#37: Kissing Cousins and Rants by The Dozens

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Speaker 1: Start uf dot up, start up, Brooklyn Boys, start up, Brooklyn Boys start data. They're making noise data dot up, episode thirty seven. We actually looked it up that time. It's the Brooklyn Boys podcast. We're already getting hour is possible? Is our text message number? Well? For the Elvis Strand show, we don't have a texts well, we be right, we don't have one, but the radio show does. And people decide to, you know, to text us after hours two all minutes already hash tag what's up? Brooklyn Boys? Can't wait for the Brooken Boys podcast. They started with hashtag what's up? Waiting for another one? No, no, this, then this person? Yeah, bring it. I know what it says already hashtag brody and scary. All right, it's getting momentum. All right, fine, it's all right you Danielle. We don't even have this morning on the Big Show. She said scary and Brodie twice. She didn't say it like she said she so scary and Brodie, which means she was unprompted. She wasn't thinking about it, and I was first in mind, and she was looking at you because you were on the mic where you are now running the podcast and uh, we once again on today's fifteen minute morning show, and what's today's date? Today is the twenty six, that's when we're recording right um. On the Elvastrand Morning Show fifty minute Morning Show, we again talked about how you made up with your cousin that the first girl you ever kiss. Why are you so fascinated on the I because it's hilarious. Do you have the clip? I got it? I don't, don't. Let's let's get to it in a minute. I want to make by the way we said that last episode, and then we definitely get to so I have. I've this was a rough week and a half because I have all the things I wanted a bitch about from last week we didn't get to and I have all the things this week, so I already see this stuff. I got bumped on that aneurysm. Next week? What are we doing next week? Going on the cruise? Well, yeah, we got some we got some rough sees ahead, no pun intended, no pun intended. Yeah, we've got three cruises. Well, we have two cruises and a flight to a ship that we're not getting on. So we're gonna be on a Norwegian cruise sponsor. Right, I'm just saying no, No, I'm telling you it's a sponse. I'm not slipping it in. We're going on a Norwegian cruise, uh next weekend in New York. Then you and I and Nate and a couple of the people are going to la for on the same ship, the Bliss, and then we'll fly to Seattle, Chris and the Bliss. I'm going on a fourth one because now you're going to Miami. I'm sailing again. Yea on a cruise, you have four it's a lot. Yeah. Um okay, So I want to make a promise right here at the beginning of the po we are not going to read thirty email today. I don't think we're gonna get to any We're not going to read Grammar Police signs. Although we had a lot of really good ones, so many great ones. Yeah, I feel like, let's save him for next week. I feel like wearing our Instagram, which is a frozen, hostile waste land, but you're running it. I think we should. I think we should turn our Instagram into the Grammar Police. Just put up what people send us. Yeah, because if you think about it, it's visual. Most of them are visual, right, but then people are sending them on Instagram, but they're also sending them on Twitter. You have to go back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. I don't have that kind of time. Yeah. Um, a lot of kids walking around today. It is bring your kid to work day. I didn't remember. I didn't bring any of my kids. That was my next question, where are your kids? Bro? They're on school? Are they here? First of all, you could just say kids. First of all, I completely forgot. Well I shouldn't say forgot. That had no clue. It was bringing your kids to work day. And my kids are over it at this point. They've seen it. Yeah they And besides, uh, it was a slow show today, so for them, it's like go hang out on the radio station. Yeah, it was somebody up here, Like if logic comes up, my one of my daughters will be here in a heartbeat. They're waving to us, yeah high. That's what kids do. They wave hi guys like we're on a cruise ship. So they don't really know who we are or care about us. No, they just they just see people in a room with microphones and headphones on. And I see a lot of lights and colors and this person is taking your pictures right weird? Hi guys, Yeah, alright, so it's fine, but what we do here but anyway, so it is bring your son or door to work. But I wanted to know what it was like when you used to bring your kid to work, when it first, when the first thing of the first time you did. Oh, they thought it was great. They put headphones on, they sat in front of the microphones, took pictures. Their friends thought it was cool. Now not so much. All yeah, I don't have any kids. I don't have a story for you. All right. I had I had, Oh, I just I just I had something in my head. I wanted to mention two things that I'm upset with you about. One of them not upset with because you always do something that's we got the strawberry thing blew up in your face. Everybody took my side. You want the strawberries on a steak? Well, listen, this is the after, this is after the big show. So we I need to just tell you something, Brodie. Um, I'm going I'm going to go to the website and I'm gonna buy you some more strawberries. I'm gonna buy you a box. But in all fairness, thinking back to that day, if I really think back, you know, you're tapping your foot like you can about have fumes coming out of your get upset when I don't think you told me that it was for your family until after five strawberries were gone from the box. I I immediately told you, I said, those are strawberries in the box. I'm bringing them home. Maybe and daniel heard you. We already covered this, but maybe I didn't know at the time, and I thought about it, and I don't know, it didn't register. I didn't think about it. Sorry, you think I would maliciously take strawberries away from me? I think you just said it. You don't think about it. You just you just go it's real good. I don't think that Elvis is cookies. I don't think I heard on the on the Big Show? Is it the Big Show this morning? Right? So, so if you didn't hear the clip this morning on the Big Show. On the Elvis Strand Show, Elvis revisited the strawberry conversation because he heard rumor that it was a great debate. Danielle told him, Oh, it's hilarious, and uh so we reenacted it basically the air. We retold the story and I added to it because since that fiasco, people are crushing the crushed me right, uh big. Eric Wellman from our rock station next door Q four three came by for cookies, just a short story of it. Came by for Tate's cookies sponsor, and he didn't like the assortment that was in the studio, the bags that were open for his wife. His wife wanted the regular, basic, the standard flavor, right, the classic. So you said, oh, Elvis has a case in his office, and you took Eric to Elvis's office where Elvis wasn't here. He went over the day and you gave him cookies from Elvis because he didn't want orange and we didn't want like toasted coconut gluten free. But you, Brody strawberried his cookies. You gave Elvis's cookies away. So don't make excuses that I didn't say the right thing or I did. You did the same thing to Elvis two days later. I call them community cookies. They come for everybody. We're all, we all take part in the commercials. Hey, you know what if if you see scaryes car, it's a community car. Just chopping and I'm giving you permission. Scary and I are like co workers, were co hosts. Take his car, go for a rock. You know what, the weather is getting nice here in the Northeast. It's a convertible. Drop that top down, drop that top. Oh, and then you know what, while you're driving in it, try to put the top up while the cars moving and see what happens. That's not gonna be good. Catch the wind, the whole thing fly off. Uh. So this happened to my parents. They had a kid that hit couldn't stand. Yeah, his name is Stephen. It's young brother. Um, there was this junk car that was parked two doors down. All right, I know what you're doing here. I know you are making this the uh the recycling bullet container of topics. You tried this topic on the Elvis Durrant show. Elvis gave you a dirty look and he made He told you not to say it on the air. You pitched it and he's like, no, you're not saying that on the air. You told the whole story. He lets you get to the end of the story and he stopped. You can we make this less about ranking on me? And I'm saying I know what you do, and I see what you're doing. Your mommy daddying it. Elvis said, no, by the Elvis is the mommy in this story, and you're daddying it. You're like, oh, Brody, listen, you do with the unused punchlines every freaking show. That's because Elvis made a terrible mistake. Okay, when that then he made a terrible mistake. Well, what I'm saying is a lot of the stuff that we talked about on this podcast are things that get rejected from the big show. And Elvis even tells us, He instructs us do it on your podcast, and we love this time and we like, gladly. I'll tell you what this story you're about to tell, it's not really a story. It's just not it's a it's an anecdote before you tell the story, once you hear the story. Junked Car tweet us junk car, hashtag respect, hashtag reject. So should Scary have told this story and Elvis was wrong? Or should he not have told you? Now you're making it to be a bigger story than it really is. It's really just a quick thing. No, you want me to tell the story, I already know. No, I just I'm just saying I think it's had a junk car parked in front of the house three doors away to three doors away, three doors down, three doors down, just like the rock group three doors down. It was like kryptonite to them. When you park in on a city street, people fight for parking. So this car was sitting there for weeks and weeks and weeks kept getting tickets, you know, alternate side of the street. Tickets kept coming by, just stacking up tickets. They later come to find out when the car was finally towed, that it belonged to the people in front of that house, the house that it turned. The people were mental, the people why would they put a junk car in front of the house because it was their junked car and the sign said car does not move, And it was be cause they wanted the spot in front of the house for that car. I understand that actually was a car that moved. The sign the window says cast there was a fake sign. It was a fake sign. And then and they would just wanted it as up. They wanted a place for their car that they never drove, so they left it in front of their house, and they were freaking out about other people parking in front of their house. So I'm just saying, what length, especially in the neighborhood we grew up in, would people go through people spot, people would put red cones. They would steal them from the gas company, and they would put the cones out, and then they would put their couch like they were throwing the couch out right. They would leave it in the street and then they would move the couch. No one's gonna no one's gonna stop their car, park it and move a move a couch and then repark their car. By the way, you said, come to find out, that is a very not New York expression. And I'm wondering where you got that from. I picked it up here because the New York and just go they found out, they found out what the found out not they can come to find out. That's a very non New York then. Anyway, I'm just saying, it's not you. I don't know who you are anymore. Have you ever stood in in somebody's space? Yes, yes, I've been asked to, well, not somebody's space, but I've stood in the parking yes, by standing in it. Yes, I've gotten yelled that curse that get the hell out of the spot. Yeah. I don't think people have a right to do that. I think I don't think you can hold a spot at all, even like, oh, he's just going on the block. That's too bad to get out of the store. You're not here, my car's here. You're not a car. I I have pulled into spots with someone standing there. You've done that. Yes, you've done that. You've gone into it like a mall parking lot. Somebody was standing in the spot. Give a ship, how do you do? How do you do that without running them over? I I yeah, I give him the look, and I go, well, first of all, if they're not bigger than me, then I go, I don't give a ship. I make sure they hear it or see my mouth. And I pulled right in. But the second you start with the confrontation, aren't you the least bit afraid that once you finally leave your car, they're gonna come back and keep it. No, so I'll give you a caveat. When I had a very old Dodge Dart, very old, I didn't care, so I would I would bump into people deliberately. I would push them, you know, like I push a car out of a spot back in the day. Now you physically push your car. Yeah, I would like I would shove a car like if it needed Like if if the car in front of me had a lot of room in front of it and I I was tighten my space, I would slowly touch bumpers. Is this car had bumper guards? Google that, But there were a big rubber of things in front of your car, so you wouldn't scratch the car in front of you, and I just you know, nudge the car up a little bit and then back up. So there was a space that was it. I wouldn't do that in my car. Now. Well, if you park like an asshole, then you should. You should, really you deserve you get what's coming to you. If you park diagonal, you park over the lines in aligned space, or if you if you're parking parallel and you you taked up too much space, and like you like, you know what, I don't want people to squeeze in front of the back of me, So I'm gonna go equally distant between the front and the back. Is you can't prove that because the people in front of them are behind them, could have moved? Could have you not? You could always want to know who tried that. Today, my Walkers and Talkers co host Jamie we had do we We had her on the Big Show this week. She was fantastic. The horrible dates she's had for States the past couple of weeks. So she has um New York Press plates so she can park buy our building in the area that says New York Press only. So Greg T was downstairs, Greg T from our show you everyone, Greg Greg was downstairs and uh he was out smoking because he doesn't smoke, but he was down there. Let's say he was pretending to smoke and he saw her car and the police were about the Tohr brought me a translation about the tower and there's a policeman like waiving the h toe chuckle. Well, so he sees it and he goes, oh, officer, that's my friend's car. What are you doing? And so so, uh he's the officer says, she's up on the bumper of the car in front of her right so so so he says, well, how do you know they didn't back into her? And the officer goes, because that's a police department car. And I parked out there last night and then like, you can't argue with that, you can't. So what happened? He ran and got her and she moved the car and they were good. Didn't They didn't take her? So you can get a ticket for that? Uh? Up on a bumper? Yeah? Because yeah, well listen, they can tell you with that. Listen, that's like getting a ticket for parking too far from the curb. You don't get tickets for that. Well, yeah, you do, you do. It depends how far from the curb you come with a ruler? Was a measuring tape? Oh, the tire is seventeen inches away? Okay, If the rule is like fourteen inches whatever, the rule is twelve you don't have Texas. I don't care that much. But if the rule is fourteen inches and you're twenty inches you're sticking out into the street. That's a dumb parking ticket. You gotta be like twenty ft from the hydrant, you know, the fire hydrant. New Sunday mornings, no one's up. I'm cheating, okay, but if the fire department shows up that no one's up. If I'm going to brunch on a Sunday when the parking rules are not. As long as it's brunched, then you're fine. Well that's what that's the time that I do have a brunch Sunday morning. There's a I park try and squeeze my car, and I'm like, yeah, that's good. That's enough feet away from the hydrant. I'm okay, I'm okay here I can't. I mean, they can get to it. And as long as I'm not blocking the hydrant, we'll see the fire truck doesn't pull into the spot. They're gonna double park anyway and run. You need room for a hose to get in there and a guy to run by the two guys. I'll give you two guys, two guys, guy on each side of the hose. You don't need twelve feet. They don't unless the big I mean that big firefight. And then they then some people decided to put the yellow line. They start painting a yellow line. It's like the yellow line. No, no, no, I'm not paying to the attention to the yellow line because you how do I know that you didn't measure it properly when you decided to make the yellow line. Okay, A couple of things on the yellow line First of all, I want to backtrack. If you're a firefighter, we're just being facetious. You don't have to say, well, I don't need you to text this the legalities of it. I no, no, no, I just I don't want people to get upset and like on the firefighter this reason. I'm sure there's reason we're joking. But as far as the yellow line goes, okay, there are people in our old neighborhood that would paint yellow lines and to their own their own uh house, their own to family house, so people wouldn't park there, and then they would park there, and then one would get it. They wouldn't get a ticket because they knew the yellow loonge was fake. They would paint it like a slightly different shaded yellow, so the city knew it wasn't real. And then they go, I didn't paint it. I have no idea. Or they would break their own curb and make a curb there when there wasn't a curb like the like an indent like a driveway, but there was no driveway like like. They would put it there, but the only thing on the other side of it was like an alleyway and some garbage they would break their own curb, and then they would always have a spot every day they would park in front of their own curb, right, because they're not getting a ticket for and no one else is gonna park because you know, you don't get a ticket for park in front of a driveway unless the person who owns the house reports you. Oh really, yeah, well how would they How would the transportation for the ticket person, how would they know it wasn't your driveway? They wouldn't. You're allowed to park in front of yours? Got a ticket in front of in my own driveway in Brooklyn, then you're an idiot. No, I'm not. I was. We we tried. It was Christmas and we were stacking cars in the driveway, like one on top of the other. Yeah, vertically, vertically so no, no, no. We we butted one car up to the garage. Then we got one car in the driveway and then the car behind. So it was like, were you blocking the sidewalk? No? Yeah, yeah I was. Yeah, you were blocking the sidewalk. So half your car was north of the sidewalk, right, ther bottom half was, but the back of the car was not in the middle of the street. But you're blocking the sidewalk. You left that pot out. The middle of your car was blocking the side. We left a little space so people could walk in between the two cars in front. Not that, not if it was two firefighters. Again joking, I'm just saying, you can't do that. Do you leave details out? Oh? I wasn't. I wasn't. Yeah you were. Have you ever pulled one of those things where you grabbed an empty garbage can flipped it upside down over over a fire hydrant and of that. No, that's people's lives at risk. I assume you did. I never did. My friends did my friend Okay or did because he was you know, you know is his last initial l Okay. I went to camp day camp with a kid named Aggie, right. We called Aggie Doggie. Right. I didn't call him that, but that this was that's what That's what you would say. I didn't call him that, but everybody else did anyway. So we used to play softball at camp. We were like eight or nine years old. I had my my I brought my own wooden baseball bat because I was like, you know, when he's my own bat. I was eight, I wanted my own bat, nine ten, whatever, I was, and he struck out. He took my bat and he flung it against the backstop, the metal fence that goes around the homeplate area, and broke my bat. Now, at the time ago, I think the bat was five dollars, So I said no, I said, hey, man, you only five dollars, No problem, I'll ask my mom. I'll bring it in tomorrow. That was my whole life ago, that son of a bitch till those five dollars. I found him on Facebook. Found on Facebook. Hit him up for the well, like, I made a joke. I said, Hey, how's it going. Hey, you know last time I saw you, you wanted me five dollars from my bat. And he was like, ha, that's funny. I remember that. You know what if he was if he was going to go along with the joke, would be a good sport. He would well with interest. It's like, you know a lot of money, that's funny. But I never Yeah, So yeah, f you, Aggie, Yeah, add that to the F you list. Good luck, my friend Augie. He spelled it a U G I E. That's how he spelled it. AGI. What is that even short for august Augustine? Augustine Augustus Augustus Augustus group. Well, anyway, Augie was Aggie was the one who used to flip garbage pails over. That's put them over over fire. I'll tell you what else people did parking meters when they were still parking meters and there wasn't the muni machine where you put the money and put like actual turn the knob parking meters. If they're broken, people would put a bag over them, like any kind of little plastic bag in the supermarket, and tie it so it would look broken. So if you parked at it, they couldn't give you a ticket because it was broken. So people started put in your own bags on them. And then you go, oh, yeah, of sir, I don't know, look like it's broken. One was untied the bag because if if the if the if the if the Department of Transportation people right the dots. If they put the bag on it, you take it off, that's a that's a problem. So I just go and looked broken to me. Also, people would steal the heads off the meters. They would take a sledgehammer and knock them off. So you just have them. You just have the pole there right now, hold on a second, technically you're not paying for the parking space, they can ticket you. Well, yes, I learned that because I got a ticket for parking at a poll and I I said, there's a poll there, where am I gonna put the quarter? So they said, well you shouldn't park there? That was the only spot. Yeah, I don't know how I feel about that? What what? What about what my friends used to actually take, uh you know when again parking meters with coins. They used to take a foreign coin and jam it in there. And it's like, oh, I'm sorry, you can't ticket me. Because there's needs to be able to buy slugs from peoples. The slug is like a blank coin and it's the same size as a quarter. So for video games, alright, you go to the arcade games, you get a bag of slugs and you just drop them in and you put them in the register like a quarter because the sensor which was just went by, it was the same weight and size. And you brought a bag of slugs for five bucks, and uh, the slug guy made some made his money roller slug half the price of a roller quarters. It was like five bucks. Hey, you know you know a slug guy, I got a guy. You give you a bag of slugs. Can you go to the arcade play games all days in the meter? Yeah. And then but you had to have a story because like if you if your coin got stuck, then you have to call the attendant over and they go, they open it up and your slug was there. You go, how did that get in my pocket? I put a quarter in there? That's crazy. When I worked at chuck E Cheese, people used to have slugs. Oh, you you must have found so many. Oh is that why you guys branded your own coins so they had that. I was always the Rucky Cheese always had their own coins. Oh, they would have the fakes, the slugs for the coins for the Yeah. Well, Chucky Tea was a big deal and that was like your big arcade in town. Then you needed a Chucky Tea slug guy. You gotta you got you got game token guy, Game token guy. Got a guy, Game token Game token guy. Yeah, game token guy. Oh, we needed I needed you free dessert back then, because some of the arcades back in the day, you would actually put your quarters in for tokens and you put I'm sorry, you put your dollar in for tokens and you only get three tokens, so they were charging more than scam. That wass you only get three games for dollars. But whereas if they kept it as all quarters and you put the quarter right in the machine and your machine accepted quarters, you get four quarters cents a game. But no, you have to change it converted to tokens, and that it was not thirty three and the third cent for that's that was awful. I needed Brody on my side. Well, then we can do that's the rule. The rules. The rule. They used to be four token it's for a dollar. But the reason they did that was because if you got the four tokens, you have to spend them all. You've got change of a dollar. You might leave with fifty cents in your pocket. But it's like casinos, you're gambling with fake money. Doesn't matter, you know what I mean. Oh, by the way, that's Pal Spruce outside, Spruce, my friend Spruce, not my man, not Mobro, that's Spruce. Oh you know what, I wanted to come in here. I feel like he's stopping by on purpose. I'll tell you