#121: Don't Drink The Coronaccino

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Speaker 1: Start up, dat Up, start Up, Brooklyn Boys, start Up, Brooklyn Buys, start Data. They're making noise data up Episode one one of the Brooklyn Boys podcast. And we're not second one from home. We're doing it for us. How do you feel about that, Brodie? Well, I'm not in my basement today where it was freezing. I'm in my den because my family's out taking a ride to nowhere, driving around being safe, and so I can yell and scream in my own house. I mean, I may not yell and scream, but I can if I want to. So I'm sitting here in my den in front of my fake fireplace. That's that heats up the space within three ft of it. Unfortunately I'm six ft away from it, so I'm still cold. It sounds like you didn't pay your rent. No I have. But what's going on? You want me to call the city? No. My my den is right off the garage, and so one wall is not insulated to the garage. So, uh, it's not as warmer room as it could be. There's not as much heat in the room as there should be, so it's a little colder than my other rooms, but much warmer than my basement. That's what I'm saying. Okay, Well, I'm happy that you're doing well. I'm trying to figure out this this mixer. Yeah okay, so so yeah, last episode we talked about how you kept me on. You kept talking for five and a half minutes talking about this new equipment you bought. Right, So today is Saturday, and we were supposed to do the podcast on Thursday. Then we didn't do it on Thursday, and then we didn't do it on Friday. So you've had two and a half days to get this thing ready to do the podcast, and then when I call you, you took another twenty minutes trying to figure out how to make it work. What have you doing for two and a half days, growing a beard and sitting here. I'm not doing well, Brodie. I'm really not. Okay, your face isn't call team. You can shave your beard. I don't think I've ever seen you with a beard. I don't. I'm a mess right now. I am. I am really a mess because I've tried to get this equipment up and running. I tried like calling places ordering the right parts. I even went to Staples to get connectors and connections that I later found out I didn't need. So now I have to get brody on my side because I have a full receipt with three items that I bought on accident. I thought I needed a CAT six cable. Do you know what a CAT six cable is? I know roughly what it might be. Yeah, it's a it's a it's like a Cat five but stronger. But the thing is apparently the way that information for computers are carried, it carries the faster, the higher number, the better. Well, apparently someone said, oh, well you need a high speed to get stuff, you know, communicator. I know who said I know who said that to you? A salesperson. No, it wasn't. It wasn't a salesperson. It was somebody that somebody in radio that told me that I needed to do it. And the engineer used to buying radio station quality gear. No, I already had a Cat five E, which is what we use every day on all of our Ethernet cables. So I didn't need a Cat six. And what did I do? I busted open the box and before then I then I realized after the fact, damn it. So now I have a broken box. And then they said, oh, well you need a sound card reader. Well, I'm like, okay, that thing cost me like bucks, but I gotta I gotta tell you. When I got home, I realized the back of my computer has a sound card reader. I don't need a sound card reader, so I want to return that, but I already opened it up. See now, when you don't, when you have kids to support and a family, you don't make these financial mistakes because you pay more attention and you're more um sensible with your money. That's your problem. Your girlfriend's not around, you have no kids or pets, so you're flinging money around and cats six cables. Listen, my four one k took it hit like everybody else's no, no, my, my my, if you no kidding. If I'm gonna be completely honest, but little extra money I have during the week, I don't really think twice about frivolously spending it and then and then finding a way to what I will say, I've saved a lot of money this week because Amazon isn't two days shipping everything. So I have your dog benefit. My dogs are going crazy. That means one of two things. The Maleman is here, uh or my family is home, in which case We're gonna pause this thing and I'm gonna move downstairs. You could pause it or we could start over again. Oh, we'll pause the podcast. Okay, yeah, I have I have two dogs. They're going crazy in the in the front window. Well, I haven't heard they. Is Amazon delivering essential hims? Is that? What's going on? Do you got some toilet paper finally arriving? Oh? No, I got toilet paper a Target. Target has a great thing on its website. I don't if I talked about this last episode, but you can go to Target's website, put in the item you're looking for, and then it will show you which locations have it. And so I've just found the places that had toilet paper, and I've gone there and gotten just what I need because they have a one toilet paper a one toilet paper limit, so you buy the biggest package you can because by one. And so I'm good on toilet paper. And then two nights ago they said they had wiped sanitary wipes sanitizing wipes rather than stock. Uh. And it was like seven thirty and they closed at eight, and I thought I want to run out of the house and fly over there. Then I didn't, so I went first thing in the morning and they were sold out. So you have to you have to watch the website from the parking lot and then when something says it's in stock, running so wow, I mean, I mean it's that competitive. It is. Yeah, although they drove me crazy because on the website, not only does Target tell what's in stock. And this is not a commercial for Target, not a sponsor. Um, we got the point. Shut up. I guess it wasn't your family, no, no, so, And I wouldn't tell my family to shut up either. I know what you're saying. Though. Target will not only tell you if it's in stock, it tells you what ailet's in. So for instance, it said the sanitizing wipes are in a fifty as an apple fifty because they so you know exactly where to look. So I go to the store again early in the morning and I'm looking at the aisles in the you know how supplies pharmacy, and it's like a forty four, forty five. It gets to a forty seven and there's no more aisles. It becomes the grocery department. There is no forty nine and fifty. So I'm walking around like a chicken out a head looking for a fifty, and there is no a fifty. So I asked one of the sales member that the team members there a target and she says, that's a great question. That's what she said to me. Wow, that's a great question. Yeah, she I said, do you know where l a fifty? Because it ends at forty seven? Just why I never noticed that before? So I said, okay, but where is it? I don't know. Maybe the website is wrong, I said, well, I doubt the website is wrong because apparently you've got a bunch of stuff in that aisle. And so together we walked over to another sales associate and they said, oh, no, it's all the way over there. So what they did was along the side wall of Target. Um, they started the numbers from forty eight, right. So the problem is a forty eight is approximately next to a thirty, like across from so you'd have no way of knowing to go all the way back to the front of the store to start the numbers and continue. That's ridiculous. Why why wouldn't you put forty eight next to already seven and go up towards the front of the store rather than start counting again from the front. It makes no sense, right. So the aisle that was actually next to forty seven, which was unlabeled, was something like a sixty three or something. So f you target designing numbering lane, guy, because you screwed me. But anyway, we got to a fifty, which was like by the dog food, uh, nowhere near where I was looking, and they didn't have the product anymore. I'm convinced they sold out while I was looking for that aisle, Like, I feel like they had it when I got there. You waste You wasted all that precious time. Yeah, and the ten minutes of trying to find someone that kne where the aisle was. I feel like people who maybe knew where they was got there first and got the lysol wipes. So what a mess? Yeah? Yeah, what are you gonna do? As I'll tell you what you're gonna do. You're gonna wash my hands more often. So Brodie, I, Um, I had a little grocery store incident the other day too. Uh and it reeks of a scamboni. And I want your opinion. Okay, well maybe I did, but no, what do you make of this? You go into a grocery store. It says two for five dollars on this milk. So I'm like, oh, that's interesting. I think I'll have to I'll get two of them now because because I'm saving money, right, I bring them up to the front and I'm like, before you bring that up, I'm like, how much are they each? And the woman says to fifty. But I said, that's not a discount. I said, they're two fifty each and it says two for five dollars? Should they be three dollars each? So it makes me feel like I'm saving a dollar. She says no, because we're just you know, we're at the end of our lotment on that. That's a that's a major scambony because they want people to think they have to buy two to get the deal. That is exactly it. So when you see two for five dollars, make sure that you are saving some money. They were just at the expiration data is coming up people into buying two, right, and most people wouldn't ask. So I said no, no, no, no, no no no. I said, I think I just want one then, and she said okay, and I put it the other one back. But the point is that's a sucking major scamboni because you know, she made me, he made me think she mean, she mind funcked me. It's just thinking I'm saving money, so I'm gonna buy two. But meanwhile they're two fifty each. Who cares? Okay, So I don't want to I don't want to dog poble on Target because I'm a big fan. But they do the same thing. I buy six packs of diet Pepsi or diet coke, and they'll do, like, oh, four dollars, Like oh, that's a great deal because normally it's like three dollars each, three and a quarter each, so it's a good deal. So you're look and it says four dollars and an entiny print. We gotta get a magnifying glass out it says two. So you're like, oh, I gotta buy four, or I gotta buy eight, or I gotta buy twelve, because they want you to think you're only getting the deal if you buy it in units of four. She you always have to check that sometimes it's legit. Like I buy um baked scoops, totatoes, Tostitos, big scoops and they're always three for six when they're on sale. Two p six when they're on sale, but they're not three dollars each, so that's legit. Yeah, of course it's legit. But the thing is, why does it Why does it have to go backwards where I have to find I have to go backtrack at the register and say how much are they each? Like? Why did isn't it say it right there? How much they are each? They just wanted to pair them together and sell them and get them the hell off the shelf. I mean that's that is pretty low. Well it almost it almost worked on you, but you listen to this podcast and you know not to trust anybody. But speaking of me, I'm not a fan. I wanted to give a shout out to j C. Guitardi. Hold on, I'm gonna go on. I'm gonna go on Apple iTunes and rate this one star. Do you want to give a shout out? The shout out to j C. Guitarty on the Instagram who sent me a picture or you know, maybe our listeners sent me a screenshot of this. But it's um it's a milk. That's a gallon of milk and it says best buy right be used by February three, beeth So if that's the case. Does that milk never spoil if it's best used my February thirty and that's never gonna happen, then is it never good? Yeah? So that was I want to thank you, thank him for that picture. That was great. Um. Yeah, So you gotta be careful in stores what you're paying for. Um. I will tell you somebody overpaid for a product. But I totally get it. Um. Dj Millie on Twitter at DJ Underscore, M I l l I underscore and why Uh. He tweeted me and said, look at what I bought on Amazon for thirty bucks. I caved and it's delicious. It's a case of diet grape Pico soda. Um, my favorite diet grape soda in the country that only ships as we talked about a couple of weeks ago to Alabama, so you can get it on Amazon and overpay, which he did. So he's happy with his purchase. I might have to break down at some point during this um this quarantine and get me some diet grape soda because I'm here all day. I might as well. Right, I'm gonna got to treat yourself. You gotta treat yourself now you're right, I read it. I read a great post today from I think it was our friend it was a Cubby or j J. I forget which one. It said, gas is at all time low, well at least in the past ten twelve years. Airline tickets are ridiculously cheap, but we're not allowed to go anywhere. So I have the gas by my house was a dollar ninety nine. But I'm not driving anywhere, so I don't need it. But I feel like I should buy it just because it's so cheap. Am I wrong? No, you're not. Why don't you get a couple of gallon containers and fill up? And I'm still not doing that. I'm not a prepper. I'm not gonna start stocking up like Scotty Beef from our show. Yeah, this is the time to fly, and and you know you can't. I know that, I know that, but this, this would be the time. Well, why don't you buy tickets for the future, Like why can't you project and say, you know what, I'm gonna go somewhere in August because they're not selling tickets for you to fly next year for thirty dollars. They want you to fly now while the planes are empty. So if you look at August, if you look at August prices right now, you're not gonna see anything. You're not gonna see like a bargain. I don't know. I can't plan ahead. Who the hell knows what's going on in the world in August. It could still be going on to this level. It could be relapsing because we all went back to work. I can't plan it to to in August. What we're gonna be doing. I'm still hoping baseball comes back. Let them figure it out. Now they're talking about playing baseball. We talked about this last week. How that now that? What did I say? You heard from me first? Now they're talking about playing in neutral sites in warm weather, playing the World Series in December. I called it, said they were gonna play in neutral sites and indoors and in warm weather. But how do you get you get enough people to fill up a stadium when it's a site. As of today, baseball players came out and said they don't have a problem playing in front of empty stadiums because they realize the problem. Because they want to get paid, they want to play. You get all the players who are gonna be free agents, you don't want to be a free agent based on a bad season or a half a season. You want, you want, you want to play, So yeah, this is interesting. They're gonna play all doubleheaders and UH and neutral sits. So I look for UH for teams like hours, like the Mets here in New York. They could be playing in UH in Tampa Bay in the Dome. But you know to watch the game, so you have to watch it on TV. But who's going to show up? It'll be funny when you know what we made this joke on the air about, Like you know, there are teams that have no fans in the stadium normally, like you know, Miami and sometimes Pittsburgh. No offense, UH, it'll look like that. The foul balls, nobody catches them, home runs hit the seats, nobody's there. Well, all I could say is that I am I am going out of my mind in this corn team I've done. I've started getting to the point where I'm pulling apart my drawers and closets and rearranging them. Like you know, the junk drawer that everybody has I got. I got one of those. I literally pulled it out and I took everything out of it. I started throwing some things away and I started rearranging it. But the title of the drawer is drunk drawer. It's that's from where all the junk is supposed to go. You're not supposed to clean out the junk drawer. It's supposed to be for junk. Everything in it is junk. Wells sorting everything out. I had about twelve twelve things left in there, and I'm like, this is is everything was indeed junk. Why don't we even keep junk drawers? And everything should just go in the garbage A lot of time the drunk good. Look. Everyone has stuff in their life that you don't know where to put it right because there's no specific spot for uh the uh Budweiser bottle opener that you got from ten years ago that you don't want to throw out because you might need it. So you're like, I'll throw it in the drawer. You know it's the egg slicer. You don't you don't know where you're gonna use it again, but you don't want to get rid of it, so you throw it in the drawer. Yeah, it's the drawer for like, where do I put this? So if you organize it. Eventually you're gonna throw unorganized stuff on top of it, so there's no point. You're wasting your time. That's like buying a CAT six cable you're wasting or a there's another one that I got this USBC two into Ethernet. I don't need it, no, because I don't. I have an Ethernet. I have Ethernet on my computer. It's silly, it's really silly. Oh man, they got me at Staples. They really did. They really got well, I got myself. It's my own fault. You're your own easy button. They saw you. They're like, oh, this guy's easy and everything. Well, no, it was it was. I got bad advice before I showed up in the store. Believe me. Let me tell you what's going on there. These people aren't trying to sell me anything. They're trying to run the other way. They see a customer walk in the store and they're like, somebody actually had the guts to come outside, and they all, you know, they're running around with their gloves and they don't want to approach you unless you know, so you're not really getting the best customer service. And I understand why you're not looking for the best customer service in these situations, because the same way you don't want to have interaction with people, they don't want to have interaction with you, and they have ever right too. So so yeah, so it was kind of you know, I was walking up and down the aisles by myself. You know, there was no one in the store. They were kind of surprised to see me. And then finally, I, uh, you know, I went when when I needed their assistance, the guy reluctantly came from behind the counter with his gloves on everything, and he got me what I needed, you know. But you know, and and now it turns out I need none of it. But we'll tell me one thing though. This gives me a task for tomorrow. I get to go out and I get to return to stuff. Exactly. I feel like I've done something with myself, right, Well, you should definitely wear gloves if you're could be doing something with your elf. Okay, great, that was a masturbation jokes here, no, no, no, I got it. A little bit of a delay here on the road podcaster pro. Yeah, you got the podcaster pro. It's a delay again. I want to point out to the slices I've got eleven year old laptop here and a bluetooth from ten years ago in my ear and it's now. I do have a rant about my bluetooth. But I wanted to reference something you mentioned a second ago. Well, you said the employees had gloves. So a few things I want to want to want to hit on. Number one, I was in Chipotle a couple of days ago, and they have they put chairs in front of the counter all the way across so you can't get close to the counter, which is very smart. In cvs, they have um fold up tables like bridge tables, a row of them across, so you with the credit card machine on the table so that you can't get close to the cashier, which I think is great. Also, remind me to tell you about the guy at the pizza place. I get to him in a minute. But as far as gloves go, I do want to talk about a couple of places that I was at this weekend um or the past couple of days that didn't have gloves. But before I do, I want to reference a nurse who tweeted me very upset today. She listened to episode one twenty other podcast and you know last week I complained that a couple of businesses that I was at, the employees weren't wearing gloves. And I'm just gonna paraphrase her tweet, and she said she's a nurse, which, by the way, shout out to all the nurses and doctors and medical professionals who are working their asses off long shifts to save lives and protect lives who are unfortunately for many reasons, working without proper equipment, without the supplies they need, which is a tragedy in this country anyway. So the nurse who tweeted me was upset because she felt I was saying that the employees don't have gloves. Yet she's working in a garbage bag and reusing the same gloves every day, and how come I'm upset when the the kid at the ice cream store doesn't have gloves. She was saying that that was you being petty. Well, she was saying, I shouldn't be upset that they don't have gloves. There's a glove shortage and nurses are being affected, and I shouldn't be you know, there's a reason they don't have gloves. So I want to explain my comments because I'm gonna make more of them today. Um, I'm very upset nurses don't have gloves, but nurses use surgical level, high quality gloves to protect them and and they should have as many as they need. And every politician locally and nationally, she would do whatever they have to to get them to the to the right people. I'm referring to the cheap, thin, restaurant level gloves that shop right cells and boxes and bins right now that anyone can buy. I'm talking about the box that was on the counter at the ice cream store behind the kid and he was choosing not to wear them. I'm talking about so you're clarifying your coat. I'm talking about when I was at Whole Foods three days ago and the cashier was handling all my foodos that you expected him to wear surgical gloves. No, no, no, no, what she was What she was saying was I shouldn't be surprised they don't have gloves when nurses don't have gloves. And but they're not talking about right, That's what I mean, talking about the fact that the woman who rang up my old, my stuff at Whole Foods a few days ago wasn't wearing gloves. And the box of gloves, full box of gloves was sitting next to her on the counter, and she was choosing not to wear them, and not just because she was touching my stuff. I was ranting or I'm granting now because she should be wearing them for her own protection. I don't get it, you know what I mean. So absolutely nothing but respect for the medical staffs that have to get the equipment they need. Um my comments had nothing to do with that, and I hope that we uh we still have a listener. And she did not follow me, which is great. She was very respectful. So she came upset. Well, I didn't say she came around. I said, as of now, I wrote her back. I hope she's understanding of my commentary. So there you go. Now. On that note, we get a lot of text messages for the morning show, and I see a lot of tweets on social media. If you're going to work doing an important job, that's fantastic. If you're going to work and just doing your job, that's good, right, But that doesn't mean you're on the level of the medical professionals who are risking their lives and coming down with illnesses with the coronavirus because they're trying to save lives. And so well, no, right, no, people complain that we didn't shout out their profession, which which goggles my mind. And and so I'm not gonna say the professions. Um, but I wanted to read some of the tweets minus the actual profession. All right, let's do that coming up right after this, okay, because okay, you break alright, alright, Okay, So, as I was saying, before the commercials from our lovely sponsors, we got a text message that said, you are forgetting to support blank and blank blanks that are risking themselves. Nope, nope, those people are not risking themselves. Uh. Then somebody wrote, I wish someone supported us blanks like they are supporting healthcare work. I gotta stop you right there, Brodie, what listen? Do you have balls or do you have balls? You've got you saying blank blank is is not entertaining. And furthermore, it's we can't. I can't even debate you on any of this stuff. You gotta give me a full tweek. Did the Brooklyn Boys ever blankety blank blank? Okay, all right, I'll read you one. I'll read you one verbatim, don't forget us retail workers who are always working the front lines during this pandemic, the front lines front. Okay, I am very appreciative that you are going to work at department stores and and pizza places and and what I get it the second hold on the way before you go any further. I have hold on. I have a chance finally to use this and that's why I brought the beautiful shiny equipment. Now, look, if you're a retail worker listening to this podcast, don't get offended. We are all very very happy that you're going to work. We hope you stay safe. I hope you're wearing gloves. But I know that you're not putting yourself in the same category as doctors and nurses. I know you're not. I know this is just one text message, but the front lines. Are you kidding me? Um? Here's another one. I want to pull this one up. Hold on, um, hey, why aren't you shouting out banking uh employees? What about the tellers? What about the tellers who give money out and keep the economy going? What would you do with a us this of shiny new equipment in all right? All right, okay, so again, I'm not looking to offend. But when you ask what we would do without tellers, my responses a t M S. In other words, look, it's important you go to work. I know people like going to the banks. I get it, and I will say, no, there is a degree of risk because they're handling dirty, filthy money things coming out of people's pockets. I but but it's but how do you put that on the on the same wet level as a nurse or a doctor or somebody who's on the front lines performing surgery in these situations. I'm not I'm not saying that everyone doesn't deserve to be thanked, because you do. You're you're helping society going. I get it. It's just when you text that in right after Elvis on our big show, thanks the first responders, police and firefighters, and yeah, right, they're not on the same level, right the police, like, hey, you forgot about so and so. There's there's a hundred million occupations, there's that. There's only some at the moment like, hey, I'm gonna shout out the Army Corps of Engineers right now because they just built hospitals in a in a um in a convention Center in New York in like two days. That's a shout out, right, Like, that's unbelievable. But the fact that you picked up the garbage is a nice thing. But it's not on the same level. So I'm gonna I'm gonna I agree with you. So look, I know I don't I don't want to get a shout Brody, because because I'm coming to work every morning, I'm still in that studio hanging out there with with Straight and Nate while everybody else's broadcasting my risking, my risking my job. Do I get a shout out? I'm being facetious. I do not listeners. A lot of our listeners have been very, very appreciative of the fact that we're still doing a show and and and it's the least we can do. We provide a service, information, maybe an escape from this awful quarantine stuff. We're all stuck in our house. But none of us would ever in a million years. Uh expect to shout out. I do not expect level as the people who are saving lives. I do not expect to shout out. I hope everyone listening, whatever you do for a living, you don't get offended. Uh, your your your slices who don't get offended easily. We know that. Well, that was the next thing I was gonna say. I feel like you're preaching to the wrong choir because but listen, people that listened to this podcast, they're not snowflakes. I know. But I offended a nurse and that wasn't my intention. And she's a loyal listener. Okay, but but but did she have any misunderstood my comments? Want someone else? That's something else. But but to these people sending these texts, seriously, that's something for Yeah, Okay, I got you, Yeah, I got Yeah. It's snow in David Brody. The snowflakes are out and the fire is so delightful. Okay, that's it. On that note, though, again, if you're going to work and you're keeping us the wheels moving, we thank you and appreciate you. We do, We really do, because if those people didn't go to work at Target, uh, you know, we would be lost without the supply. Get that. I totally get it. So nothing but love. Um what else you got going on? Um? Well, still been like twenty seven days since I saw my girlfriend, twenty and counting. That's why. Again, that's why I mentioned the gloves. I haven't seen my parents in about a month and a half. Started before it started, before the quarantine, I hadn't seen my parents. I haven't seen my mom in three weeks. Yeah, it's getting you know, and I do have a couple of my buddies, uh that you know, God love my buddy, you know, David David Ako. You know, he's he's uh what do we call him on this podcast? Something big on the way Dave Um because she's going completely batshit shut out. By the way, did not promise him a shout out, but he's getting one here, but for the wrong reason. So we're all under self quarantine. But every day he he does the opposite to him. Well, I'm not outing him. I'm I'm going to tell you what he wants to. He wants to get like me and a couple of like Will and a couple of the guys together for dinner. He every day of the week, he's like, Hey, maybe the uh, you guys could come over for some drinks just a couple of hours before you guys in that right last week last week it was like, oh, let's go to everyone's you know, just a couple of us are gonna have dinner together. We're gonna take out or or get catered or have cook or something. So you think that I'm a guy with FOMO and I can't sit still and I can't you know, I mean, this guy is me times ten. He's legit going crazy. He sent me a Texas morning saying, Hey, maybe you and Falco want to get together, just the three of us at my place and we'll have dinner and drinks and some laughs. So I'm sitting here like, oh man, I don't know if I should do this. I mean, I don't want to do this because I'm gonna break the streak. I haven't seen anybody, you know, so so I don't think I'm gonna go. You know, I have to say, ask if people to come over your house with all that's going on is kind of a kind of a dick move. I know a guy now that you tell that story, ye who just uh he keeps asking me to come over his house. He uh, he just bought a very expensive piece of podcasting equipment for his house, right, and he shut up so excited about and he keeps saying, you should come over my house, Brodie, and we could do the podcast from here. How great would it sound? I got two microphones and all this equipment. You should come over. What a dick that guy is? Am I right? Okay? First of all, we're serving the greater good, the people listening to heroes. It's much better. It's much better if the two of us were in were in person together. I mean right, I should risk, I should risk getting coronavirus so we can make the podcast sound a little bit better and I could be a hero. Shout out to the podcasters who were keeping their podcast quality sound up to stands. Not about the sound, it's about the dynamic. It's about listen. I know we're making the best of the situation right now. But you and me getting together when we've both do you and me, me and you, you and I, him and I, him and me and them and her all together doing at all those people together, weren't We're fucked. No. But but if if it's just the two of us doing just the two of us, I don't have that sound. Sorry. If the two of us were just hanging out in a room together doing a podcast and we've both been self quarantining, no harm, no foul, and that's what I'm saying, yeah, no, I get it. I get just saying we we definitely play off each other better when we're in person. I hate doing this over this lone. I don't feel comfortable right now. I know. I know last week I was saying I'm used to it from my other podcast, but I think after listening to last week's Brooklyn Boys, something is missing when the two of us are not in the in the same room. But other podcast I can do remotely because it's a little more even Keel Sharon, I have our chemistry and interact is more relaxed, and she's better right. I can yell at your more when I'm looking at your face. I understand what you're saying. But did I mention I have a fireplace, a fake fireplace right now that is heating up the room right in front of it, which I don't have when we when we work in the studio. So I'm looking at this roaring fireplace, which maybe I'll post a picture of at some point. Um It's it's a it's a three D image of logs and like a projected image of fire, and boy, it makes me feel like I'm in a cabin in the woods. This is fantastic. Eat your heart out. I said some sarcasm just a little bit. So. By the way, speaking of speaking of sarcasm, I mean I put up a post today. I think it was today, it was this morning, or late last night. It was late last night. I put up a very very sarcastic post. Right. It was a very pro Governor Cuomo New York post because I I think, and many people think that Governor Cuomo is doing a great job. And it was blatantly sarcastic. Yet three people were like, oh no, I think he's doing a great job. Or if you think he's bad, our Governor's worse. I'm like, oh my god. It was the most positive sarcastic tweet ever. People don't get sarcasm these days, right, So somebody said, this should be a sarcasm emoji, Like when you put it in, people know you like you're being sarcastic. So we need to figure out what emoji would be like good for sarcasm. Well, the one with the smirk, the smirk that exists is that is actually as close to sarcasm as possible. It's like it's like almost like like a smile, maybe a wink, maybe a wink. The problem, yeah, play a sarcasm is you don't say that was sarcastic. You just say it and people know you're being sarcastic. Hold on, I'm gonna google sarcasm emoji. It already exists, but you just don't know it yet. You don't you know? Yeah, you know, Yeah, I totally don't know it exists. Hold on, no, I'm I'm talking about this. You're being sarcastic, you bastard. I see what you're doing here. You're trying to win. I wink you didn't see me wink. Sarcasm emoji, Yeah, this is the one. This is the one. What does it say? What does it say? This is totally the sarcasm moji. Okay, this emoi? Yes, if you type in sarcasm emoji, it could be one of three. Um, the upside down smile is the sarkas is considered sarcasm emoji. That's brown, okay. The the one with the guy with his two eyes looking up can be used as sarcasm. Isn't that eye rolling? It? Could you roll your eyes? You could also be sarcasm. And then the one that I said, the smirk like the sideways I think people should just understand sarcasm and know that if I'm tweeting it, it's sarcastic. The sarcasm icon is with it. It's kind of like a crooked smile. The best way I could put it. We do a podcast for audio, not what the sideways the sideways smile. Yes, I'm sorry you're missing You're messing up my emojis now, I don't want to send a sarcastic comment. And the people, why is this guy sending me a vagina emoji? I don't get it. Oh my god. Ah. By the way, speaking of things being um misunderstood. Um, so you know, I don't. My Facebook is in public. It's just from my friends and family, and so thank and thank god it is. It's just for your friends and family. We don't want that escaping out to the public. No, okay, But I just tweeted something that was that that happened on my Facebook page. And so somebody I worked with many years ago in Brooklyn tagged me in a post. We were going back and forth about something you both agreed on on this particular political thing, and her her, I don't know, seventy eight year old aunt puts up something that was very anti one side of the political spectrum. And what she wrote was, um, a ludicrous thing she was accusing one of the political parties of doing. It was ludicrous and it was like one ludicrous thing on top of another on top of another, which I mean, it was so unbelievable, right, And she's like, and that's why those people suck. Now, I'm part of that half of the country that she said sucked. And so I googled the story to see what she was talking about. And it comes from a website called The Babylon the Babylon b which is basically another website like the Onion that writes ridiculous story story. And so this woman was ripping apart half of the country because of this story, which is a comedy, facetious, sarcastic story, satire. It's satire that's on a satire website. Oh my god, I love it. You know, you know, you have to be able to identify what's sarcasm and what isn't and what what is satire and what isn't? Um, what's a parody? Speaking of parodies, UM, I know, we usually do the unused jokes, the unused punch lines, but didn't. Did we have an unused parody from earlier this week before you play that. I just got a tweet from the nurse. Oh you, Oh this just in happening. It's just in this just in And I've never been so happy to be wrong before. And so I voiced texted her my response right, because I voiced text most of the time. Uh, and when you voice text sometimes the wrong there is not in the response properly right. So I wrote her back three text messages explaining myself, and she wrote back grammar police, you use the wrong there. So to the to the nurse that corrected my voice text. First of all, it wasn't my fault. But second of all, I love you and I'm so happy that you still have a sense of humor. Please stay safe at work, and please continue to save lives. Thank you very much. A slice for life. She has a slice for life, and I am I am tingly excited right now that she is not upset, uh, and that she's doing the kind of work that she that she does. Anyway, that being said, yes, unused jokes. So I wrote a song for the Morning Show that Elvis didn't feel was a good fit for the tone of what was going on. So you know, everything fits our podcast. So I wrote this as a tribute to what we're all going through. So enjoy an unused parody. On the first day of quarantine, my true love said to me, this will be fun. On the second day of quarantine, my true love said to me, let's pull around. There's no hand to quarantine insight. On the third day of quarantine, my true love said to me, what's on TV. There's no hand to quarantine inside. On the fourth day of quarantine, my true love said to me, let's make cut. There's no end to quarantine inside. On the fifth day of quarantine, my true love said to me, clean this mess up. There's no end to quarantine insight. On the sixth day of quarantine, my true love said to me, don't touch me, sleep on the couch. There's no end to quarantine insight. On the seventh day of quarantine, my true love said to me, I hate you. We should socially distance are so. On the eighth day of quarantine, my true stop singing. Hey put that out let me out here. That was cute. Thank you? What about that? I don't know how, I ask Elvis H Well, I mean but listen, I mean, it wasn't again you're a material. It was just okay, it was cute, it was fun. It was far as the point. Listen, my a material would be harsh and offensive, and I can't. You know, we're not gonna do that. But listen, Elvis knows the tone of his show. I give nothing but but props. He didn't feel it was a good fit or he didn't love it, and that's fine. So that's what we have a podcast for us. He always says, ah, do it on your podcast. So there you go, do it on your podcast. Sometimes what you guys don't know, Slices is that Scary will pitch something for the morning show and that's so terrible. Elvis will say, do it on your do what I'm doing your podcast? No, He'll say, do it on the Brooklyn Boys, And I'll say, oh god, no, do it on your other podcast, Scary. We so ship rolls downhill. Well for years, I mean you know, we've I've been I've been with Elvis now for twenty five years. Any time that an idea didn't make it through, would you do? Do it on your own show? Do it on your show? Do it on your show? To me, Yeah right, Brody would get that we all, you know, do it on your show. That's fine. I mean, you know it is his show, so so and quite honestly, you know, if if this wasn't gonna be the Brooklyn Boys, I was gonna name this podcast Scary Jones own show. So we just do it on your own show. It's my own show, right, but something better? Is that what you were gonna do? You had a backup plan in case I didn't. I was reading the podcast, Well, I had other ideas in mind with other people, which I'm not even gonna say anything about right now. Really, yeah, because it wasn't your It wasn't your first choice. You were my We were my first choice, and I know other people, the other people that I was going, I'm not gonna say it because that person does. You gotta tell me that person doesn't know there my second choice. Well, what if I quit right now, then we'll all find out who your second choice was? Would you still pick them? Would you still pick them as your second choice? Which is why reveal it, because then they're gonna be like, fuck you man, I want to be on your podcast now and I don't need that? Was it? The Jersey Kid. We're just gonna leave it right there. No, it was the Jersey Kid. No, the Jersey Kid is the reason why this podcast that launched, because it's freed up my time. By the way, speaking of the Jersey Kid, you used to do a podcast with him called The off Air Show. Yes, and we left all a hundred and forty seven episodes of the Off Air Show on this channel channel channel right. I didn't realize that episode. Uh, we actually talked about Brody and Scary. Scary and Brody and this podcast a little bit. Yes, I didn't remember that I did, which is why I've always said it's Scary and Brody. Because I invited you to be part of this podcast and do his podcast. No, no, I'm not gonna have that fight again. But you invited me to be part of the old podcast, and I said, hell no, so you so you went and rediscovered episode one of our listeners, one of our listeners tweeted at us. Uh. In fact, the Brooklyn Boys Quotes guy tweeted a quote from that episode, which I guess you didn't see even though you were tagged in it. Because you know, you're a very popular man. You have a lot of a lot of tweets. Um, But it was reminding us of that discussion on the off air show episode. Okay, I didn't realize that. I don't think the Jersey Kid was in the room on that one. He was not. It was just it was just us, I think and and share. Yeah, it was three of us. Yeah, I do remember that. I do remember that. But yeah, so so go listen to that episode. We still get credit for Yeah, we get credit for everything on the channel. If you want to go back to the beginning, have a party. But it might not speaking of speaking of getting credit, So we have a way of tracking as you guys know how many listens we get every episode, and you know, if we're if we're telling the truth, which we always do. Our podcast is nowhere near the top fifteen anymore. On the I Heart Radio podcast list. We dropped down to like forty fifty. Um, and so scary thinks people aren't listening to comedy podcasts. They're all listening to coronavirus podcasts and political podcasts. And that may be slightly true. However, one of our episodes in the past six was not doing very well. Uh, it had less listens than other ones. And sometimes Scary will tell you he believes it's because of the title. If we put a sexual title in or something really funny, they tend to get a little more listeners from people kind of you know, skimming by listener that may not be a listener. They're not really a self. But so three or four, three or four weeks ago, we did an episode about how Scary's parents won't come to have brunch with him because it was too far. It was before the whole lockdown. They didn't want to drive, it was traffic, and Scary came up with a very clever title. Yea. The title of the episode was Scary U Scari's uh mom is a mother bruncher, right, which is a it's sort of punny, it's cute whatever. Well, that episode wasn't getting a lot of listens, so I changed the title to Scary's mom sucks, and wouldn't you know it, the listenership of that episode has skyrocketing. Are you kidding me? Are you serious? Yeah? Did you really do that? Yes? I did, And so a couple of people tweeted me saying, I see what you did. They're very funny, and so they went back and listened to the episode again to see why your mom sucks. Oh my god, that's hilarious. But actually, if you think about it, that is more in your face then a pun like mother bruncher. Yeah, she sucks. If that doesn't work, I may change it to scaryes Mom's having sex or scariest mom gives good, gives good something, just to spice it up a little bit, scaries mom's kids. So all right, we'll see. All right, we got to change all the titles. Now, Yeah, the scary mom is a skank and I haven't changed any titles since we went to commercial. Are you sure about that? I'm I'm looking at I'm looking on my phone. All right, Hey, I want to give an update to all my time at Walgreens. Um, if you remember the last episode, I talked about the drive through and the blue bucket of grossness but whatever, we called it the blue bucket of death. And so this yesterday I went into Walgreens to pick up a prescription and I had to buy a couple of the things, and so I didn't want to go through the drive through because I wanted it to look for the other items I needed. And so I went into the store and the pharmacy when you got to pick up your prescription. You can see the drive through person talking to the drive through people. So I remembered about last week how the guy didn't have gloves on and he put all the stuff in the blue bin of death. So I said to her, I said, hey, have a question, because I told the guy and he's like, oh, great, idea. I'll put everything in the bag so people don't have to reach into the blue bin of death. So I said, hey, I have a question, miss. Are you guys still using the blue bin of death in the drawer? She didn't understand the reference, but she said, don't worry. We sanitize it every day because we put people's change in there and they have to stick their hand in, right. So I feel bad people show up at seven o'clock at night when everyone's been through there and they haven't sanitize it for the day yet, because I do it in the beginning of the day, right. So I said to her, well, I was here five days ago, and I recommend that there's some guy with glasses that you should put everything in the bag, the change, the receipts, the credit cards. Wouldn't that be easier right, and she said, oh, that's a good idea. I'm gonna tell people, Dude. I guarantee if I go in there tomorrow, they're still gonna be putting the ship in the Of course they are, because it would be too difficult to change their system. Even if this woman changed, which I doubt she will, She's not gonna tell her co workers. It's like when you call a company and you say, hey, there's a problem with your website. Why don't you have your website do this? And they go, oh, we'll we'll make a note of that and we'll get that to the higher ups right away. They are doing the jerking off motion with their hand as they're talking to you. Nobody tells anybody, Nobody takes your ideas and runs with them. So not only did the guy last week put my credit card in the blue bin at death that I had to reach in and scrape it off the bottom, but this woman threw loose change in the bin that she could have just thrown in the bag. She threw it in the bin, and now people have to reach in with their bare hands and dig around for You wonder why people are are getting coronavirus because they're the blue bin of death. I mean, that's how could you not leave your house and think about everything like it is so in the It is so in the front of my brain, and I'm so like conscious, super conscious to everything that I'm touching. Am I touching my face? This door handle I just touched. I'm walking to my car door. There's the handle. Did anybody touch my car handle? Did I? You know? Besides me? You know, these are the things I'm thinking about. I'm relentlessly, endlessly thinking the second I step out of these doors. How could you not so of death? And the place where where sick people go, which is a pharmacy, and they've got they're reaching their fucking grubby hands in there. How could how could not everybody, not only you know, beside yourself say something as well, like how did I go out? I go out every day in a long in a in a in a shirt with a with a shirt pocket, and I put my credit card in the pocket so I don't have to reach into my wallet, right, So I used the credit card, I wipe it down immediately. I'm wearing gloves, and this way I don't have to keep taking my wallet out of my pocket. And maybe getting you know, some some kind of germs on the on the wallet. So I'm thinking ahead, right, So I took my daughter a Starbucks. Who there's a drive through Starbucks not far from us, because they're the only one is open, and the lines are incredibly long because everybody knows that, you know, there's only a couple open. And I get to the drive through and the guy had put a regular lid on my my coffee drink. And he's not wearing gloves, by the way, very important I mentioned that. And again I could see his coworkers all have gloves on, but he's the guy handling the money and handing you the drinks. No gloves. Okay, So that is a prime coronavirus contact point right there. He's on the front lines of this ship. He's handing me a Corona Chino. That's what he's handing me with a with a latte virus on a latte virus. So I said to him, hey, man, um, keep in mind, I want to say at the end of the story, I put a two dollar tip in a little bin, which is ridiculous in a drive through to have a bucket of money sitting there that someone's not gonna grab it and drive off. I've said that before. Anyway, I gave him a nice tip. So I said, hey, do you have a sippy lid, because I'd rather use a sippy lid then the straw if I can help it, right, He says, sure, no problem, and he reaches into the stack of sippy lids and he puts it in the palm of his hand with his fingers touching yours. Right. No, no, no, no, He's got his hand his fingers on the underside of the lid, which is gonna touch my coffee, so I said, So, I said, excuse me, I don't mean to be to offend you, but you're about to hand me a lid with your bare hands touching the park that's gonna touch my coffee. Might you be able to grab the lid from the sides and pass it along? So he says, oh, no problem, and he grabs the lid with like you know the claw machines in the arcades, where they reached down and clawed with your fingers down. He clawsed the He now clawsed the cup. I wanted him to do a C, like a horizontal C. Right reached the sides of the cup which I could wipe. Maybe he clawsed the lid so that, like you said, the sippy part is now touching the palm of his hand as he hands me the lid. And I said, so, I said, you know what, just give me the straw. Fuck the turtles. I don't want coronavirus. And so I'm sorry, but you're getting a straw because I don't want the sippy lid from Captain Coronas and and maybe maybe the U when he grabbed them. You know, you know there's a stack of lids. They're all like stuck together. He probably his finger his dirty fingernails, like grab grab the top one. He's handling cash, right, He's handling cash all day. So that was what's today? Uh Saturday? That was Thursday. Yesterday? My daughter and I went back. Right now. I hear him on the intercom again, right, I hear him, Uh take my order. So I said to my door, goddamn, if this guy's touching on my lips again, And she's like, Dad, don't get mad at him. I was like, I wasn't that nasty to him yesterday. I gave him a nice tip, but he better not man handle my coffee again. So we get there. He's still on the headset, but he's about six ft from the window. Now he's standing next to the woman. But the woman who's actually handing the drinks out has big purple gloves on and she's being sanitary. So it looks like they took Captain Corona off of window details and just kept them on the headset. They probably got so many complaints about him. Yeah, so he obviously, you know, maybe you can't work the the headset and with gloves on. So they had another woman working the uh, the handoff, and I said something to her. I said, hey, I'm glad you're here today wearing gloves. Thank you. And she took it like, you know, she had to look on her face like I'm a hero. And I didn't want to tell her, Hey, man, you're not a hero, but thanks you for not killing me. So she'll call him on Monday looking for a shout at. Yeah, what about the Starmucks drive for women who are wearing gloves? Were heroes? We are heroes. We're not zeros like Mr Filthy Grimy Fingertip, Guy Handley. All your lives at the same time. You know what, proty you should have quit while you were head because if you think about it, the original lid that he grabbed that first time out hit your hot coffee. The hot coffee kills the germs. Hot coffee isn't two hundred degrees. It would have been a lot better. You would have have been a lot better than that right right there, than him man going on to man handle your sippy cup lip part. Well, that's why I kept the original straw lid, because that was already on there, and he didn't make the drinks. All right, Next time, walk up with your own cup and have them poor have them pour the coffee from one cup over the window, and then and then let them. Yeah, you come with your own cup and lid, and you literally have them pour their cup of coffee into your cup of coffee. And then you go away. You drive you're done. Yeah, I'm sure there's problems with that too, but all right, and then you stick your hand in the tip jar and drive off with the cash. Yeah. Hey, did you see The New York Post had an article twenty one year old Tennessee girl or woman was bragging on social media about not taking the coronavirus outbreak seriously, posting pictures of herself at parties, hanging out, saying I'm not afraid, I'm not worried. I'm young, I'm not gonna quarantine anyway. She got the coronavirus. She said, it feels like someone is sitting on my chest. It's hard to breathe. I coughed and so much my throat was bleeding. Now I'm not happy about this story, but it's just a reminder everyone can get it. Don't act like you can't because you're younger than than you think. Is is affecting people, So everyone, and that includes people having no that includes people having weddings. Okay, just because you're at a three D four hundred person wedding, that doesn't mean that you're immune because everyone's in party mode and the bride and groom have to get married. You know what, Stop being fucking selfish. Stop it. They had a Lakewood, New Jersey on Thursday night, the third one third time they had a break up a wedding and had like three or four hundred people at it. And listen, I understand certain people are religious in a certain direction or any direction. You got you, but you know what they're people are sacrifice? What the sacrifice means, that's why we're all doing this together, because I'll be damned if I'm gonna be sitting here through fucking July in quarantine as the rest of the world won't stay the funk home. And again, we're not talking about people that have to go to work. No, we're not talking about talking about talking about people that are so self centered and so selfish that they continue to have a huge wedding celebration like they did and the police had to break it up. This was on Thursday night in Lakewood, New Jersey. True story, you can google it. They broke up this fucking wedding because everyone there. Well, first of all, shame on the bride and groom and the family for going through with it and and and putting all those people at risk. And they had one in Staten Island last week also that night, like we don't care, we don't care, We're just gonna have the fucking wedding because we're more important than the rest of the country. We're right. That's no, you're not centered. That's the seld that's the self centered bullshit that in the New York, New Jersey area. Yes, I mean we are in a pandemic at the highest level here in this area. And if you can do anything to keep from killing somebody, you're not more important, You're not so. I posted a video yesterday. Uh, please go on my Twitter at David Brody and take a look at it from us. It was a montage of people uh in a Hershey, Pennsylvania, UM, nursing home, uh, pleading with people to lower the curve, stay home, save their lives. Um. And that's that's that's it's very powerful. But you know it was not just old people. We lost a friend of our morning show this week, Floyd Cards, who was a Indian chef who not only brought up food to our morning show, ran restaurants all over the world, but used to come to every charity event and cook and provide food for our kids with cancer events. Um. He died this week at fifty nine. He was healthy. Now, I know, if you're twenty five, you're like old. No, it really isn't think about how old your parents are. And if you want them to die because you were at a wedding, you gotta go hang out with your bros at the beach because your friend Dave said come over and play cards. Well, now Dave. But I was saying earlier on well, I wasn't outing my buddy Dave, who wanted to have me over for dinner. And we've and Anthony, the three of us have been in quarantine all this time. So what it's like, So okay, But but again I'm still not gonna take them up on the offer. But but I'm talking. I'm specifically referring to people that are continuing to have large celebrations and gatherings of zero fox given. And you know what those are the people, and those are the communities where it's running rampant the most. Well they had um Now, some people would call it a violation of privacy, but there's a company that tracks cell phones. Um they can track cell phone usage. And they had a satellite images you know how like you have um UH. They can track like heating the building and it shows up red right. They can see like where bodies are in the building. So they're able to track lights on this particular map that represents cell phone usage. And they showed the beaches of Florida for spring break and they were completely lit up, all compacted, really tight um lit up with people on cell phones and and hanging out right. And then as soon as springbreak ended, they tracked the cell phones and watched all the cell phone usage in South Florida disappear and travel on planes and cars and all almost all of it ended up in the Northeast, from Ohio to Boston from people who flew down there. And now what happens all those people from the beaches that were, hey, we're having a good time, we're young, we don't care. They're all back now in our area, now spreading that virus to people who are out on the streets um playing basketball or whatever. And by the way, it got so bad in New York this week that the mayor had to take down uh he ordered to take down every basketball from all the parks because people were still going and playing full contact basketball when they're supposed to be quarantined and keeping their distance from each other. Speaking of keeping your distance, what would you do in this situation? So shop right near my house is doing a really they weren't doing a mostly good job keeping people apart, right, So what they did was they rope. They put a rope in front of all of the registers and then at the left side of the store, facing the front is an entrance to get online behind the rope right, and then on the floor they put tape every six ft so that you would win online. Every six ft you wouldn't be near the person in front or behind you. Right, so one person would be in the front, and then there were one person at the front of the line who worked at Shopwright, who would wave you on to go to the next register. This way you weren't in line behind someone on the register, like crammed up against them. They were keeping people spaced apart. Well. At some point when I was online, four employee is of shop right, and I'm shouting out shop right. Four employees of shop right stood about six ft from the end of the where the line was beginning, where the where the first person in line would stand, two on the left side, two on the right. And so when they called you to go to your register, and none of them are wearing gloves or masks, by the way, you had to walk through them like you were in like a bridal celebration, like right, like here comes the bride, and like people stand like you know you walk between them. So you basically with your shopping cart had about six inches of separation on both sides of you as you walked through the four of them talking, when the whole purpose of this line was to keep you separated from everybody else. So I turned around and I said, excuse me, what's the point of this line? And they said to keep people separated. I said, what's the point of the tape on the floor to keep people six ft apart? So can you tell me, based on those facts, why I to walk through the four of you to get to the register when you guys are six inches away from me. And they all had a dumb look on their face with no answer. So you know what, fuck you shop right for doing a half fast job of keeping people safe. You made it look good, and then you're fucked up by making me walk through a line of four people like like like here comes the bridest plan or I'm in a military presented uh present us procession procession. I'm so flustered, you know, and I'm thinking, like, you're gonna kill me while you're trying to help me. Fuck you. So I went up to the help desk, the customer service desk after I rang up my groceries, and I asked that question. She said, oh, that's a good point. You know what, that's gonna get me the same thing it got me in Walgreens. It's never gonna get mentioned to anybody, and it may actually get your coronavirus. Yeah, you might get that as a bonus for free. Hey, here's your free here's your free dessert, Christine. Items you're less. You can get on the express line. Express line to the hospital. No, thank you. So be careful out there, people when you're going to places that are trying to keep you safe, and make sure they're actually keeping you safe. Between the blue bin of death and Captain coronavirus claw hands at Starbucks and the weddings where there are four hundred people there and they don't give a ship about any pandemic going on because they just want to celebrate with everybody and have a good time. Okay, now I got one more story for you and then we're getting out of here. I'm not gonna do that my Bluetooth story until next episode, because I wanted to talk about, uh, the guy at the pizza place that he was trying to kill me. So there's a place in my area that has pretty good pizza, but they also sell um slices that are a blatant rip off of lmb's Pemony Gardens upside down Cicilian slice where the cheese is on the bottom and the sauces on top with a little grated cheese on top. So my wife says, hey, let's get pizza tonight. I'll place the order, you go pick it up now. All the places are delivery only, right. So I get there and I parked right in front. It's in a strip mall, and there's a guy inside the store with a baseball hat on, and the guy working inside who knows me, he says, Hi, goes you're fully ready about fifteen minutes. So I stand outside by my car and the guy in the hat says, oh, beautiful day. YEP, it really is. And he says, you know, if this was a regular day, yesterday would have been opening day for baseball, and we'll be watching baseball, counting runs and hits and errors. But instead what counting cases of coronavirus? So I said, uh yeah, uh huh, And he takes a foot closer to me, so I back up a little bit. He says, are you a baseball fan? Yes, I am. He says you're probably a Yankee fan, aren't you, I said, no, actually a Mets fan. Oh you're a Mets fans, so am I. So he starts talking about the Mets, and as he's talking to me, he's getting closer. So I backed up a little more. At what point is he gonna make fellow Mets fan give me a hug? Oh no, no, you're right. Let me look hole. So now he's in the he's in the doorway of the pizza place, and the guy behind him in the pizza I love people that they just can't take a hint. They just don't know you're doing now visual body language clues, you don't know some backing up and I'm like, uh yeah, I keep doing that. Uh yeah. So we're talking Mets and the guy behind him now who works there is now my wife placed in order for like my chicken, palm hero and some pizza for the kids whatever. So I asked him, hey, can I add an upside down slice to my order? He says, I'm not ringing it up. You already paid for It's on me. I'll heat it up for you. So he's standing behind the guy now behind the counter with my pizza in his hand, you know, like the plate, Like, hey, your pizza is ready. So I'm looking him, going I'll get it in a minute, because I can't walk past the guy. He's in the doorway. So so the pizza I was gonna eat while I was waiting for my food to be ready, I can't get to. So he's going on for a few minutes, and I'm backing up, backing up, And now he says, you're a Mets fan, you probably agree with me politically. What are your thoughts on blah blah blah. So I say, well, I kind of agree with you blah blah blah. And he says his eyes light up, Oh you don't like that either, and what about this and this political thing and that political thing. And I'm like, yeah, well, you know, you know blah blah blah. Times are tough. And every time I agree with him, he walks closer to me. So at this point, I opened my car door, so the card door is between me and the guy in the hat, and so I figured the door will be will be like a clue. I want him to stay away from me. So he walks up to the car door. As he's talking to me, he's all excited, and I agree with him on sports and politics. So, by the way, my wife says, you should have told me you're a Yankee fan and lied about your political views so he wouldn't talk to you anymore. I said, he just would have argued with me. Then I was trying to yes and the death. So finally my food's ready and it's all on the counter. I gotta go pick it up. I said, hey, man, uh, I gotta get my pizza. He goes, oh, go right ahead. But he's standing between me and the place and my car door and the car next to me. So I go around. I go around my door. I leave my car door open because I can't close my car door without getting closer to him. So I go and get the boxes of food. Now I've got a stack of four boxes and a chicken palm hero and my slice of pizza on top. And he says, oh, say anyway, as I was saying, I said, sir, I no offense. I said, I got old people in my family. I'm really worried about getting coronavirus. