girlfriend. Your girlfriend wants a cat. She lives on her own, on her own. But when she goes away on business, she's gonna ask you to watch the cat. Oh boy, you really think she's gonna do when she spends the weekend at your house, she's gonna bring the cat. That's not happening. So way too much expensive furniture. Oh yeah, very expensive. No really, but your furniture looks like no one's ever sat in it. Well, because well you know what, let me tell it looks like a like a picture of magazine and it don't don't sit on my like your grandma had the plastic on. I do not want claw marks in my expensive Then you tell you I'm a fan. Listen, I'm a fan of of cats. If I had the time, you're a fan of cats is Deli in Manhattan. That's about what you're a fan of. If I had a time for a cat, I would have a cat. I would have to you wouldn't. You're terrible with children and animals. You don't know what to do with them. You don't just say that's the thing though, I'm never home and I'm selfish with my time, okay, and I don't. I don't want to put the time. And how far apart do you and your girlfriend lived by? An hour? Minutes? Thirty minutes, but traffic I'm gonna say forty five. It's not like she's gonna run home, feed the cat, make sure that the little boxes clean, come back to your apartment. You can't leave the catalon. I don't mean you can't leave the catalone not having a friend. I mean you can't leave the catalone in the house without with human being to take care of. That's bullshit. You can't for a day, you can go for alf Okay, Okay, if your girlfriend comes to you on a Friday night and she wants stay till Sunday, Saturday night, kick her out on Saturday she comes Monday. Right, that's that's two and a half days. What's wrong with that? And leave the cat home alone two and a a half days every week? If they have a second one to play with, absolutely so they eat each other, they roll around in her own cat litter thesisces No, that's not how cats work. So this this card I heard that they want to You know that they play with each other hard to the company, that they live longer, right and prosper. All right, First of all, I'm calling bullshit on that. I don't I don't think you should get a cat a cat. Yeah, but she's gett a cat and every weekend she spends two and a half days at your apartment. But you have a couple options. Get used to the cat at your apartment. No, it's not coming to my apartment or moving together. So these are terrible options. I like my Space, Okay, I know you do. So here's my real problem. Tell tell, tell the listeners why why? No, I'm gonna tell you what my issue is. I told you I had an issue, but don't tell what the issue was. Explain to everybody why she wants this particular cat. And because the description on the website here comes So there's a there's a wonderful uh foster organization called Happy. Because I'm calling bullshit, I don't want to say bullshit, so all right, So it's a fostering place right where they have a lot of kittens and I'm sure they go people. Right, So there's just one kitten that she took a liking too. Because this kitten was it was in a Hurricane Irma. So Hurricane Irma was due to strike come up the coast. So this cat was in Myrtle Beach and it was hill shelter and it was scheduled to die that weekend. And this is a true story, by the way, and then all of a sudden, so so the hurricane was on its way. So the rule is we've got to take all the cats and kittens and get them to a safer place, no matter what, even though they were scheduled to be on the kill list for that weekend, they had to get him out of there. So they brought them to New York, New Jersey, and that's where this cat ended up and it had to it got a reprieve. So this kitten now has gotten a reprieve, no longer on the schedule to die list. Was rescued by one of these foster agencies and uh foster homes and is going to go to a pet adoption event on this weekend. So you know, what do you do at that point? I mean, now that makes it more entice thing like wow, this this cat was given a second second chance to live. If you have a chance, I want you to look up. Stephen Colbert on The Late Show does a segment every month pet adoption. What's that? Well, they have little doghouse they they put up puppies for adoption. He and whoever the celebrity is will take turns each grab a dog at a time and they talk about the dog, the dog's name, and they make up some fact about the dog, like this dog once saved a goat from drowning. His name is Herbie. He's up for adoption. This dog graduated college in three years. He's brilliant. Adopt this dog. Are they on Sheltered Pets and on My point is it's funny, but every dog they put up on on the Late Show gets adopted. What I'm saying, I'm sure that a lot of those stories are true. I'm sure that it pulls out your heart strings. And I understand it from the from the the point of view of the shelter. You look at the bottom line as you want to get the cats adopted. You're doing a good thing. You want to say that. I'm saying that maybe adding a backstory about Hurricane Irma might not be true. It just sounds really good right now, and it works working because your girlfriend to adopt this cat because it was almost killed, and it was it was scheduled to die, and then it was like but and then and then they're like, we moved it and now it's saved temporarily, so you have a chance to save it permanently, right or we're gonna kill it. I they're playing it are hard to play, you know. I I I'm calling possible, uh possible bullshit on the backstory. This cat could have come from the Bronx and they're like, hey, you know what, let's say we got the cat from I'm just saying it sounds so you're saying that that that it's they're not all I'm saying that. I'm saying, adopt the cat because you like the cat, but don't buy into the backstory. And like, I saved this cat from a hurricane. It sounds great, it does, but but but the cat wasn't in the hurricane and the cat may have been fine living on a golf course in Myrtle Beach. And they're like, oh, it's up for like you know, all right, And then we went on that website and every cat had a backstory. Well, the thing is, I've been to these it's like American Idol. They can't just be singers. Their aunt died and their final words were be a single no. But those yeah, but that's what draws the interest in. Do you know that the ratings went up the second they started putting back stories in and they started having cameras following them around their house and you know, all the trials and tribulations of a person's heart aches and hardships in life though, those are the stories that ring with people and they actually move people and it becomes an emotional talk to the show. Remember when Extreme Makeover Home Edition was on and they used to find people that that didn't have a lot of money and they would redo their house and like, hey, you're a newly wed couple, we're gonna rebuild your house. That's nice. Then the show turned into building houses for uh, people with disabilities, people rare diseases, and they made it more and more pulling at your heart string. Yes, because that's what TV producers do. They find those stories, they find and they blow them and it was it was great that they did that, and I'm I'm a big fan of that. What I'm saying is it the ratings went up because it was more impactful. I was happy seeing people who needed the money getting nicer homes, but it got more interesting. I got more invested in it when when people with disabilities but that it was fantastic because it shows the journey. I'm and they're doing that too with the cats. I'm saying one cat or another, they're like, oh, we go to these I've seen these superpet adoptions. I used to work with a and it's a great cause. And I'm saying, I think she got suckered. These cats and dogs that I used to see, they all had stories to them. But doesn't everyone do you have a story. I have a story story, Yeah, but couldn't it be the dog is just Hey, the dog has no place to live. That should be enough. That's not enough to get me to move to Like why is the cat more adoptable because it almost was in a hurricane? And why it didn't like rescue five people in a hurricane. Okay, it was about to die, it was, It was scheduled to die that weekend. I spoke to Cubby about it. He goes, he had me on the phone. He goes, yeah, this specific kitten was was on the list to go. Okay, weekend, the hurricane coming saved it by by moving it. Not about the cat that was born in Maine shipped down to New Jersey. He's fine, attractive, he does don't have a he doesn't have a home to live in. But because he wasn't almost in a hurricane, there's no jewic story. And that's what I'm saying. So how do you know that this? That's what I'm saying. We should be like this with jobs. Okay, maybe my job search if I ever got another job. When you know, when that time, you're gonna make up something about having like a hardship, right, I have a hardship. Hire me. I have seven toes that should be it. I don't like people. Do you think do you think that there are people that are spared being fired and because of their family, because because they're like, well, he's got he's got a wife and three kids at home, and he just got through their house burned down, and we can't let him go. Now. Yeah, I bet there's people who got married, like, hey, I just got married. Oh, you can't fire him. He just got married. You can't fire bill. Bill just got married. And then he gets his wife pregnant fast Bill. His wife's just got like so back to my story, very fired, Back to my story. Right, you have nothing? Back to my story and well wrapped this up. If the cat from Maine has no backstory and the cat from Myrtle Beach quote unquote almost in a hurricane, almost in a hard most almost almost, it's like people that were like, you know, oh my god, I was in you know, I was in Mexico like a month before the earthquake, and they tell everybody that story like somehow that means anything. Oh my god, I was, I was. I was in that town like a month earlier. So nothing happened to you. There's always had someone who wants to attach themselves to a tragedy. R Yeah, well, well when when Unfortunately, when the Paris thing happened, we had friends, we had people that we knew that we were in Paris at the time we just happened to be there around, or people that we're going to go to Paris a month later. Yes, oh my god, I'm going there a month later. And you don't get to tell that story. Yeah I was, you know, Oh my god, my kid's name is Virus. The hurricane that hit St. Martin and our friend Tony Molay was in that hurricane with his girlfriend. I was in St. Martin two years ago. Yeah, it could have been you. Okay, Son wrapped up the cat conversation. If the cat from Maine and the cat from Myrtle Beach that dodged a bullet and your girlfriend adopts the cat from Myrtle Beach and the cat from Maine is like, man, what's wrong with me? I'm from Maine, I'm a Maine coon. But it could be right. It's step a cat. If that cat doesn't get adopted after six months, you don't think they're gonna come up with a backstory. You're right, all right, all right, so you're and then the look and then people doing this to me in everyday life. Yes, and then Mary's gonna adopt the cat from Maine that that that uh, that that helped an old lady and helped her live longer and whatever, and you're gonna go, I got this cat. It was. It was a companion cat to an old lady. The cat's a hero. And you tell that story for the rest of your life and you don't know any better. So it's great. So you you enjoy that cat that may may not have dodged a bullet that was almost in a hurricane, but wasn't even in a hurricane, and it wasn't a hurricane when I got to Myrtle Beach anyway. So we're good. We're good. There, We're good there. Uh you mentioned um extreme makeup for home edition, but yeah, and you made me think of it. I did. Now that show has been off for a while, yeah, but still it's still a very funny catchphrase that they used to The catchphrase was pop culture exactly, which leads us to our unused jokes of the week right now, So I guess I'll start with that one. But why don't you explain what was going on? And but if you're just tuning into this for the first time, I want to see there are jokes that we Brody writes punchlines on the Big Show for Elvins jokes and some of them of everybody, Yeah, some of them don't get used. And then uh so we used the scraps on this show. Some of them need to set up, some of them don't. But you've got a list of a week and a half now because you just chopping at the Big Now, how do you want to do this? I have a bunch of them and you have one. You only have you do one. This was like the joke of the week and it was never done. I'm kind of pissed about that, but that's okay. So we were talking about, um, yeah, this is us, this is us the show, this is us. So I Elvis couldn't remember the name of the show, so he said what is us? And then and then it started becoming a joke in the room, like what is this? And so I think said rhyme with us? Right, So then I I started writing three word titles for the show, like someone used one. No, he used them all, but it was like what the fuck? Who the hell? Right, this is us and then this is pus. It was a bunch of them, right, So I you wrote, I wrote, move that buses a reference to Extreme Makeover Home Edition when they say, hey, buzz driver, move that bus, Mike. But he didn't do the joke, and I wrote a note to im like, hey man, this is an Extreme Makeover Home Edition. Callback he still didn't do it. He went like that he didn't do that, right, So Brodie, what are you the rest of you? We were talking about, well, all right, we were talking about Taco Bell Cantina that you can now go and get alcohol at Taco Bell. Yeah, I said this the new slogan should be shots and sharks. He didn't use that one. I wrote a joke that he didn't use. And then two days later we he somebody had called and said they in prison and that it's very hard when you leave prison. You you miss all the people back in prison. You almost want to go back in prison. So the joke I wrote was, yeah, it's hard to leave your buddies behind. That it's hard to leave your buddies behind, right, So that is Okay. By the way, that is close. You can spell buddies bu d d i e s or in this case bu d d y behind has two meetings here. Yes, okay, great. We did a story today that h Cardi b who sings Bodak yellow in her lyrics if you want to haye bodak Italian relax. So in her lyrics she thanks her dentist, and the dentist apparently is getting a lot of business because she shouted him out in the song. So I wrote that, well, her teeth are now Bodak white. That didn't get uh. Somebody called and said they bumped into mad um Uh. Camilla Cabayo said her mother walked into the bathroom at NBC and was in the bathroom and saw Madot And I said, so I wrote the joke for Elvis and he didn't use it. Oh the bathroom that used to be her playground, which is that Madonna song. I can see what Facebook. And Facebook decided to turn over all of the uh Russian UH infiltration ads that were apparently during the election. Uh. And so I said, could they and they're gonna band them from Facebook? I said, could they also turn over the pictures of people's sonograms. He didn't get to that. That wasn't a great one. That wasn't a great one. Here comes the better ones. Um Oh, Lionel Ritchie. Today they were talking with Lionel Ritchie. Okay, they they've asked Lionel Richie to be the third judge on American Idol. And I said, they've asked him once twice, three times. He said, haydn once twice, three times. A man. On that same note, I wrote, they were trying to get the deal done. They were up all night long. That's great. He gave me a dirty long. He didn't like kay man. This one today. We found out last night Hugh Hefter died. I said he's being buried. H they're burying his body this week. However, his face has been buried in boobs for seventy years. And then let the last one he wouldn't do he laughed, he wouldn't do it on the air. He said it was too offensive. And again I want to apologize. Somebody died. I understand that, but I gotta write. I write a joke. We did a story about how um a couple it hired a nanny and they they they ate her they killed her and her yeah this, by the way, I was so grossed out. I was wincing. I couldn't believe you even picked up your pen on this. I'm like Bruni's writing away in there. I'm what's he fa doing? Right? So I think, joke because somebody died. Yeah, I know. They put her on the grill. I know. So so I wrote, I wrote sing this because it's a jingle, and I wrote, I want my nanny back, Nanny back, Nanny back, I want Nanny Nanny back. Ribs. They don't want to do that, so I don't blame it for not doing it, but I had to write it, so I apologize. But sometimes you gotta go a good copy or bad copy. I mean as a comedian. Listen that. By the way, there are times that I think about I feel like I want to write stuff. I'm like, oh, this is so not this is so off color, this is so wrong, this is so inappropriate. But but how do you get over it? How do you do it? Like? How do you how do you just continue? Everybody? For instance, in the in the case of Nanny Nanny who who pretty much maimed and grilled. Okay, here Matt and nanny who was maimed and grilled terrible. First of all, I would I don't know her. I would never do it in a in an area or in a place where the family of the nanny would would hear about it. Um, we we've all made jokes about maragedy, comedy and tragedy. They call it the razor's edge. Comedy comes from tragedy. You find bad things and you find a way to make them funny so that you can get through life. And so everyone has a line in the sand. Right There are people that won't say bitch. They think it's a bad word. That well, you can't say bitch, how come you say bitch on the radio? And there are people who realize that bitch is really a female dog. And when you call someone a bitch, you're saying that pressy like a like a overly groomed female dog walking on it owns the world. That's where the term comes from. And then there are people who say the F word, but they'll say freaking, And then there's people who say fuck. Everyone has a different line and everything. How how scantily clad you dress, you have a line in bed, what you do sexually, Everyone has a line, and as a comedian, every comic has a different line. Jerry Seinfeld has a certain line that worked for him, and Louis c K has a line that works for him, and Louis Black has a line for him. And everyone has a line that they won't cross or the line that they're willing to cross. It that's who they are. And there are people who say, oh, that's that's too soon. Well, it's too soon for you. It's not too soon for the person at the desk next to you. It's not too soon. So it's not my job to figure out when it's too soon. It's my job to put it out there, and if you like it, you like it, and if you don't like it a month from now, you might. But I can't wait a month on Twitter to figure out when it's right for you, because then a hundred other people have written the same joke maybe, and you gotta get it out there in the world. And so my goal is I never strive to offend anyone. I hope I don't. My goal is to make people. I realized at an early age that that I was good at a couple of things, and one of them is making people laugh. I live for it, live to make people laugh. And if I'm gonna make nine people laugh and one person is going to be offended, I gotta go with it because the offended person is not the majority, not the norm. And I have to be honest with you. If I make twenty people laugh and I offend eighty, I still might go for it because the eighty people will get over it. But I made twenty people laugh and that's a great feeling. So anyway that sounds like that sounds welcome? Thank you clues. Uh yeah, you can always email us at the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com. Uh. This one comes from Alvaro Gonzalez. My name is Alvaro. Call me al. Just like the song, guys, this is a great welcome you eighty six was call me out. Guys are great. This is a great podcast. Just started listening and catching and catching up on it. Um, should I go back and listen to all the older ones? All seven? All seven? I think you couldn't dress If you like number eight, I think you do. Yeah, listen, listen to the first one and then listen to another one. That's his next line. He says, I think that it's crazy and it's awesome and hilarious that you guys use the another one drop, which I don't have pulled up right now. I've listened to the main show for maybe five years. I have a bad confession that makes me feel bad. For the first few weeks, I thought you two were the same person because you two sound similar. Wow, me and you sound similar? Yea? How often does this happen? Does it happen that often? And others on the show don't really? Hello, he this guy thinks that that people on the show mix us up. Okay, so I think he means listeners, here's great. Thank you Alvaro from Georgia. I love you Alvaro. So here's the thing, Alvaro Alvaro, I think it's Alvaro baseball play. Alvarrospinosas so Scary and I grew up in the same neighborhood. We have the same basic accent, basic likes and dislikes as far as growing up in the same area. Um so we have the same kind of accent, especially if you're not from this area. If you're from Georgia, then we sound a lot of like on the show, Scary gets confused for Greg t who sound nothing alike to a New Yorker, but because their role is on the show, are about the same amount of talk time, and they chime in off Mike, and they are not in every conversation. Because their level of acting on the show are performing on the show is about the same, they often get confused. I don't speak a lot on the main show, so we don't get confused on the big show. But I will tell you a funny story many years ago, when my dad was still alive, right here in the middle of the yeah, because it's it relates Salvos letter, my own father sent me a phone tap that uh someone had sent them and it it didn't have the intro at the beginning, so I didn't have us reading the letter. They just had the phone ringing in the phone tap. And he said, oh, I heard your prank phone call. Here's I listened to it. Someone sent me this file. It's hilarious. He was telling me it was funny. It was actually Scary's phone tap. My own father hurt Scary doing the phone call though it was that it was me alright, So I could see through a microphone we're processing there's a similarity, and we both kind of yelling, you know, not things bother us. Here's mail from Taylor stan Fell on the Grocery Divider. Hey, scary and Brody. Oh he's scary. It's my topic. It's just started listening to the podcast a few days ago. I'm loving it. Finished episode seven. Was dying laughing about the complain about people being offended from putting the grocery divider up. I work in a Whole Foods as a cashier while while I was in grad school. Uh so you can imagine the type of persnickety people I deal with on a daily basis. Anyway, my biggest pet peeve is that no one ever uses the damn divider and then customers literally look at me like I murdered their firstborn son when I accidentally begin to scan the groceries of the person behind them. How am I supposed to know that this isn't your keen one, cal Carol, bitch, I don't know your life. Help your care shears out, and use the divider. Keep the episodes coming, Taylor. Taylor, Yeah, I don't want to stereotype Whole Foods customers because I am one occasionally, but I could see them being a little extra persnickety. Yeah, here's a correction from our to Harris Won at gmail dot com on the word Porsche. In episode seven Scary, you mentioned the word Porsche. Jump ahead. It's actually too syllable. It's Porsche. Yeah, it's actually Porsche. Right. Porsche is a very common mispronunciation. Well, guess what I learned something today. I always called it a Porsche. Is it really Porsche? Okay? I only know to ROSSI Porsche pss. So here here's the my answer to that email. You know me, I like grammar to be correct. Porsche is the Americanized version, the same way we say Spain, but Spain calls it Espana. In America, when the car came over, people started calling it Porsche. Right. In the movie Risky Business with Tom Cruise, an all time classic, he says, I believe he's he's um. He's a parking attendant and he drives the car and he speeds around in the Porsche. Right. You you just said Porsche too. Well, it's my point. He drives like a maniac, and he and he's stops and he turns his head and he goes Porsche. There are no substitutes. Well, there is no substitute one of those. So so because of that catchphrase in that film, I think Porsche has become the thing, the thing, although the company of Porsche would tell you it's Porsche, al right. I wonder if the dealer would but like gone into a Porsche or dealership. Let us know if they call their own car. Why don't you well look up a Porsche dealership now and call them. Yeah, let's do that, all right, while we do that, while we get on the phone, I want to get one last one on. This is what you called during my rant. I can do that. Yeah, let's let's let's actually do that. Let's call a Porsche dealership Porsche. See, I'm I'm sucking up to a lot more. Uh. This is a spell check in Alabama from Gentry ben Brook at gmail dot com. But we love the misspellings. We love when you are the grammar police for us. Uh, scary and Brody another scary and Brodie Brody. Please help me explain that alphabetically Brody is truly First, I'll fuck you. They've mentioned my name first, but then they's trying to say that they feel bad, abou I'm gonna feel bad anyway. Appreciate all the intelligence that you guys give. Do we drop knowledge? I didn't know we do that. Uh alright, so scary this I got one for you. Enjoy the show so much. I feel empty when I run out of content and sometimes listen to it over and over again. Thank you, and we did this. Oh, this is a bus that was going around. So about a week ago, Donald Trump was in Huntsville supporting a candidate who ended up losing. Yeah, this weekend he was promoting Luther strength. Anyway, this is a whole thing that needs to be Wow. It's a picture of the tour bus that was going around. Go ahead, and it says on it judge Judge Roy Moore, Alabama's choice. But then the website, the website that they list on the truck and this is this is an entire are huge picture, huge butts that's wrapped in this, and it says the website is Alabama deserves more dot Com. No, I don't know if that was the correct website. They spelled it wrong on the one deserve so it's Alabama deserves more dot Com. Like so it deserves d E R s E r v E s more spelled wrong on purpose because that's the guy's name by inwards m O O r E dot com Alabama deserves more? Wow, somebody paid for this? How do they spell deserves d E R S E r V. Well, I'm gonna follow up, and I'm I'm okay, see if first of all, see if Alabama deserves more dot com is a real website, because if not, maybe that's why they lost. By the computer. Well, here's what to say about they wrapped an entire book. This is like a double that's like the Snickers commercial where she tattoos regrets instead of regrets. Yeah, here's what I'll say though, to follow up on that. His name is Roy Moore. He ended up winning. Okay, Oh, this is the guy that won. Yeah, mistaken lee President Trump. While campaigning for the other guy, the other guy kept calling him Ray Moore, like Raymore and Flannagan, so he didn't spell it wrong, but he kept calling him Ray instead of Roy. So not a lot of luck. But the guy won, so yeah, exactly. So Hey, and this was not the guy that erroneously said that that was the guy that Trump supported, But it wasn't he Trump supported the other strang Okay, and one one final one from the Brooklyn Boys on Twitter. When we're ever gonna get that Brooklyn Boys, WTF for now? Uh? And it's came from the Brooklyn guy. This guy is hilarious, the brook Corner Brooklyn. I love Corner Brooklyn. What's his name, The corner guy, the corner Guy. Yeah, it's the guy Corner, the Guy Corner. Yeah. So he saw an ad for something where the the code, the coupon code was f K subway. Oh, it was a sign that he saw a sign a code word to get your fifty f K subway. An he wrote, fuck subway. I say that all the time. How do you make your code f K subway? You know people are gonna like, I guess it's memorable, but you know people gonna like so equate that. So that was kind of an intentional misspelling. But still I don't know. Well, my friend Craig was a big Star trek nerd went and listed all the Star Trek shows and Star Trek when you because they usually have long titles like Star Trek Next Generation is st n G and uh Star Trek um Space nine. Right, Well that's a film. I'm talk about the TV shows Star Trek Voyagers, STV Anyway, the new show is uh Star Trek Discovery, which is STD. That's unfortunately unfortunate. I don't know any of those names made it out of my parents basement. You're gonna call a Porsche dealership. In the meantime, I'm gonna save my rant about the bad waitress. I've been holding on because I have a long rant, a short rant. I want to. I wanna give a rant shout out, a rant out, a rant out. Um I have as many of you know, I don't eat vegetables. I don't like that. And when I ought a Chinese food, the word no vegetable is attached to everything. So rose Pokelomano vegetable is one word to me, rose Poke fried rice, no vegetables. One time egg drop suit makes no greens. That's it. I don't ever forget it. That's how I speak. Okay, there are Chinese restaurants, let's say this four that I order from all the time. They know me as the no vegetable guy. They know my first name. At this point, they all know me. And if my mom comes to visit she wants chicken and broccoli, they'll even go, oh, your mom's in town, or they'll say you want the broccoli, because they know I' on on vegetables. But there's a peripheral Chinese place that's a couple of towns over that. Every once in a while my wife will go, you know what, I'm in the mood for that place. So I call up this place and I order like eighty dollars worth of Chinese food. And they're not accustomed to me on the phone. I've ordered out a few times, we've eaten there a few times, but they don't know me, and I gotta be honest. Their English isn't as good as some of the places that I've ordered from, so it was a lot of repeating what I said, So I slowly would say, no vegetables, how special panfied noodles, No vegetables right, okay. So I get there and this is giant bag on the window sill and a medium bag a lot of food were picking up for the five of us, and she goes, okay davids, yes, yeah, no vegetables right, all that's no vegetables. That's me now, I always check it before I leave. Before you go on, I have a question for you. Yes, are there certain things that you quantify as vegetables, but they don't well apparently, yes, apparently yes. Now if a place makes this mistake once, I'll remember for next time to throw it as certainly a potato is a vegetable, but still but they can it falls into the vegetable. I don't want a Chinese food has potatoes in it. I'm wanna Chinese food dishes had potatoes. Right. It's like saying, when you go to a change restaurant, they give your bread so so so so the word vegetable in their eyes, all I want is meat, chicken, shrimp, and noodles. When you say no vegetables, if you said that to me, Brodie, I would get you, okay, I would actually understand what you're talking. Right, So this is what the woman says to me. She puts these big bags on the counter. Now I'm gonna go through them, even though it's perfectly packed, because I'm i gotta drive fifteen twenty minutes back three towns over. She says, Okay, no vegetable. A scalion is okay, though, right? Scalion Okay, let me tell you something. Scalion Okay, Uh, it's technically a word in two letters. That is the worst thing you could say to me, I fucking hate scallions. It's like soap. It's like so I hate it. I don't throw I don't need it to be green, don't throw stuff in for color. I hate scalion. I hate them. I hate my scalion. Okay, I said no, Oh you said no vegetable. Yes, scallions a vegetable. It's a type of onion. Onion is vegetable. When what what? What planet? If you understand the word vegetable, would you not know scion is a vegetable. So now she has to take out the twenty five things I've ordered whatever I'm exaggerating, could have been fifteen, I don't know, and lay them all out on the ledge and look to see each one that has scallions, and so this, okay, I have to not wait? Do I do? I smell free dessert coming? Who? So I have to wait now on extra twenty minutes while they remake all the food and had scout or they pick out all the scullions. I don't know. So the manager sees me I'm not happy, and he comes up. He goes, oh, we heard about scallions, right, So yeah, he says, I'll take care of you. I'll take care of you. Don't worry. We'll make you happy. So it comes back with my bags like ten minutes later. Listen, don't give me the whole they spit in your food thing. I don't. I don't want to hear it. I don't. I'd rather they spit in my food then put scullions in my food. That's how much I hate scallions. So he comes over me. He comes over to me, and he says to me, dude, you're a nightmare of a customer. He says, I gave you free order sesame noodles. Okay, cold sesame noodles are like four. I don't like cold sesame noodles. I got nothing. How about saying to me, I'll take something off the bill for your trouble and a way, Well, how about, hey, what do you like? Would you like a couple of egg rolls? Would you like a little general choke chicken noe broccoli? By the way, Also, one who are much it cuts him too much money, you can't. So instead he's got me some what's laying around, what doesn't need to be prepared. Cald sesame noodles. That's the cheapest thing in the cabinet dles. What might it cost? You might as well have offered me free white rice. But he looked at me like, I got your back, bro, I got you, I got I got you. You know what, I hooked your ass out. He gave me the wink. He gave me the wink and like an elbow. You don't want to been hooking you on a free rocket. Heck, give me, you know what, Give me a lot, Give me a small spar up. You know what they did. I ordered spare ups and they come in that red bag with the sitt the tinfoil inside it leaks through anyway, What kind of bag? What kind of acid are they putting on this thing? And those the white containers with the wire handles, the wire always fucking falls off, By the way, where is mommy dearest? No wire handles ever? Hard come. I can go to p F. Chang's and they've got white containers with no wire handles. You can pop right in the microwave there. Because they've advanced. They realized there was a problem there and they fixed. Hey, I don't understand something. P F. Chang's is not owned by Asian people to my knowledge, and they don't really have They have not been hundreds of years in the Asian takeout food business. They're not yet. They perfected the to go container. They did, and so did Panda Express. For that matter, Panda Express they don't use. They don't use those white cardboard boxes that you just fold like an order. But they used styrofalls and the sauce strips out they leaked to They saw strips out of the crack. Goddamn it. By the way, curb your enthusias why the theme song to Fear the Walking Dead from my podcast. Look, if you're gonna sell me ribs, develop a bag that doesn't leak the rip juice. Sunday Night, HBO, they're back. Curb your enthusiasm. October first, October one, Sunday Night. Put the SPA rabs in a plastic container with a lid that seals alright, that's not my ramp. By the way, ship go on with God? Did you call push? Well, here's the thing. I figured, what better place to all Porsche then in the motor city of Detroit. So I got three Porsch dealer call him up in Detroit. Let's go, okay, these are let's call this one here Porsche of motors. By the way, you know, if you call the New York Port dealer ship, they're go, yeah, Pors. Okay, I'm calling it all right, gallions, um calling Porsche of Motors of the motor City. They're up until eight today. By the way. Oh nice, thank you for choosing motor Yes, I I'm so sorry. Hi, Cheryl, did you say Porsche the motor City or did you say Porch of the Motor City, of the motor City. Thank you so much. We we got into a debated work because I'm okay, tell me why you laugh? First? Why did you laugh? Cheryl? I don't know? Okay, do you correct? You are use questioning the yes because we know that it's technically Porsche. We're trying to settle it be but no, no, I don't. But but we know that like in Risky Business, Tom Cruise says Porsche there are no substitutes, and Americans call it Porsche. So was that the first thing they taught you when you got the job there? Don't call it Porsche? Correct? Now? Do you do you correct? Do you correct? Said the same thing? And we're told I got a question for you. When you have customers come in there and they're they're Porsche enthusiasts, but they say Porsche. They say Porsche. Do you correct them? Or and have you seen that before? Do you use the trick of just saying it again in the next sentence so they hear it? It's basically what I do. I don't really correct them. Yeah you so, do they get it wrong? Do they get it wrong? Do they say the wrong? Yeah? So? So give me an example, Cheryl. If I said to you, Hey, I'm how much is that red Porsche? What would you say? I would tell you I will get the salesman to help you. But but but you you wouldn't say I'll find out how much that red Porsche is? Not okay? Because I would I would absolutely then say it like suddenly, but does anyone come in or only people have already owned the car and are buying another one another one? Uh? Do they say Porsche or like they don't they don't know it's Porsche. I don't know about I would say probably maybe half okay. Now, when you don't work there anymore, will you go back to saying Porsche? Probably not okay? So um, kind of come in for test drive today later? What time you up until we are here today? What is today? Today is Thursday, eight o'clock. Great, my name is Greg T and I should be there and around five o'clock and my name is Nate. I had sex at work anyway, So we were talking about a long time not with this now didn't anyway. So we were talking about my my friend Gregg here wants to buy a portion a Porsche and he and he'm just calling it a Porsche and I said it's a portion and he said the portion? He goes, how do you he gets that to me? You dumbass? I said, if you could have you could afford a Porsche, you should be able to say you should be able to say the name of the car you want to buy. Yeah. Anyway, So Cheryl, thank you very much for settling that. We really appreciate it. Thank you, guys, thank you so much. Can you have any nine elevens and stock in red? They do not know I would you like me to put you through to the sales? No, you know he's gonna come in tonight. I'll come in and I'm gonna probably walk off the lot with one if I can. I'm gonna take you. Sound like you have a New York accent. Are you from we are? Yes? Originally yes, yes, but we're in town here, and we figured that the prices are cheaper in the motor city because it's you make them there. Well, you're a dumbass. I'm sorry, Chryl. I thank you, You're you're wonderful. Thank you so much. What do you what do you think over at the Ford Dealership, at the Ford lot, at the at the at the plants. I thought they made cars in Detroit, you dick. They do American cars, by the way, I have I have never owned, personally a non American car, by the way, you have never never wow, I've never owned oh wow. And I've owned both. My first car was an Oldsmobile. I've had both for those of you remember Oldsmobile. And then I had um Pontiac Grand Prix, had Dodges, I had had Fords, a Ford Mustang, then I had I've had Dodges and Jeeps since so I had the Ford Mustang filed by the Pontiac Grand Am I'm liking this. I had, I had a Grand Prix. Uh. Then I went to the Honda Civic. I had a Buick Park Avenue and then followed by a BMW. I had a couple of Dodge Darts back in the day, old ones, and I drived on Dodge charges for look at you all American all the time, the flag, by the way, America, by the way, the car, my my Dodge charger, American cars like again, but but an American company. And by the way, I know Dodge is owned by Fiat, which is an Italian company. I understand that, but Dodgers made the plant is in America. I feel better, and I feel like American. They told you like you're like the kitten stuck in arms, right they Dodge brothers exactly and then you what did you do? I bought another one, another one that's exactly it. By the way, Yeah, I'm on my fourth charger. If we didn't, if we didn't. Speaking of chargers, we're gonna get to that in a second, but I want to make an observation. I also want to talk about if she was from New York, New Jersey. They hung up after ten seconds, you know, thank you. I don't have time for this. Hold on. Should we call one more Detroit dealership? I feel like Detroit's loaded now They're already loaded, like being nice. Now someone's gonna call it port. I think you should call a New York porch dealership. You want me to call absolutely In the meantime, let's talk about the charger, but now Dodge charger. Okay, But I also want to talk to you about what you did to me in the study video. What did I do in the studio? Can we talk about that for a minute? Okay, yesterday, I'm gonna call town part in a second. Don't give names of what you're calling. Then I'm not going to call them. Call somebody. I'll call the other one. Another one. By the way, there's a commercial that runs in New York and it runs a lot of times during Met games and it's for uh Bentley? Is it for Bentley? I feel like it's for Bentley and the whole thing is like, finally a second Bentley dealership in North Jersey. Is there such a glove of people buying Bentley's they need another one? Another one? Who's buying Bentley's, Who's and who's watching the Met Games? Sitting home going? I wish there was a second Bentley dealership in New Jersey, a Rolls Royce dealership. It's Rolls Royce Maserati Manhattan, Maserati. It's a second Maserati. That's it. That Please, if you have a Maserati, God bless you. But if you have a Maserati, you're spitting on porsches. What is the line of people like on a Saturday afternoon on the Maserati dealership. Oh my god, they got a second one. We needed a second one because we don't have enough salespeople. It's very funny. But hold on a second. Let's call another might and then we're gonna talk about the charger, but not the Dodge charger. I want to also talk about how did I funk You were in the studio. You were recording a commercial and I needed you. They needed you back in the studio, the main studio for the big show. So I walk in and I wedge my body into the studio so that the door is leaning on my shoulder, and I opened it and I say, hey, Scary, they need you right away. You're like, hold on, scary, they need you right they need you, And I like, by the way, said now you got a couple of minutes, but they need you for the next break. So you didn't need to run. They needed you in five minutes. You swing the door all the way open, and you let it slam into my arm because I know where my bread is buttered. When Elvis calls, I come of running. All right, he's the guy that hired me twenty two years ago. When you say L just needs you, he's the only person in this building that I will do that for. And I don't give a funk who's in my way. If you were in front of me, I would have pushed you. So we we've talked about how you don't hold those for women. You WoT. No, No, here's the worst part, because hold on. When you slam me with the door, I said, ouch, that wasn't nice, scary, And your response to me was, yeah, save it for the podcast. You didn't give a ship other than it was content for this podcasting care But let me tell you something that you did. You rude motherfucker. I don't know who you're talking about. Okay, you we were supposed to do this podcast, Okay, right before this podcast. You do your Walkers and Talkers podcast. Fantastic. It's a great place. Yeah, we just talked about that podcast. Awesome with your co host Jamie. She's the best, best, she's been working since probably four or five this morning, and then she comes in here and she was ready for your ten forty five am podcast. Nope, not hold on. You told me you were gonna record at ten forty five. She thought you were gonna be here recorded ten forty five, because she showed up at ten forty and she was, where's bro to you? I said, I don't know. I said, aren't you guys gonna do a podcast in five minutes? She goes yes, and she took a seat on the couch, and then I walked back. And now fifteen minutes later, it's eleven o'clock and I'm like, where the hell is he? Weren't you supposed to start your podcast? And she was like, yep, where is he? I don't know where he is. He said, he's in the back. He's doing something. I'm like, that is absolutely rude. You do it all the time, Brodie. You set a time for something and then you're late. So here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna take you trying to make me look bad and turn it around and make you feel bad. Now, okay, So so from looking bad to feeling that I was late this morning to the big show, because as you know I have a bad back, but that was the big show, the big show. I woke up today my back was completely locked up. I couldn't get out of bed, and we got you covered and I didn't say not, and I never would. I didn't get here. He was about a half hour late, because once you're late a little bit. I was like ten minutes late. Then the traffic builds up in the morning, and then late a lot you got. You can't miss that window. So the whole show I was hunched over in pain. And then after the show, we did the fifteen minute morning show, we had a meeting that we did a Jared Letto interview, so we went from boom to boom to boom, right, and the Jared Leto interview ended around around ten thirty five, right, roughly right. I had a couple of minutes to go upstairs to the mail room where they keep the medicine, they keep the pills, and the right to get some leave to loosen my backup because I couldn't walk and it was so bad. It was constricting my airways and I couldn't breathe. So let me ask you, did you stop? And you just took a moment so I took a moment and I went upstairs and they had motrin thilent all and in the blue box that mentally I thought was a leave was Adville. And I'll show you in my pocket, like, grab some Adville which is here. This is the pack. So I'm not bullshitting you packages Attra. But it does. But it kills the pain, but it doesn't loosen your muscles. Okay. So Rupert the mail guy, said, hey, man, I have a problem with my back. I know a leave is much better. Let me run down to the store field I get you some of leaves. That's really cool. So I said, no, Rush, I gotta do a podcast for Jamie in a couple of minutes. He said, I'll be real quick, and so he got me to leave. I took the pills and then apologize to Jamie and did the podcast like yep, you are but okay, but no, but it was for any other reason that had nothing to do with the medical emergence. I am occasionally late, but not to be disrespectful, but today especially I was in a lot of pain. It's all good, all right, now? Can I call brook called Brooklyn, and Brooklyn don't drive Porsches. Don't call there's no Brooklyn Porsche. Call Manhattan Porsch. What New Jersey Porch? Got one right here, by the way, if you drive a Porsche in Brooklyn, I apologize, I want to use it. I want to call one with the word Porsche in the name town. Stop giving out the names. Okay, I got one, I got one. Okay, call this guy right here. You know it's a guy. Was it Joe's Porsche? The name the name of the person who owns it, guy Mikey bo Bots is Porsche? Al Right, here we go, Porsche. We'll see. I think he's gonna say Porsche. We'll see. Daniel. Hello, what thank you for calling Dac Daniel Porsche? Hi? Hi? Who is this Christine? Hi? Christine, I'm here, my my coworker, um Nate and uh we had a debate. If you could just help us out real quick, you answered the phone a certain way. My friend Nat here wants to buy a car. He's looking for for a car that you sell, but he keeps calling it Porsche. Could you explain him that it's pronounced Porsche. Yeah, he's correct, pronounced it's poor. Thanks, I'm correct, Yes, it's Porsche. So it's not Porsche, right now? Do you get that? A lot to people come in there and call it Porsche pronouncing like more often than not they mispronounce it. Now, is that the first thing they taught you at the dealership when you got hired? The first thing? Because I was corrected and I feel like an asked. Now, I feel like I shouldn't even buy a Porch. I'm not even worthy of a Porsche because because I'm calling them, but I'm like Naven the car that you want to buy. No, it's a uh No, that's the name of the dealer, you know, Jackie Jackie, right, is your name? Christie Christine? Christie? We have sorry Jackie jack Christine. Um, you saw the movie Risky Business with Tom Cruise, right, The famous line in the movie is Porsche. There are no substitutes. So that's what sucked me up. Man, Sorry, hey watch them out right? She's from Okay. So, so when you're not at work, do you like secretly call it Porsche, like to just like stick it in the face of your employees, like just porsh What do you call a Porsche? By accident? Sometimes? No, Ever, since I learned the proper you know, etiquette. I I always stuck with that just because I feel like I'm you know, I'm just facing the name of Porsche by pronouncing it now that I know what it's correctly, right, But the sales people call it Porsche correct all right. See see they trained that, they okay, school they probably Here's our question. If if a customer comes in and calls it a Porsche, what do you do? Do you correct them or do you then say the sentence similarly, saying it the right way so they hear you say it? Probably the second Yeah, that's the second one. Men. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what that's what That's what I could do. Yeah, that's what right. Our boss does that. He will repeat it and whatever the word is he mispronounce. You have a customer try and correct you and say, wait a second, you're saying Porsche. It's Porsche. No. Actually feel dumb, Yeah, like me, But there's there's got to be people that once you want Yeah, there's got to be people though, that wants to hear it the right way. They probably someone had said to you, I'm still gonna call a Porsche. Yeah alright, oh yeah they did. I'm gonna come in and I'm gonna pick one. Can I catch drive one? Sure? Absolutely? He wants to come and go in the weekends, probably tomorrow, Crazier on Sunday, Sunday Sundays in Berken County with Oh, that's right, right, Well, we very much appreciate you, thank your time for settling that, for appreciate that. Oh, you're very welcome, and we look to see you guys in here some day. Okay, thank you, You're very welcome. Toure thanky say in the New York Tristate area, they'll correct you. They'll they'll passive aggressively go, oh, you want to see the red Porsche. Oh, the Porsche you're asking about, you'll see it. Yeah, yeah, but it's Porsche. Again, if you're not in the dealership at supports the way I looked. Um, I gotta tell you I looked a little foolish today. I would say that, yeah, well this is this is one of them. If you could picture parallel. Huh no, it's it's headed in parking. So what parking spots next to each other? Pull in? There are four parking watch next to each other. They're as signed in my building, assigned parking. By the way, remind me next week about parking. I have a rant about parking. Oh yeah, another one, right, another one, another one. So so if if you're looking at the four spaces, there's the one on the left, okay. Then there's the next one, which is my parking space. Then there's a third parking space, which is always empty, and then there's a fourth parking space, which is belongs to the guy on the end. And the guy on the end on the right owns two parking spaces but only has one car. He only puts his car on the right most space because it's at the aisle. And then he bought the left space, which is the space between me and him. He bought it. Hold on, he bought it because he's got an expensive car and he's afraid that I'm gonna dentist. And then let me tell you something. The kind of car that he's got in that spot, and that one he can afford three spaces, okay, So he bought does he go into the too Maserati dealerships in New Jersey. He's one of those. So I I park in the second space of the four spaces one to three four, I parking space number two, right, that's my spot. That's my assigned spot. He's got three and four. Guess what, Brodie. I show up to my spot yesterday and the guy from spot number one was in. No someone was parked in my space. Number two. Someone's in my parking space. So number one and number two were taken, but number two was taken by some random person, some renegade. And I'm like, ship, I gotta where to put my car, So I'm gonna stick my car in spot number three. The guy the one, the guy owns the empty the empty it's always empty, the the other one. And then that guy is in number four right or he wasn't there. It was in the middle of the day, so three and four were empty. Three and four were empty, but I parked number three because I know spot number three is always in right now, have you seen this guy? Does he know your car as he's seen you getting out of your blue car? I don't know. But the point is. The point is I left the day for twenty four eighteen hours. I wake up this morning, I go over to the garage. Spot number one spot number two are both empty spot an asshole. I'm in spot number three and then the other guy. The guys in spot number four with his car, so he had come home parked his car in his spot. Your no, I feel like he gave me like the the you know, kind of like just like a free a free passage. The point I did, there's nothing there. I heard the guy was gonna give me a little dent. I would keep my car because this guy thinks that I parked in his parking So you technically did. I did, but I only did it because the guy was in my part on your car, guy. The problem is I have no proof now because I wake up and I go to my car and spot number one and number two empty. So this motherfucker number four probably keep figures right. He comes home, says, look at this spot. It's like when you go in one stall and some guys stinking up the bathroom. The other stall he leaves and some of else comes in and they're like, you got playing for the steak. So someone took a dump in your spot, so you took a dump in his. I was hoping that the guy that all too both of those guys in one and two would have still been there to realize, Okay, this is a bit of a screw up, right, But I look like it. And if it happened when he was there, you could have left a note on his car. But he wasn't there. He wasn't there. You know. It's a little funny thing to happen. All right, Well you've seen his package right here. Yes, Oh, we're going back to the charger. This is it. This is where I'm gonna. I'm gonna. I don't need to rant yet, but let me tell you what happened. Hold my music for a second. This has happened to everybody who works in an office, and it shouldn't happen. I sit in the Morning show office. This five desks. I have the first one when you walk in in the room, and I take a laptop on my desk, and then behind my laptop, which I can't see when my laptop is open, I have a search protector on the desk where I plug in my laptop and my speakers that are powered with a big box thing, and I plug in my charger. It's a USB box, and then I have a USB cable plugged into it, so it's not an old school one with the cables attached to it. And I have I had a Galaxy Note three, you know, I'm an Android fan, and I had Galaxy Note four and the four a lot of apps running, and it used a lot of power and my phone needed to be charged like three times a day. So I got one on Amazon. I bought one for like fifteen bucks. It's a three point oh, which is the fast charging system. It's a little more money, and I keep it on my desk in the search protector with a USB cable from my phone, and I would charge my phone three times a day at least I'd have to charge it, so I was always aware of it. Well, as you know, I just got the same Sun Galaxy S eight plus plus, right, But the battery life on this thing is unbelievable. So I charge it like once every other day. And I'm not doing a commercial. It's a fantastic phone. And so hey, Bixby, I turned I turned that off. Turned it off when we're in so it doesn't go on we're on the air. No, Bigsby is just the personal assist that comes to the phone stop at the comparisons. All right, all right, so we were off Thursday. I'm sorry. We were all Friday last week, so Thursday I didn't need to charge my phone because it's got a great battery life. Friday wasn't here. Monday, I plugged my phone into charge it. Tuesday, I plugged my phone into charge it, and I see that the cables just laying there. So I followed the cable and there's no charger anymore. The box is gone. So I'm like, holy crap. Did it disappear Monday? And I'm I'm plugged into nothing on Tuesday. But because the thing last so long, I didn't really need to charge it, but I forced to have it. So I noticed my chargers gone. So I'm like, all right, well, apparently someone over the weekend took my charger. Of course, Now look first, chargers all the time. Look and I because it's a USB charger. Back in the day, when you use an Android charger, if it had the cable attached to it and you were an iPhone user, you were screwed. But if you can take the USB cable out and plug your USB cable in with an iPhone cable, right, Okay, So someone took my box, my charger box and expensive three point o qualcom certified box, and it's gone. So I asked everybody in the morning show, that's here nobody has it. I go with all the studios. We have like five studios. Here's looking around. No I I spent twenty minutes looking forward. I could find it. So I send an email out. There's fifteen sixteen people in the Morning Show, and we have four DJs outside of the Morning Show that work at the radio stations and New York a couple of part time is but for the most part for people. So I email everybody people in the Morning show, like you know. So as I said, like, hey, anyone seeing my charger, it's missing. I appreciate it return back. Here's the link from Amazon dot com. So you know what it looks like. It's black and has started writing on it. So in case you see other ones, you'll know what mine look like. Other ones. Most of the people in the Morning Show just came to me personally and said, hey, we don't have your charger. We wouldn't take your charger, would certainly put it back. So one of the DJ's emails me and says, hey, man, I saw the charger in the in the air studio. Now the Morning Show does the show in the studio. We're in right now, the over stra and show studio. But everybody else does their show from the studio from the Z one D studio. He says, Hey, I saw it in the D studio, plugged into the outlet by the microphone. So so I wrote him back. I said, hey, when did you see it? He was, It was there Wednesday and Thursday, but Friday it was gone, which means this thing's been missing from my desk for a week. But because it's for can phone is so awesome. I haven't even noticed. I've been charging it with nothing. I've been charging you to a cable. It wasn't attached because it's behind the laptop. I didn't see it, okay, he says, But Friday it was gone and it's not in there now. I said, well, was it I saw right? Beega? Was it plugged in with a DJ? Stands yes, So okay, it's one of the three other DJs, right, it's gonna be one of them. So I send that an email to the four of them so that no one would know that one of the other DJs told me, and I said, hey, it's been brought to my attention that now. This is like three hours later. No one has responded to my email from the DJ staff except this one guy, and as I said, it's been broked to my attention that the charger that that I emailed you about three hours ago was in the main studio for two days and now it's missing. So one of you, since it's only four of you, barred my charger, was using it for your shift, left it in there for multiple days. Now it's gone, so you need to face up and you have the link order me a goddamn new charger. Well, now that it's narrowed down, I get this email. Ha yo. I did use that charge of the other day because I had lost my charger and needed some juice real quick, but totally forgot to put it back in the a M. Show office after using First of all, we have a giant room for the morning show with five desks. As I mentioned, No, you didn't forget to put it back in the a MS officers. You forgot to plug it back into my search protector and put it back on my freaking desk. Then, he continues, noticed it wasn't there the next night when I was going to put it back. So next the next day, after he went home and was going to use it a second day, he noticed it wasn't there, He says, I just assumed you or someone else had grabbed it and put it back. So he assumes that after he stole my power charger, I would know where it was and go get it and then go back to my desk and not ask who the funk took my charger. He says. I think it was Wednesday when I saw it wasn't there, he says. In any case, I didn't put it back right away. Sorry, um, and so hey, if it doesn't show up today, let me know if you want me to buy you a new one. So I wrote back, First of all, the problem isn't that you didn't put it back. The problem is that you took my fucking charger off my desk, plugged into my search protector. So number one, don't touch my ship. Second of all, it isn't gonna turn up because after three days someone took someone stole it. So I said, you have the link in the email, order me a goddamn charger right now. How convenient? Well, I had originally sent the links and they'd see the picture. And by the way, if you want of those people offended by me saying goddamn, I'm sorry, apologizing continue. Okay, I don't think anybody who listens to this podcast. Okay, if you've made it this far into this podcast, I said, so, let's assume it's not going to show up along time, order me the charger right now. I don't haven't touched my stuff again. Okay. If he had said to me, sent me a text message on the first night, hey man, I barged your your charger. I appreciate it, but I'll put it back, no problem. If on the second night he saw it wasn't there, and he sent me a message and said, hey man, I borrowed your charger. Do you have it? Because I don't see it in the studio. I want to make sure you got it. I'd even buy that. Would you be okay with it? Though? If he would have said I borrowed your charger, any form of that, if he would have alerted you before you found out, he would have been okay with any and I would have said, hey man, you know what, I really would appreciate it if you left it plugged in and charged your phone at my desk, because yeah, that's an option to right put if your phone's charge. Now, if your life is so important, you can't live for twenty minutes without your phone and you have to charge it, take the cable and the box. Would ever take it put it back, but he didn't. He didn't do it. So he sends me that I'm sorry I didn't put it back. No, man, I'm sorry. I took your charger. Is what you should have said. So he ordered me a two of them. But what the hell you need two? Four? Well, I said so so no no, So I said, hey, why don't you keep one? So next time he had a damn charger, you'll have one. And he said, no, no, you keep it for your troubles and brought me here we go in this bag from Amazon that I got two of them, two chargers. So if you borrow somebody's charger, he did the right thing. He did the right thing each he could have roughly with taxi. All. Well, here's the thing. If your coworker bars your ship number one, they shouldn't borrow your ship without asking. But if they do because they figured it's a big family, they should tell you they borrowed it. And if it goes missing after they borrow it, he should have brought me a new one before I ever realized it. Man, this is like three or four different rants and one this guy like sucked up on several levens. So I want you to tweet us at David unscore, Brody, at Scary Jones and at Brooklyn Boys. WTF. What would you do if you and me? Would you be like had no big deal? Would you be pissed any barren and didn't put it back or just pissed? An got to tell you, Brodie. And and this is just my opinion here I'm listening to this. I wouldn't let a charger ruin my day a lack of I've had my charges. I have an iPhone, which, by the way, like of the radio station has iPhones. Do you know how many times I've loved Oh, as a matter of fact, and I look over it's missing right now. I was gonna say, do you know how many times? But the one I keep in the studios missing? The one that I keep in this outlet right over here, this outlet Brodie and I share, it's gone. So so the point is, do you know many times and how many chargers that I've lost over over the years? A lot? But you know what you win something? You lose something I lose. Nonet. Here's the thing. It evens itself out, you know how. Here's how you let people step on you. I go to no because I know because I just don't at it. I just no sweat man, how do you man? Here's how I win, because do you know how many times I've checked into hotels and right there attached to the lamp is someone who left their fucking charger behind. And I hope you go to the front desk and tell them that the last person there left their charger, then you preserve to have your stolen. No. I put it in my suitcase because I'm like, you know what for every charger that I've lost, it's it's a freaking Apple phone charger. It's a USB cable attached to a little like little plant. How much you were plug? I don't hand me now. Then you win some you lose. I win something over the years. You mean to tell me, Brodie that you you haven't once found Here's what I would like that you just picked up and kept. Nope, Here's what I'll tell you. If I check in, if I eat checking a hotel and I leave something in the hotel room charges like earbus, and if you have bucks pouring out of your ass, and I'll stand behind you. If I call, if I leave something in hotel and I call and I say, hey, my daughter left her son less is there? Didn't eOne find a pair of green sunglasses? You know what? As a matter of fact, they did. We have them in the box the front desk. We'll shift them to you. That's great customer service. And and and that and that that that couple of minutes when you look for the hotel phone number and you call them and you're waiting on hold and you transfer you you have that anticipation and when they say, yeah, you know, Mr Browie, we have your charger, I'm excited. But things it's a charger versus sunglasses. That's Apples and our No, it's it's Apple and Android. But if I if I if I leave my charges somewhere, Yes, I left my charger, I should I it's unfortunate. But if somebody found it, returned it, I get it back. That's awesome. Get that. But chargers are one of those There's certain items in life that come and go that are part of our world, part of my world. I want to live in a world. I want to live in a world where people don't talk in my parking space, you prick, and people don't steal my charger. That's the world I want to live in. It don't put scallions in my Chinese food. You found it, you found it, so you found it for some earbuds. So you found Let me tell you something what I would piss me off once? Okay, this has happened to me. In Nashville, I returned my Hurts rent a car and I accidentally left a very expensive hoodie in the backseat of the car. Got home, realized, holy shit, maybe they haven't lost and found. I called into that local Hurts. They found the freaking hoodie. They was describing on the phone. It's not lost and found box. We're gonna ship it right out to you FedEx. How good did that make you feel? Bad? Because a week and a half later, the box never came. I called them back. Some other guy answered the phone. I'm like, hey man, they was posted FedEx and me and my hoodie. Could you look around? Oh yes, but underneath this pile of crap over here, let me uh, well, this is they left the Someone freaking put the hoodie in the box, but never brought it to FedEx. Okay, so then the guys like, it'll be right out to you. Three weeks later, the ship never showed up at my house. They had it, they found it, they boxed it, they never shipped it. A third guy answers the phone and tells me, I'm sorry, we don't have that. I'm new here. Can you ask your staff? I had them on the phone for forty five minutes searching for high and low for that freaking unmeiled fed xbox. They've lost it gone. There's the difference between me and you, And I said, you know what, fuck it. I'm gonna some way, somehow, that's gonna come back to me, dividends in spades, whatever you call it. And then we gotta wrap this thing. Stupid people at this hurts. Rent the car and Nash is the last thing I'm gonna say. And then we're gonna wrap this pet podcast up. Man, we've been going. I would have called a regional manager and I would have gotten a credit at Avis for renting a car, or I would add credit hurts. No, I would have gone Avis or Enterprise, but I would have gotten a refund, or would have them send me a gift card or would have them send me a visa, check card or something. They owe you that money once they have ownership of it. Admit it. It's that that they have your property, had it and they lost it, or they stole it and they never shipped it and they promised you they would. You should have gotten retribution, my friend, and you didn't. So you're a sucker and that's what you get. And someone stole your charger, you're a sucker. So next time you put a charger in there, I'm gonna take your charge and I'm gonna sell it and you're not gonna care because you don't care. Someone stole my freaking charger. Look at this. You know what. I got my new charger two days Amazon Prime. I love you Amazon Prime. And what I'm gonna find I'm gonna go to a hotel check in. I'm gonna find somebody else's charger. Your replace your twenty dollar charge with a hundred and fifty all hotel room. You gotta get out of here. Thanks for listening to all of us. Review us on Apple iTunes. We need to be reviewed. Yeah, review us because we're from Brooklyn Boys. Brooklyn Brookland Boys