what he kind of knows. When we do this podcast, I want Spruce to come in because he is a witness. I love Spruce. He's a witness. I gotta let him in the door. What what what is the witness to? Oh, he's a witness to a special surprise that we are going to have for the Elvis Rand Morning Show next week. Really and then a surprise for this podcast it has on the Big Show. Is it a guest? No? No? And Spruce is a witness to it. So I want I want to bring him in he real quick. It looks like you can't get in. Hold on, do they like lock him out? Why doesn't he have key card access? Do they not trust him? What's his deal? What are you talking about? Spruce? Well, want to know. I'm like, hey, have to sit down, man, I just want to know what the deal is here. Because they don't give you a key card access to our studios. What's up with that? Okay, before you answer that question, he says, is that because they don't they don't want him in? Yeah? Well why don't they want you in here? You should have access? Uh here? Right? Yeah? Why I can get in this main door? Right? But I can't? All right? So please, uh no details, okay, Okay, I just want you to confirm on a scale of one to tend because you were there. Yes, I was the surprise thing that we recorded yesterday in the comedy studios, yet not gonna play it today. So, by the way, that persons in the studio right now, she's the best. Yeah, the girl my favorite of all of our singers that we have on when people say who's sang that song? Who's saying that song? Uh? Blair? No, just that's her name, Blair Blair. She is my favorite of all of our singers really because can she sing live for us on the podcast one day? Yeah? You know what I'll do if you want, well, next week, we'll play the masterpiece that I created yesterday. You have to admit, I mean it was a hit. Do you want me to bring Blair over here? Finished? Not today because I wanted to sing the present live. I'll have the lyrics, and but not today because I wanted to debut on the morning. I feel like if I debuted here then the listeners would demand Elvis play it. But here's what I want you to do. I want you to demand Elvis play the New Brody parody next week, the week of the twenties ninth. By the way, Is she the one who's sang him and me? Yeah, that's Blair. Yeah, she played the part of Halsey. Yeah, yeah, okay, good. She's a good singer. She's a great girl. She's a Hoboken She has her own band, Blair Ryan Hard band. I don't know if she wanted that mention, but okay, I'm sure she does. Yeah, okay, she is fantastic. Could use this extra scratch. He's not a great singer, but she's fun. I give her characters to do, like I'll say, sing drunk or sing with an accent. I'll say like I need you to be annoyed in this song, and she really gets it good. But this one, this one, boy. You know, there's some people that I know, you guys are doing your thing, but I'll get out, you know, have to. Would you know there are some people that are really good singers, but they're not good parody singers and they can't take direction. Right, Okay, this is my biggest complaint for the longest time with By and okay it comes the word Grammy. Go ahead, al right, every every every artist that in the past, by the way, just to let the audience know when we do a parody song. This is what they're talking about. When we do fake songs, they're supposed to be comedic and caricatures. You know, like when you go to a carnival or a bar mitzvah or whatever they have, the person who draws draws draws you, and you're in a cartoonish fig You're like overaccentuated head and understand. Okay, that's what a parody song and a parody singer is supposed to do. Not necessarily yes, because I'm doing a Britty Spears parodysed by No. No. If I'm doing a song parody, let's say, ten years ago about Brittany being drunk or shaving her head and I wanted to sound crazy, then the singer is gonna sound crazy. But if I'm doing one of my most famous parodies back in the day, Uh, make my boobies one more size, where it's supposed to sound like Brittany singing with different words. You wanted it to sound just like Brittany, Yes, but we also want a little bit more of it. Was that there was a national hit. You wanted an exaggerated Brittany anyway, No, but the joke wasn't the exaggeration. The joke was that she was singing when when everyone thought she had breast implants back in when the lyrics were make my boobies one more size, by the way, you know that song that was me. I wrote that we should play a long time, and I'm going to play that. But um, it was supposed to sound like Brittany, not supposed telling like it over the top Britney problem or drunk. You have a lot of problems. Everybody comes in here and they want to I'm gonna say it. They all wanted they all want to be winning a Grammy. They want to be up for Grammy because they they they take themselves too seriously, not all of them. Some of them come in, they'll do their session. They're they're there whatever you guys are doing and whatever you're trying to parody. And they're trying to go for the gold, not go for the gust. They're not going for the humor of the comedy. They're going to hold on. But we are the ones that I work with when we're doing something for me and I'm there or Spruce is there, we produce them. So I'll say, can you do that line again? Like this? The song that You're gonna here next week on episode thirty eight. Okay, there were certain inflections I wanted, and I said, no, do it with more angst, do it more discussed, Do with more like say over there, not not over there, like over there, like I explain exactly how I want. And with all due respect to those singers, I understand what you're saying, scary. But over the years, what Broody and I have also done as far as picking singers is try to pick singers that know exactly what we want and not get the ones that are going for the grammar makes you great producers. That's what we try to do, and it's pretty interesting. Like we've had some people I won't say her name, but an incredible singer speaking of Grammys, did most a very If I said her name and two and two of the songs that she's she's so if I said three words, yeah, three words, it's thought a certain song that's a hit. Yeah, I know, I know the three words. What's the matter with that? Yeah? Okay? Yeah. What I'm saying about her is she's not a good parody singer. A great singer she is. But if you need a wire or over the top or you wanted to sound like, uh, just like Whitney Houston or Mariah Carey or whoever, or Aretha Franklin. She's unbelievable. So if you write a song like sometimes you write in Aretha Franklin song right, read the Franklin sings, is it change change chain right? If you want to sing about Dick Cheney, which we did back in it wasn't about the joke. It was about change Chaine Cheney. Janey's a fool. Back to your point, it goes back to sounding as The point was to make it sound like Area Franklin song. The joke wasn't on the singer. I'm just saying you're a novice. I get it. You don'tunderstand right, We're like Farrel, don't play at all. I wanted to get the back story. So this song in Britney Spears had broken her leg. Turn it off for a second. Dude had broken her leg and she was out of the public eye for a while. When she came back, she did a performance in a white stop it in a white tank top, no like a white turtleneck, and her breast looked five times the size they used to be. Everybody thought she faked the broken legs so that she could have breast implant surgery, and then and then people while she was away recovering from a broken ankle. So I took hit me Baby one more time, made it make my boovies one more size. This singer who is still singing with us nineteen years later. She sang with Pink, She sang with the Fuji's. She's a very talented. La sang with Lauren Hill. How Bob movie. My chest was a hugs good ground. My cleavage wasn't right, my boobies, boobies, My breasts are complained, and now my sweater sidey surgery. I want to be a d bigger memories. I want them to show now no beat up podcast. Flatness was killing me, and I must confess I paid fo thees I love thirty two. I'm just a child, I am a crow. Make my boobies one more Okay that in that regard, Yes, I'm talking about that needed somebody who sounded. Now a couple of things. That song. How long is that song? That song parody? Yeah, two and a half minutes. We would never play a two anf minute song parody. Now, Also, when that that song was so the internet would sort of got bigger, so people uh back in the day would make websites and post lyrics because they weren't lyric websites, and every single person who put the lyrics up to that song got the exact same lines wrong, and so um, I think uh one of the lines was that that my breasts are completely foe. I was getting artsie back then, like breasts are completely fall meaning fake f a u X, And every website was putting my breasts are completely full f u l L, which isn't fun that make any sense anyway. The point is, and weird Al got credit for it. If you if you remember Napster when you used to download bootlegs, that song was listed as a weird Al song. Well, any website that said that song right, it's He's not weird Al's not writing songs for a girl to sing. That was me. One guy, This is great. You can find this online somewhere. It's all over YouTube. And the guy didn't didn't pay me for it, but he gave me credit by the bigger, bigger spears. Yes, right, we used to come up with spoof names. So a guy took Japanese animation anime and found scenes that matched every lyric of my parody, so it looked like it was a video. So like when I said, like my breast screw, I had surgery, and they had like a clip of a girl and just having surgery. Oh yeah, it's on YouTube Japanese animation. And then uh, Combo number five maybe my another one of my all time national No, no, I mean we can somebody animated that as well and didn't get a credit and had had a track. Then down Combo number five. I just don't want to keep too many. Let's say it for next week. I don't want to make this about Dr Davis doing Spruce. What were we saying? Spruce? Dr Davis is the voice Combo number five. He's are he runs the comedy department? Yeah yeah, alright, good. Anyway, So I've been doing this since I was in school, but since I was in junior high school writing song pack. But they've only been paying me for a long time now, and Spruce and I have been working together, and you know, but he and I don't feel bad for him. But no, but listen how long yesterday that song that you guys are gonna hear an episode thirty eight. It was an over an hour to record it. You guys are like Lennon McCartney. Yeah, I'm Lennon, He's McCartney. Cartney had the better fame. I don't know about that icon. They're both icons. But Lennon was killed the nine eight. You can say I was making a brody scary let the cart and joke. Nobody's shooting anybody? All good? All right, Look, I'm gonna leave you cats because you're both beautiful. All right, I'll see I'm working from Homeptown. I'll see later or I won't. Rather a right little little David Brody history that that song was one of the reasons I probably got hired, as I was working freelance back then. Now, I, um, do we want to play this audio for there like three minutes of audio from our past? Do? And I also want to play the clip from CNN, which you want to do first. Let's do the clip, all right? So I'm listening, uh what's today? Whatever the day is a couple of days ago, I'm in the car listening to satellite radio because they had the cable news channels not flipping around, and I end up on CNN and Wolf Blitzer who's a you know, admittedly a little a little older, a little lot of touch and uh, you know, not not hanging with the kids like we are. And he's got a reporter on who's talking about And again, this is not us getting political, it's just it's funny. So she's talking about how Emmanuel Macral, the president of France, is trying to convince Donald Trump, President Trump, to change his opinion on things. And she says it's gonna he's he's trying to get Trump to change his opinion on two things right now. Do you remember we may have it in the system when Rick Perry was running for president in two thousand and twelve and he's like, if I get elected this four branches of government, I'm gonna get rid of a second, there's only three branches of government. No, no, no, the departments agencies to good government agencies. That's it. Four government agencies I want to get rid of. And he he listed one to three and he went uh and um uh and the fourth one, um, I can't think of it. And then he looked at the camera went oops, and that was any he couldn't think of it. So she does the same thing. So I want to to hear what she's thoughts, saying what she says, how they react to it, and then I'll explain what happened trying to vince Trump to two major things that Trump doesn't want to do when it comes to Syria, involved in Syria and staying in Syria when the president wants to bring the United States out um and then um. Also the other thing was and I'm having a brain fart right there, Um Syria, well run and then just um the underground. So she says, she says, uh, you know, one is of course, staying in Syria, and the other is um, uh, it's trade. And then it's uh, she was, I'm having a brain fart. She was, I'm having a brain fart now now Andrew Miller, Andrew Mitchell, who's you know, probably in her fifties maybe, and and wolf Blitzers in the sixties. They had a look on their faces like, oh, did you just say brain fart? And then she's like, oh, wait a minute, I was it was Syria, youa, it was trade. And she's trying to get herselfter and so they're like trying to help her, going, uh, the president, You're trying to say, uh, and wolves like brainfall. Uh, they just beside themselves. But come on, you can't be on on a network cable news station and go oops, I had a brain fart. It happens to the best of us, and it happens, but you can't say it. You can't say you're gonnay. That's where I disagree with you. I take issue. I think you should be as real and honest and transparent as possible. And she was in the moment and she was having a brain fart, So why would she not make that admission? Don't you in a professional environment. You're supposed to be a trusted news source, You're you're a news person. But it humanizes her, it makes her human. Okay, I disagree with you on this one. You can't say I had a brain fart. You can can't you did You're supposed to be someone with knowledge. Did she get fired for it? What? No? She probably is going to take a week off before they put her aspeck on the You can't say that at a brain fart. Let's not listen. If it's become part of it's become part of our language, It's okay. If Elvis says he had a brain fart. That's fine. We do a dopey morning show. This is news, regardless of which cable news station you would. She's an anchor. No, he was like an expert to come on. Contributor. That's fine, she's not. Then Blitzer said it, this is what he'd say, breaking news story. We're following breaking news. I had for being too hard on. He's a contributor, she's doing editorial. She's not a news person. She's not. So you had one job, right, name two things. That's why did you come on the show. You came on to talk about two things that President Mahla wants President Trump's to change his mind on two things. One one keep the troops in Syria and two. Um uh look, Rick Perry couldn't name four things, and they ran him out of the office, ran him out of the the camp pyne. Two things. You're a drill sergeant, would never want to be your son. Okay, you know what Number one? You're an asshole? Number two? Um exactly, Yeah, always going for the joke. David Brodie, Yeah, speaking of speaking of you being an asshole, you have to me this week and not did you have me? Okay, coming off the heels of you giving away my strawberries. You you have a client. Okay, it's not not an endorsement. It's not a it's not a slipping Fresh Direct is one of your clients, is correct? They're a fabulous company that delivers groceries. Okay, I know you do. You're a fan of as long before you you did endorsements for them. Okay. They had the CEO, the CMO and a bunch of big people in suits that came here to later. You know what cemost dance for chief marketing officer. You're quizzing me now. I sometimes people use initials. I don't know what they stand for, just asking. There's people know CEO and CFO and all right, see next time. Next time the initials come up. Quiz keep was in me? All pos they point of it's it's a system that they used in the hospitality industry, right point of speaking, speaking of initials. Last night on Hold on a second, last night on Full Frontal with Samantha B. Love that shout out Samantha by shout out Miles khn I love one of the writers. She was interviewing pret Berrara, who used to be um. I want to say the Attorney General of New York. He's one of the big top law guys that he was let go, shall we say, by the current administration. Anyway, she was interviewing him and he's he's formed a new organization. It was something like UM the Department of Truth Finding, right, something like that. Something, It doesn't matter what it stood for. So he says, she she's what do you what is it? So he says, I'm working for a new new organization DTF. And so she's yeah. So she says, you you work for DTF. So he goes, yeah. So she's so Samantha By says, do you have teenage kids? You have kids, young kids? Yeah, you have teenage kids. He goes. She's like, go home and tell them that you are part of the DT. We were just you and I were just in the hallway talking to a friend of ours talking about um UM A convention, the IBS convention. Right, it's the Intercollegiate Broadcasts Society belief, but it also stands for all syndrome. But that's how I remember it. So they were smart in naming it that, right. I don't know if that's yeah, the shitty name that gives it. We were sidetracked again. We're just talking about Oh, so your clients a frustration. Yeah, so we had big muckety MUCKs cmo CFOs CEOs and you know, you have to go upstairs and have a presentation, right, And they they were brought in. They said, you know what, let's reproduce some of the stuff from the store here. So they brought in. Hold on, I don't want you to tell what they did. I want to tell her from my perspective and then you can backtrack. Okay. So so you go to this meeting, which I assume is just a meeting you to sales meanings all the time, I was in a big conference, right, I'm at my desk going through in turn resumes. I'm done, by the way, by the time you hear this, I'm done. I'm done too late for the summer. And so I'm sitting there for like two hours. You come down and you've got bags of groceries, bags of liquor, dude, Fresh Direct bags. By the way, it's not a paid commercial, it's not. And I said, dude, what you can on like to have them as absolutely so? So what you get all the food? And you say, you tell me this story just tell me what you told me. As far as the story of what they had upstairs, Oh yeah, you had to see it. They had they had fresh uh fresh pant maple syrup pure. They have this beautiful brand that they but let's just gorgeous fruit they have. You know, they work right directly with their farmers. And they had these nectarines and these seatless But you used the word mountains. You said mountains of groceries. There was so much food, said, so much food and wine, right my odd they had meals as the days they had brody. I swear to you, I wanted they had chicken. Looked so good. So you said to me five minute, and you said there was so much they had. The guys who worked for Fresh Direct had to pack it all up and take some of it back. Fish how to see the fish that it was an entire piece of filet. It wasn't processed crap. They work with fishmongers, they work with farmers, and they worked with ranchers directly, and it goes it skips the supermarket shelves and it goes directly to your Okay, now now I hit that jingle. You know they should You should have played the product endorsement. You're endorsing the product. You can say fifty dollars off your first order. Shut up and play that if you got a fresh directory a second. I want to save our listeners money. You can't wait till I finished my story. Damn. You go to fresh direct dot com slash slash I heart and you get fifteen hours off boom fifty bucks. I just handed fifteen. This is not a commercial, it's a podcast. I'm sorry. You owe everybody an apology. I just gave him fifty bucks. I gave everybody free deserve fair enough. How are you? Why are you persecuting? So you're just angry yet so I give you so, I give you the look like, oh, he cood have asked me to come up. But then, for a second I thought it was probably only for the people, because it was the people from all six radio stations that do commercials. You told me who the other people were. Those are people that do endorsements. It wasn't right. It wasn't open to anybody. So then I hear behind you and it's Elvis's assistant, Andrew with a big sack, and you go all. I told Andrew he should see how much stuff Andrew grabbed. That's your response to me when I said, I'll come in and tell me. You know all, I told Andrew you should see how much stuff he got. So not only didn't you ask me, but then you matter of factly tell me about Andrew how you told somebody else because l Andrew represents Elvis, he's he's an executive assistant, and I represent Elvis. I'm his executive producer. But here's the thing, though, Elvis on behalf of Elvis, Elvis on behalf of them, behalf of Elvis. Andrew was gonna go home and eat those groceries I said. I said, Andrew up to the floor to touch grab a bag and get some stuff full ship. Here's what you did. Andrew was the closest person that you're standing there at the moment, and you didn't want to walk thirty feet into the back where I sit and tell me one more time you didn't think of me when when like the time you went and got those really cool flannel shirts from the gypsy people. Yeah, and you're like, oh, you didn't get me one right, and your girlfriend, oh go see Sevester amount of scout call. You didn't think of me? You're a prick. You're not a buddy. I always think of you. I'm your boy, You're not my boy. I'm your boy. But Andrew co host the podcast you got hit the Fresh Direct. That's terrible because I can use tangerines or tan jellos, whatever the hell they were clemon times. It was so fresh. By the way, can I just say something, there's too many damn types oranges. There's too many. Well, you got Clementine, clement oranges, cuties, uhan jellos, tangelos, panellos. I put tangello in my coffee. That's Frangellico. Really, that's what you're going with. That's you lead joke today. I don't have to check that in the pile. Hey no, so wait a second, I can. I'm gonna have the sound for next week because the studio was crowded. I want to give a shout out to somebody speaking of buh Bla b jose F, who is another one of these addresses at f l O Underscore X zero zero zero one. He sent us a clip from Archer on f X Love Archer of Dr Krieger saying we'll have the sound next week. He did it. He pulled the scar you pulled the Dr Krieger. Anyway, all I could tell you is this, the food was not rightfully yours. It was mine because I'm you told me there was so much food. And well here's what happens. Okay, So you know, do you know that time after a meeting is over and anyone listening can relate if they work in an office, you know, when they buy breakfast and they have these big power meetings and whatever. By lunch, and you know, there's that moment where the room, the conference room is emptying out. Everyone's done with the contents of the room. And then the vultures come in and then the right the vultures being everybody else up there in digital because what they do is after the conference room clears, they people, yeah, the app people. And you know what, I feel bad for them because you know, they're the app creators, did the unsung heroes. They're the unsung heroes. They have a kitchen, a full kitchen up there, stocked with stacks and stacks of snacks. Will they work long hours, working long hours to to make the app better every day? Okay, if we had snacks, though, a seventy seven would have a problem with us eating f you Ape seventy seven. So these people, by the way, someone on Instagram d m me and said, they said, oh, you left out one f you on that list we read last week. They said, f you Ape seventy seven. So I said that you mean A but she's like, yeah, but Ape fits to, so fuck you Ape seventy So so what ends up happening is the vultures go in and they grabbed the food. So I figured there'd be a time, a moment that maybe you could slip in there, or maybe maybe Andrew or whoever Andrew. Yeah, I said, Andrew, none of this spas anything. Why didn't you tell me in the conference room take a bag and fill it with stuff? Yeah, and make pick out some stuff for Brody would have been nice. I was twenty ft away. By the time I got to it was too late. Andrew came back and said that they already packed up half the stuff, and he packed up the other half. His bag was full, So you would have thought, you know what I ate Brody, strawberries. I gave away his strawberries. I'm gonna get him some groceries. Would you have had blueberries? Because they had beautif my favorite food. So the biggest sweetest blueberries I've ever scene. Stop. It's my favorite fruit, partly because they're blue and I love blue. Because I love the black berries. Not bad. They squirt juice though. So the guy that the CEO actually had dinner with the Drift school family. You know people who you know drift strawberries and ferries. I said, we want a better berry for fresh director to stop it. Stop it so they had Nobody needs to know that their gold label Drift call blackberries up there. I'm sorry you didn't get any. I'm sorry, what are you? You're tapping your pen, tapping my back because I'm so bad because there was free food there and you couldn't have so bad at you right now because there was free stuff. There was free dessert, and you didn't let me have any. You told Andrew, I'm sorry. Next time, I'll tell you first, or I'll tend when's the When's the Andrew Scary podcast? Hashtag Andrew and Scary? When's that? Okay, I'll put them first on that one too. I got a lot of rants, I got un used jokes. Let's move on, Let's play the clissa, Let's not do I'll tell you what. Let's not do email and ground police this week. No, let's want to play clip. I think it's time to do that, all right. So this is a clip from the fifteen minute Morning Show, also on Heart Radio, from I Thought a week and a half, a week ago, about a week ago, a week ago. Listen in order. Do you guys know what your lives would be like if you married the first person you ever killed? He passed away, so yeah, we would be would yeah, No, I'm sad for him. Was a cousin. I'd been married to my cousin. Your cousin she was, she was still your cousin. I didn't use tongue on your cousin. It was in Florida the West coast to Florida East Coast to Florida West coast, the northern Panhandle as opposed to the southern Panhandle. I think she did not. I think I was seven years old in it. We was just like, oh, let's kiss. Is that the only kiss you've had? It wasn't because you were in radio. I was not. I don't think that girlfriend now kisses because of that. I don't know about that. You think she only kisses because her email address. Do you think I know you guys? I know you met because of the radio, But do you think she's still with you now because of it? Yeah? You can only bush with him because of his that wallet. That's serious, that generosity, and they say, I must say, that's scary. Really is one of the most generous people you know. And he gives his time to these amazing causes, and he really is. He is a very nice person, even though I bust his balls all the time about when you're gonna, you know, make you know your girlfriend? Even though his cousin and I will look at girlfriends now we know. Was marry your girlfriend? Honey, you're not related to me. I can't marry her. I was seven years old and it was innocent, and it was there was no tongue involved. Is that supposed to be normal? Why were you kissing her? I don't know. We were like exploring and I was sex. What did you kiss? She was nine a scale of one to ten. She was robin You guys ever talked about it afterwards? No, because I don't even I barely remember it. You answered pretty quickly, I should call her up right now, and remember that the only relative you've kissed. Yes, she was, it was. It was hold on a second, if I could my memory, I'm trying to job either drunk, who could ask anymore? He was kissing his past seven and she was nine, And there was no tongue. There was nothing else beyond that, just one too many caprices. And it was in Florida, the west coast of Flora heard the boring pot right, I'm trying to where are your hands? Not my first cousin, she was like my third or fourth. You've kissed other cousins. She was related to me. I's not your last name. It was a third cousins. Now, he was a third cousin, twice removed by her parents when they saw her kissing you. I don't even know her last name. I remember her first name. Were friends with her on Facebook? No, I don't think there's the last name. Rednext game, you don't talk to your cousin just like a third or fourth couse after that? Would you? That's not that bad third or fourth. That's that's pretty far right. It took scary a long time to get to that. Are you sure it was her? Fame was him? You know what? I bet it still is? Kim. I don't know if she's alive or not. It would still be Kim though, your sister, and not your brother. Your brother, What are you talking about? It's just like a dark name. Her name was Kim, it still is Kim. Well, I don't know. I'm going to that's her names were. It's like somebody text and say, did you know Barbara Bush was a native of Queens. He couldn't changed her name, would cousin? Who cares? What? Where was it in Florida? In Pensacola? Yeah, it was Pensacola or Tallahassee. Now that's the east coast, Pensacola. I don't even know where she was from. I don't know. I was so long ago, Brodie, Anyway, why do we want to replay that again? Because I wanted to make sure that our audience, our fans, got to hear you talk about how the first kiss you ever had was with your cousin. It was innocent, There was no tongue. Okay, I will go back to that every time. Okay, when his hands involved, she said to me, no, it was just like we don't know what we were doing. She was probably like three years older than me. She might have been like I don't, by the way, I said on that tape, I was seven. I think I was nine, and she makes her twelve, your almost teenage cousin who was probably at that point like okay, still probably fertile point. So okay, so so, so the point is we've all no, we all have not. We all have not made out with cousins stupid things. And I didn't make out. It was no tongue. It was just lips on lips. We didn't know we were probably biting each other. We had no were diighting your cousins lip. We had no idea what we were doing. My good thing, you didn't know what you were doing. I wasn't trying. We were just I just curious. You are so close to saying it was just the tip. That's basically where we're at right now, Uncle Steve. There was no tongue. Steve would have whooped you down. So we didn't even like touch each other. It was is that a regret of yours? I think it was like just face to face. I don't think we were touching anywhere else. I think you don't think you were touching anywhere else. I was, oh my god, can we stop now? The cookies and lemonader outside and here here comes the dateline crow anyway, okay, can we we have to segway off this? Okay. Earlier in the podcast, we had Spruce in here. We're talking a second Jesus Christ, damn it. So. Earlier in the podcast we had Spruce in here. We talked about a song parody we recorded yesterday. We talked about how the person who sang that song parody, which will be a surprise for next week, is a very talented singer. Spruce mentioned you when You're bound on, mentioned her band and her name, and we talked about this project and how funny it was. We didn't say what it was. We're not going to and then Spruce says, oh, she's here today recording, and I said, oh, maybe one day we'll have her come in and sing that particular song live, but uh, you know, let's say so she's so anyway. So her name is Brett. She's here, Blair, she's here, and he's here now sorry, she's here now, Blair's here, h and say hi Blair Hia. So Blair is my favorite song parody singer that we have on our team. And every time I need personality and humor and a character, which is what we were talking about earlier. We we call Blaren. So you're a great singer who goes for the joke and you get it. You're not trying to win a Grammy. Yes, I I have no ego when it comes to had some interesting topics. I've had, I've had poop, I've had spittle, I've had all kinds of bodily functions. Love that song and I'm okay with that. Yeah, she doesn't take it too serious. Does well? Doesn't have a Grammy? Maybe because she's singing about poop. Anyway, So this is so so anyway, So we have not We talked during the song when you're recording it, and we and I was explaining how we work on each line and inflections and different things. So without talking about what it's about or who it's about. Your thoughts on the level of humor in this project, I would I would say it's a mid to low level, uh you know, right, but funny but funny shale of funniness. It's it is way up there. You're going to be the star of this project. You're gonna be the star of this This is what we're gonna be revealing. You could say that, yeah, Blair's the singer, so next so so Blair. So it's like when said when when when when Zed works with Marion Morris and Marion Morris sings us that the song. Yeah, when she sings that, people like, oh yeah Z. But it's about Marion Marris. I mean Zed picked her and produced it, but she's the one. You can't say the same way. Mario is sitting here. He's the studio producer. Okay, so the gentle and that that records everything. He mixes it, layers the harmonies. He is the music aficionado. He knows all the parts that go into a song. He knows what we need and I drive him crazy with making sure it's mixed. Popular musical genius. He's a he's a wonderful But we work together on making sure that you hear every last letter and every s at the end of the letter, all the d's and the teas, because sometimes the word is different. Yeah, I can't like yeah, like like like like like when we did a song weeks ago where the line was French fries, but it sounds like French fry And if I can't hear this is it changes. It changed the meaning of the sentence. So I'm like, hey, I need you to bring the Z up with the Z sound at the end of fries anyway, so or if the singers there, we might have the singer recreate that line head a little more Z. So we worked it. But Mario is our pro tools master. Mario, what you've done? You do hundreds of parties a week, you you record, mix them. How did this should should our listeners be excited and prepare them cells for this thing? Yeah? No, definitely, we definitely nailed this one. Yeah, because like and just there are definitely times where you're like, wow, oh yeah this one. Uh, this one's got a lot of him. Yeah, yeah, she's gonna not want to miss. Yeah, here for the It's like you guys are doing promo for it. It's like you're on a tour right now. Yeah yeah, let's play a clip. No, we're not okay, So this is gonna be big. I wait for this parodies roughly, but every once in a while there's one I go, oh, yeah, this was that one is gonna go viral. Who says that this might not be the gram? I think this may I think I think uh I think. Yeah, they're gonna Lady Gaga come out and present the Grammy for Best Parody, and this might be the one. All right, well, I can't wait. I'm looking forward to it. I don't know nothing about it. And unlike my make My Boobies One More Size parody, which by the way, Blair did not sing. Um, it's not weird Al, I'm weird. I was not getting credibly this song either. I love weird Al, but he doesn't. Guys have have you guys know w weird Al is right? Okay, so we will play the clip. Get the clip ready, We're gonna play this, okay. So played on the podcast. No, I don't know if we have. So about three or four years ago, right, Uh, I arranged to interview weird Al here in studio, not on the big show. Um. He was doing promo for one of his albums and I think could have been Straight out of Compton. No, straight out of Linwood could have been that album. And so I I booked the interview with me and Uh Scary and our friend Ronnie. We're all from the same May but we all grew up listening to weird Al. Obviously, I have a special place in my heart fan because I now write song. But nobody listen. You can have any slebty walk through here and I don't care, like whatever you like. Icon that twelve year old boy. Yeah I'm I'm the same way with weird Owl. So the way the studio worked was I was on the main mic leading the interview. Weird Owl was directly across from me, and Ronnie and Scary were like in a V shape on either side of weird Owl. No, no, no, all right, he's on the phone that time we had him on another time in student he was on the phone, okay, And so Scary is like sitting there like, oh my god, I miss some question was so exciting and I was nervous. Okay, so so Scary. So I pointed Scary like, go ahead and ask him right, so hold on, don't play the clip yet. Scary asks him what you're about to hear? Okay, I want you to know. After it aired, the interview ended, I hit stop on the pro tools recording. I saved it, and then um I bounced it. Bouncing it means you take the digital wave file and you converted to an MP three. So I bounced it. So we had a hard a digital copy of it immediately because I knew what was going to happen immediately. Scary syt to me, Hey, delete that question, I asked him, And I'm gonna rerecord it. I'm gonna rerecord it. So he re recorded it, but I had already saved it and hit it and gave it to Ronnie to edit. So what you're about to hear didn't wasn't actually part of the interview. And he then we played it on the radio on the on the Big Show. Uh, and he was like, where'd that come from? I deleted that, they didn't delete it, and we've played this a hundred times over, I guess. But so listen to how many times, Listen how many times he hits the counter out of nervousness, and then try to figure out what the actual question is here it is, Um, this is scary. I've been listening to you and your stuff for years, love all of your stuff. Dare to be Stupid one of my favorite albums. But I got I gotta let you know that. UM. I've never been privy to the process by which you go about getting you know, permission, you know, to do a parody. Um, you know because you you know pretty much you write the what's the process? Like? Do you like the lyrics? First? And then you asked for permission because I saw you at at the airport with Iggy, I saw you at the egg Zaila thing TMZ was rolling rolling on you, guys on you, and um, you know, I just wanted to know and you know what that's all about right now. So now here's my impression of weird Al's response there. So, so weird Al comes in like six months later, and Scary's not there. He was on jury duty. And so then we missed it again. So we played the clip for Al and Al and Al is just I I remember that I didn't know what to say because what you have to say? Now? He's I still don't know what to say. And then the third that we had Alan, the third time, right, you finally got to meet and so he played the clip from that time and he just was like, I don't know what you want to know? What Scary wanted to know? This is the actual question he meant to ask, is what's the process when you're writing a parody of getting the artist to agree to it? Do you write it and submitted to them and then they approve it or do you ask, hey, I'm gonna write a parody and then once you get a well, then you write it. And he was trying to say he saw him talking about iggyaz was watching TMZ. Yeah, and TMZ was at the airport with their cameras and they ambushed him. Oh my god. They ambushed Iggy Azalea actually and asked her about the parody and said, hey, is it true you didn't give al permission like fancy exactly? It was for I'm So Fancy, which he ended up getting permission for because it's on his Anyway, he just described, did you get any of that from that clip? No, it sounded like me talking to a boy like in sixth grade. I was trying to set up to the question, and by the first time I'm actually explaining this, this question is finally being explained to the audience because we've played this on our big show like a thousand times. I was that was a set up to the question I was going to ask him, so I it out. I saw, you know, TMZ was rolling on Iggy Azalea at the airport. She was getting off her plane and they put a microphone in her face. That's not what he said. And then if you listen, then I said, so how does that How do you go about getting permission? Is it sometimes more difficult than others? Do you get denied that kind of thing? That's what I was trying to ask. Now, because this is a podcast, Okay, because this is a podcast, you can scroll back and hear that clip again. There's actually one part in the clip where he tries to fix it from a radio standpoint, knowing that we can edit it, where he says, so I saw you, I saw you like he did a pickup. We call it a pickup, where he started the sentence again even though he's talking to the mail and that was the thing. People don't realize that that was a pickup because that we were going to fix it in post. So I stammered more then you would have heard. So I did a I start, I started, and I stopped, and I started. I stopped because in my head, I'm like, I'm going to clean this up anyway. You know. Let let me and yourself in real time in front of him. Yea, if there was, if there was a video of weird al on the phone at that point, I would sell my house to get it. But he was in a studio just doing like one radiobe after another, and the dead silence after that is just it was deadly because he didn't know why, because there was no question there anyway. That being said, Blair and Blair's masterpiece that we worked on together will be on next week, hopefully on the Elvis Rand Show on Monday or Tuesday, and then be on this podcast on episode thirty eight. Do you want to plug your band, websites anything while here? Oh, that's very nice if you to ask him. In a band called Curtis and Reinhard, I'm the Blair Reinhard of Curtis and Reinhard and U. And this is one of my favorite things I get to do is singing here. People's music was here earlier. And he tried to, uh, you know, he tried to to let that out of the begging, but he was like no, no, no, no, no, Well hold on, I'll tell you what because I said, I said, I said, our singers great, and she has a band, and I was kind of hedging and din and then Spruce said it and I didn't want to speak for you. And the reason I didn't want to speak for you is that the girl who sang the Britney Spears parody back in was actually singing with professional people at the time, right, And so she did not want her name out associated because she didn't want like the artists might know Britney Spears so she's working for or people might then think that she's a parody singer. She didn't want people to know her business, so she made it a point like when people ask you who sang it, don't mention my name. Yeah, I'm totally cool. Yeah, you're in the kind you're You're you're in the kind of band though that not only plays bars, but you'll play functions. Right, you play weddings and have the Blair Reinhard band, which is a totally different thing. Weddings, private events, Google parties, lave us the trouble, spell your last name to the people know I know r E I n H a R D project. Yeah, that is how I got around in college and introduced myself to people. It was like, no one knows the name Blair. I'm Brett, I'm Brooke, I'm Claire. But if I said Blair, okay, like Blair from the Facts of Life, like Blair from The Witch project. That's the only way anybody can. I you just know you just did. We talked about this like to three episodes ago. What I do if if he meets a girl whose name is a song title, he'll he has to go, yeah, right, he'll do that. He'll he'll use the song agong lyric lyrics, dancing in my head all day every day, that's all he'll But now he does, he'll go, I know you've heard of a billion times, but you know is that your day? Like the song by so and so. Because I preface it by saying I know you get this all the time, but it doesn't help it. It doesn't help it. It's like I know you've heard this joke before. Or people will go like, okay, if we make a mistake on this podcast, we have a rule. You get, you get, Like what do we say two days? Three days? We have three day rules. Once the podcast goes live on Thursday, you've got three days to tell us we were wrong. But don't like three months later when you got around to it, go I don't know if you guys know this, but it's actually blue not Turk boys. Like at this point, we freaking no right. So but to say so. Now people are going, I know you've probably heard this already, but then don't say it you're not. We already know, we already know we're not gonna not be able to sleep tonight because you didn't tell us that it's seven not six, like we get it right? So he he doesn't. I know you've probably heard this before a hundred times. But you know your name slim Shady. You know does a song name slimy. Alright, so he just did it to you. You probably heard the million but he's a reference to a nineteen UHD movies. How about she's just Blair as in Blair. Can't I just beat me? Hey, scary, this is Mario. Hey, all right, where's your brother? We are here? Now, you got to say, I'm sure you've heard this before you intro. You probably get this all the time. Yeah, we need some walk up music from Mario to give me the stare, give me that endless stair. Why don't you all from a mushroom? Would you like some great strooms? Where's your where's yourn? Do this? Mario? Yeah, parents just wanted to get a nice little Okay, Dancing on a podcast doesn't help, just feels so good. I'm having a great time. Tell me that at one time or another in your life you had that as your ring tone. No, no, I couldn't do it. You don't embrace it too much, too much. It's too much if I embrace it. But that would be so fucking funny. It's like for everybody off, Hey Blair, do people follow you with a handheld camera and you stand in a corner staring at the wall because people fill your nose dripping thoughts, no one matter. You think about this for a second. How funny is it if you just randomly, you know, in a group of people, and you know people hadn't thought of it, and you, who hadn't thought of it on your phone goes off. People will be like the entire mall starts singing. If you don't be like, that's hilarious, his name is? If he was wearing like suspenders at the time. Oh yeah, okay, have you ever been married for a Halloween costume? No? I refuse, God damn that you're missing out of these opportunities. I refuse. I refuse. You fixed from plenty of time to fix bathrooms all the time? Aumber? No, No one's a plumber. We got nothing like it. But I've done bathroom work before and just go, hey, do your favorite. There's a there's a guy who works part time down the hall name Ralph. Go get him so scary can ask give you rexit. Okay, so last thing before and we'll let you guys go, uh, settle this because we have this debate all the time. Now, you're not Italian, but do you pronounce your name Mario or Mario? Mario Mario? I don't know if you don't hold on, I don't know if you know this, but your name is pronounced Mario. Okay, Well in this building with everybody in here from like Long Island, New Jersey, Mario, Hey, Mario, where are you from? I'm from west Chester. Way are you from west Chester or west Chester outside Philly? Because the worst Chester New York Chester one world Chester. So you're saying it's upstate New York. That's what they tell me, but it's not really Okay, So there was there was an article that came out recently. If you don't if you know, it's not Rochester, it's raw Chester. I don't want to I don't want to bore a lot of people who don't know the state of New York. But if you look at a map, New York City, where almost the majority of people in New York State live, is a little tiny little blip at the bottom of the map, right, like the little dingleberry hanging on the bottom, And then there's this massive state that goes north and west really far. So the question is when when you live in New York City, people go, oh, I love you know, you know, I live in Oneonta. To live upstate like upstate is everything else? Right? Um? But there are people who live in between really far and New York City who think that they're they live outside of New York City, live in a suburb of New York City. But if you live in New York City, like anything up there's Canada like goodbye. Right. The article came out this week of what is upstate? When you say upstate New York, where does that start? Where does that actually officially begin? And so they came up that it was, by the way, we're on here in Poughkeepsie, New York Pokeepsie, hardest town in American to spell, And well, that's because Keepsie has a train line that goes to it. It's the it's the farthest you can take one train into Manhattan. So they they've decided that that is where upstates start. That makes more if Buffalo would like to build a train that goes directly to Manhattan. Uh, you know, regular commuter train that you can be in New York City all intents and purposes. Um. I think that Upstate starts after Westchester and Rockland, the middle of the BRONX. I see, I agree with that. I just say it because everybody else says no, no after the end of west Chester. Once you get into like putting him in county Nation. Hold on National podcast. Here's what I'll say. This will make it easy for everyone understand Upstate New York. Hold on up State New York is anywhere they say Mario instead of Mario because Brody and I and Danielle and and and everyone else say it's Mario, but Elvis everyone else here. He doesn't everyone else. He means everyone else from the New York Okaya, is it Mario or Mario? Tweet us hashtag no one says Mario and Luigi it's Mario because that's what that was the franchise. I am not that dude. Is Mario as well? It's not Mario. Also, you're Hispanic, right, yeah, so is that more of a Hispanic pronunciation? I guess so. It's like I've never met I've never been a Hispanic Mario or Mario other than you, I think you ever met at all? Have you ever met an Aggie? We were complaining about aggies, like a person or dog. Do you guys have names in your life that everyone you've ever met with that name is an ass or a bit? Right? Yeah, not saying I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna say the names. But my daughter came home and she's like, I hate my supervisor at my part time job and their name is blank and this part and I every Blank I've ever met. And I said, you know what you really should in general eyes, And my wife pointed out that I know a person with that name and they are definitely a blank. And I said, so, I told my kid, I can't all go you there. You're right, but we do so Augie that I knew in the age growing up there both yea. And when he said he had a guy Aggie, he was an asshole. Again. We grew up in the same neighborhood I said it was his last and and he was like no. I was like, okay, different his parents were the assholes. Different. So we're trying to figure out. But is it age? Would you pronounce it? Aggie? Shut up? Mario? Mario fell into his trip, said right, okay, anyway, thank you Blair for stopping by. Like the Witch Project, look it up on social media. You hear the song next week and you'll know that's the genius behind it. Well, I'm the genius, bhind Har, but she's the talent. So what else we got going on? Brodie? What else is there? I don't see. How do you top that? I don't know. I'll get out on that. You want to get out? No, I we never did un use jokes and we never did uh we never did. My I got I had stuff to complain about, But well, dude, it's not my fault. Do you just run off at the mouth, you yapping NonStop? You said you wanted to be out of here forty minutes ago. You know what, I'm sorry. I'm gonna do the big PEPSI rant next week. You keep promising that I got a couple of little things. I gotta get off of my chest first, of all, I want to thank Gobilla all right. Not a sponsor, I'll kill you. Not a sponsor. Okay, so you're gonna offer me a condition? Hold on, hold on, hold on. I tweeted about a lot of our listeners commented, which is why I'm mentioning the client, not even a client. Gobilla's Goodbilla's Gobilla's kindis is you don't know what conditions? You need to google condition? Hey, and I s h kndition. So every day, Uh, gobill is Kindish is is an institution in the New York area. Okay, I buy Gbilla kindish is at Costco. I buy him at chop right. I buy him in like an eight pack whatever it is, six pack eight pack, And every day as part of my snack on my lunch, I pop a condition a toaster oven. I toasted up and uh it smells fantastic. It gets crispy, really good microwave it's good. But when you crisp it up so good. So on the air, I was just like, what is every day, Brodie? What are you doing? What? What's that smell? I said, that's my kind that's a goobilla kindish, that's the best. And he says, oh, so we start talking about conditions whatever. Anyway, that day gabilli Is Kndis has tweeted me and said, oh, thanks for the shout out. We'd love to send you some kindishas. Why said, it's very nice. Who doesn't love goodbill is Condisius? So I I said, you could send it here? So, uh, this is what would you like? I said, well, you know some of the round conditions, the square conditions. If you want, I said, whatever you want, and do some potato pancakes. They got a line of everything. They got sweet potato kindishes and cast condition they stuff anyway. So I get this massive case two days ago, right, and Uh's more than I could ever eat. And I and I and right, uh and you had left for the day. So what I did was I they put in a big silver bag. I took it all home. I put a lot of it in the freezer. And you get nothing. You know what? Then, good day, sir. Well guess what what? I'm happy I didn't call your ass refresh direct, so go fuck yourself. Fuck you Brodie. I didn't give you Cabilla's because you gave away my strawberries. And you know what, now that I know this. I'm happy in retrospect that I didn't call you for free Fresh Direct groceries because you're not sharing Gabrilla's commissi conditions with me. You know what? You know what you do share with me a microphone and airtime on this podcast. That's right. So how is how is Sebastian Man of scal calling in concert radios to the music? It was a Christmas gift from Robin whoever you want. You had no whoever you want, no rights to that. If Tall Darren was in town, you would have taken him. He wasn't. Not not not the day you went. Three days later, three days later you something. You are a bastard. You really are. I got you for the dinner. Give me a conisition. What's wrong with kiss sign? There's a bowling alley near me? Just think about this, the bowling alley, big sign with those letters. You put on the white sign and it says it says, have your event here today. Now they're trying to promote the fact that they have room for birthday parties and gatherings. Right, have your event here today. What's wrong with that sign is the in your belt have your event here today? Here today today. Well it's already too late, that's my point. I mean, who has an event and they're driving by a bowling alley and they go, oh, let's take the party. Hey, Jimmy, we're gonna have your birthday party. There, have your event here today, writing like let me call my friends and going right now, all right, oh having a sweet sixteen let's go there, and a sign should say book your event today, So come in. But you can't have your event today. What are you like, Oh, you're gonna have the place burned down where you have We're gonna have an event, and all of a sudden, like we have nowhere to go. Oh, there's a place we can have an event today, Let's go there. So I called bullshit on the bowling alley near my house. Okay, uh oh, here's another bullshit. Matt Harvey. Matt Harvey's a well known picture for the Mets. He used to be really good. He's had some on problems. He's not that good right now. He's going through it. He's going through it's going through a phase. So you don't need to know about sports, because that's on the point of this. I'm listening to the sports station here in New York, and a guy calls up and they put Matt Harvey. They made him a relief pitcher, right, and and so a relief picture only pitches a couple innings. So the theory is you can throw really hard for a couple of innings rather than try to throw for nine innings or eight in seving. So the guy calls up the radio station and he says, yeah, I think if Matt Harvey is gonna be in the bullpen, you know what, put him in there and let him go balls to the you know what. He censored the wrong part of the sentence. The part of the sentence just you sent some balls. You're not centered the wall. Expression is balls to the wall. You senor you go you know what to the wall. You don't say he's got to go balls to the you know what? He says what on the radio? What an asshole? He probably was on hold for an hour and a half so you could call up with his great theory on Matt Harvey. Matt Harvey needs to go to the bullpen so you can go balls to the you know what. Hey, that's like saying, Hey, your mom is a fucking horn. She smells like well, you know, it's a little late to saytan poop at that point. So my point is, know what the hell you're saying when you call a radio station? Was a mini ran? That's okay, I guess because Scotty be just walked into the room. It's good because I have a shopping complaint and Scotty's Scotty, and I can I tell you about Scotty and Scotty and I not only we only with two of the Jews on the show, but anytime he comes on the air, I get credit for it. That's right. I saw that. Yeah, So if Scotty cuts coupons, people of text tweet me and go, hey, I need your secrets on cutting Coupon's not me. Scotty was on extreme couponing. Scotty used to do a podcast called Coupon Corner. That's Scotty. So Scotty came in a couple of days ago and Elvis goes, how much is it the ship of Potato? And Scotty knew. So five minutes later I get a tweet, Hey, Brodie, I'm so impressed with you that you always know how much it is the ship. Things you know off top, you handed how much ship of potato. That's great. That was Scotty. So we are two different people old Jews aren't the same person. Okay, but we both complain about shopping. I have a complaint. I want his opinion, but you go first. But okay, first of all, Scottie, I didn't know, by the way, that you could actually ship a coconut by itself. That's the big stamps on. That's his big pickup girls in a bar line, Hey on it, can I buy you a drink? Did you know you can ship a coconut? So just putting the label on? Okay, So I think I screwed up? Uh? And old How do I do this? Oh? Without mentioning names? Okay? So an old friend just before you freaking asshole? So an old friend of ours? I was like, who is this an old friend of ours? That's three times? Come on, yeah, she doesn't listen. All right, We're not gonna name her name anyway, comment to us back in the day, don't guess. Hold on, can I tell? I want to give a secret right now? I want to get a secret. Earlier in the podcast, this guy isn't shut up? Hold on. Earlier in the podcast, I was talking about a singer. We had our friend Spruce in here, and Spruce said, this this singer, I don't want to mention her name, but she's not great at singing parodies. She's a great singer, but when it comes to being a character being funny, she's not good at that. But if you wanted to sound like the original singer, she's amazing. So I say to Scary, So I said, oh, you know the songs that she's on. She's a professional singer, she's a famous singer. So I said, this one song she's if I tell you the three words that she sings, like like the famous three, I go, I go, you know the song? So he says the name of the song. So we had to edit it out because he can't keep a goddamn secret. So now he's playing like I shouldn't give up the secret about who this girl is? Is this this show that you get it all out on? Oh? Yeah, holy hell, all right, I'm good. Blood pressure just went up. I'm sorry, isn't he who's the girl? He's absolutely fucking nuts. I'm not. I'm calm, I'm is not. Scary drives me crazy. He can't keep a secret. But once anyone else keep seeing. I mean, I can't be the only one that sees it. I'm good. I'm absolutely your smoke coming out of your I have to say today, I'm a little I have I have a court date tomorrow. I'm on edge that one. That's scary, scary fault. It's my fault, in charge of your own car story. Okay, So what I wanted to what I wanted to say, Well, let's bring it down a few notches. So she's like, hey, I want to get in touch with Scotty. I'm smoking him in forever. And I'm like great, I said, here's his number. So I gave Scotty cell thinking that he'd want to catch up with her and talk to her. And I said, hey, okay, great, And then she just texted me that she said, ah, Scotty sounded a little put off by my phone call. Sound like, here's the thing. First of all, I picked up my my phone rang it was a two on one number. I'm like, okay, I don't know what this is. And then and then she said this is and I didn't hear what she said. So it took me a second of her talking to me to even figure out who the hell it was. I was talking for literally two minutes before I knew who she was, and then she's asking me for stuff for charity event. I'm like, you working for the guy that does it? You you can send her some stuff you work in the promotions department. But anymore. But once you made the connection, once you made the connection of who she was, were you excited to hear her or not excited? No? Well, you guys were like cool in the past. You guys were, yeah, but we u still. I used to work with a lot of people that we hung out with and like that. I don't give a ship anymore. I mean, I'm sorry, if you're listening, it was, you know, thank you for calling me. But it was just like weird circumstances. I would love to hang out with everybody and get a drink, but she wants to get together. Here's the thing. First of all, I do not like talking to people on the phone, even my wife. I text text, text, text text. I just don't like. My wife will get finished up at some appointment. She'll call me hey, So you know, I'm like, so, you're not a fan at all. No, I just want to I owe you an apology if you need something for me cell phone? Do I have to take your cell phone? Building? Because I seed to be owing everybody everything. Let me say They saying scary did this for the longest time, and I would ask him, don't, please, don't do this. He would go to an appearance or a college or somewhere out in public, and he would meet somebody inevitably who wanted an intern here. So he would no, no, He would email heart and me and go he, hey, Brody, I met this girl. She wants to intern. And he would give up my personal email address and and then he would have it, and then he would directly email me and go, hey, I want to intern. He's my resume. And then if I don't hire them, they're like, hey, what happened? Why don't I get the job? Don't give out people's things. Don't get about that personal information that I could do it, guy, but I'd rather somebody else do it. So he well, yeah, but you could have sent her an autograph shirt from the morning show too, I don't. Yeah, no, but but you have a connection to the department connection here, but you have a sign them, you have it all. You sit there and you sit there out in the open in that that open area out. I don't really do that anymore. You talk to those people. I don't know you sit there though, No, I go there for an hour before the show, so I don't see anybody, open area, open area down there. After the show, I sit down there in the dark before the show starts. I do my work, I do the show, and I get the hell out of here. Oh, you don't go downstairs ever, very rarely. I go down there and I bring the contest sheets downstairs, and I say what's up? And I leave. I don't know anybody. I think you sit down there for an hour sometimes, but I really don't. I don't well for whatever, whatever the case, And we're going on and on about that. Don't give out the people's phone on this. Yeah, I just didn't know if I should have. I felt bad afterwards because it sounds like when she got back to me, she said, Scotty sounded a little put off by hearing me. The easiest thing to do when you want to pawnch it off on other people is just give out an email address. Emails. Well, don't give out my email. Here's what you really should do. Hey, give me your information. I'll get it to the person and they'll get in touch with you if they're interested. Oh yeah, then then you're off the hook anyway, Right then you go. I gave it to him. I don't tell, but I'm a person to just get things done personal, to give away my strawberries. You like to be that. You like the master's ceremonies. Hey have some bronie strawberries. I didn't get one of those chocolate. You weren't sitting there the minute he was giving them away. You should have been there. You're popping downstairs in your open areas. My hours whatever. It is. An old friend, UH wanted you number. I gave it to her, And now it seems like I'm number for life. Let me ask Scotty the the supermarket expert, fellow shopper, I need your your and then we're gonna go. I'm gonna oka do some unused jokes. How long is this thing? That's what she said, coming up? Ohio, we're coming up on two hours. No, we're not anyway, so real quick. So, Uh, I went to Target and I wanted to get my diopepsis. It was a sign, uh four for nine. No, that's the other Diopepsi story. This, by the way, for the record of keeping track, is the short Diopepsi story. So four for nine they are out of regular Diopepsi. So I take a picture, right, and I go up to customer service. You're supposed take a picture. Excuse me, you're out of dia Pepsi. Here's the picture. You're out of it. I'd like a rain check now for those. If you don't know, if there's a sale on something, you sow that they're out of it, and they will let you buy it the next time, even if it's not on sale, because you were there when the sale is going on. Yes, okay. So she looks in the computer click and click, click, and she says, oh, I'm sorry, there's no rain checks on those. What are you talking about? You used to do that. What are you talking about, Oh, we changed our policy at the beginning of the year. What do you mean you change the policy. Well, that's a vendor stocked item. If you don't know what that means, that means. Pepsi's drivers come in with a big truck and they unload the Pepsi onto the shelf into their spot and just well if Pepsi refills their own product. We don't rain check that. That's Pepsi's fault. So I said, wait a minute, you sell the pepsi. I'm shopping in your store. You should honor it. Sell me the pepsi. You and I are usually on the same I probably would have just got to another target, because you know what, if you look at me, I've got no life. I'm driving from target to target. You look at the add I guarantee you it said limited to store stock. No, I didn't look at dad. I looked at the sign. I'm in the store. It's just four for nine. I mean, if they didn't have four, they had none. Okay, well check A supermarket is different. You get rain checks, not a supermar Yeah. I get drain checks from the supermarket. All it does rain checks on everything. But they decided now because the vendor didn't stop them. F me. Did you reach out to them on Twitter or anything? I am going to I'm telling the story. First, he's gonna get a whole case. He's gonna get a palette sent into this house is a two potter, is a cliffhanger. If they could find his house, they'll find my house. I got the ups guy. You know what, I love you, and I love saving money and I love deals. But you're a bit over the top. Man. They put you on a coupon show because you bought two jars with the groceries for a dollar fifty, but they had you kept a woman behind you in line for like an hour. She was not happy. Yeah, I'm over the top. You were sweating balls when they didn't take your coupons. Pus. Every store managers worst fucking nice. I'm very nice. I just want my rain checking. There was no rain checking this situation. When we go on vacation and stuff, I pray that you're not a dinner with us. I know that sounds terrible, but it's not an admission. I'm sorry. I'm just I mean, like, this is gonna be a fucking ordeal of brodies with us, and is every time, isn't it. I get uncomfortable going places with you because I know that he's gonna be a confrontation. You know it's dude. I like my stuff to be right too. But dude, there's lettuce on this. There's there's lettuce. I said, no, lettuce, take it back, and I want it for free and I want more free ship. I just take the lettuce off. Brody is face palming, and he's you have the look of death on your face right now, but you but you also look like you also look deflated. Dude, I love you. I love you. I really do like a good thing. You love me. He's like a flat tire right now. I'm sorry. I had to get it out. You invited me in here. I didn't hold on. I've been trying to get out of here. I mean, can I go? You go? Please? Let me get the door for you? Tell us what else? I guess I'll I'll eat the lettuce next time, and bro and the stuff him. But Scotty is the king of coupons, It's true. And when there's a deal to be had, Scotty is there. But you know, fair is fair, right. I guess this four for nine thing, I think it's a little over the top. I think the listeners would agree for company policy. They just changed, Okay, so then you have to abide by it, which I did. I didn't cause a stink, but you're about to. That's I was just saying, what am I gonna do? I went to shop, right, I got I got four for nine from them. I did give you that coupon, Yes you did. I got four for seven thanks to Scott, the one guy I like in this freaking show. I asked him to go out to dinner. Doesn't answer his phone, So I tell you end up going out with Scary then sorry, I'll tell you what he does. Now. He brings me his empty bottles so I can return them in New York. Asked me for them? Yeah, well no, I did ask empty bottle. Well, you don't get I don't pay the five cent deposit fee in New Jersey, right, that's on the bottle. They don't charge you. Okay, So I give him Scotty. He gets the five cents I never paid back, and this is what he thank how he thanks? You know, so you get a dime back. I hope you go to jail. You've fuck She get a nickel yet, extract he's not returning my call. You know why they took his phone in the showers. They get you get an extra nickel. You get a nickels in New York. You pay a nickel deposit on each bottle. You don't know, you don't even care what you pay. You don't Scary throws nickels on the floor when they don't recycle. In New Jersey, they don't return didn't say that. They don't charge cents. They don't give it back. To New York. When you buy a case award, they charge you sixty cents. My wife, my wife crossed the border into New York yesterday when she was shopping. She's like, Oh, I'm gonna go to STEUW. Leonards. We love Stu Lenon's look it up, Google it. And she went across the border of New Jersey into New York. What a lot of soda. It's like, oh, pick up soda. And he's like, never buying soda there again. I paid five cents on every bottle, which is a lot when you buy six packs. We used to shop in Connecticut, she knew. So you get penalized, hold on the stuff, canalyzed. They just want you to recycle. So you so they charge you the extra nickel and it's invisible to you. But here it is in New Jersey, they may bild on. In New Jersey they may charge you the nickel, but it's in the price. But in the other places they charge you the price, and then on the receipt it says five cents, So what's the difference, because you can get it for cents if you didn't buy it in because they make you go to the little machines and return it to get your nickel back, and most people don't do it. They don't care. They throw them out. So okay, I'll take bottles any day. What you're not getting my Wow, I just lost twenty cents and a friend named David Brody. Hey, are you're going? You're going to Miami right, Brodie dinner? He's not even paying attention to you anymore. He's done with you. You know. It's okay, man? What what can I do to have that hold on? Is just something I could save? Brodie? Thank you? Give me the silent treatment. You want to go back to your old calls, because that's what it's coming to you do like my serial though, I know that. Would I give you money for? Yeah, actually make money on you because I pay and I'm not cheap about it. I give you money every few days. I'll give you that. And by the way, when I when I say this, let us on my food, I'm not grumpy about it. I say, excuse me, I owered this without let us And I'm very polite, but then you wind up getting something else for free because you're angry. I'm not angry. I'm angry now you fuck. All right, let's go over unused punch lines. These are just the ones. These are just the ones that are timely for this week, Scotty, could you come in every week anyway? Give us your punch lines. These are the things that Elvis that I wrote for Elvis, and he didn't use them. He laughed though with a couple of these, but he didn't get in because someone on the show kept interrupting him every five minutes. All right, So Danielle did his story about how Beyonce brought her sister Solange on stage Coachella. You saw the joke, right, and uh, and she she brought us just to Salange up on stage to perform with her. So my joke goes, really Solange, how did she get a ticket to the show? By the way, what a what a joke? A launch? All right? Okay, alright, Uh, we were talking about if you're with somebody like so President Trump was with uh with with President French president and he noticed the a little danger on his shoulder, and he brushed the danger for Alvis turned into a conversation about if you see somebody with danger, what a fly is open or something's wrong, never was something in their teeth? Do you tell them? And if it's an opposite sex, like you're on an elevator and the girl's broadstrap is out or flies open to you tell her? So we started to come up with examples of celebrities, like would you if if a guest came in here? So I said, if Fetty Wapp were here and his glass I was crooked, would you tell him? Hid into that joke. So he changed it and he said, oh, what if Fetty Wapp was here wearing shorts and one of his testicles and one of his penis fell out of his shorts. Now I don't know why he'd have to use Frettie Wapping that analogy, because Fretty Wapp was the subject of the glass eye joke. By the way, I love Fetti Whop, I don't fenn Fetty Whapper. That was the joke. So what I said, well, the Fetty wap stick was hanging out, they'd call that a Fettie flopp. He didn't do it. And finally the joke he would not do. Keep in mind, I know you're gonna say it too soon, but that's not my role in life. My role is to make jokes and leave it up to other people to decide if it's funny. It's tragic, I know, but this was the joke Verne Troyer passed away, and so the joke was, Oh man, it just reminds you how how short life is. I said he had a song. I said he had a short life. He said in a short life. That that's funny. I think Vern Troyer would have found Verne joked about himself all the time. I was not joking when him dying. It's tragic he died, but he had a short life. His life was cut short any any anywhere. Yeah, there's a million jokes there actually. But all right, so I've got all the jokes that I'll use next week. I've got a lot of rants, and I've got to go rethink my friendship with Scott. All right, all right, I've had a fun time here today. Most of it was yes's dragging out with us always Email us at the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com. And next week will read them, Yes we will, because you know where they're from. Brooklyn Boys from Brooklyn, Brooklyn Boys Brock Brooklyn,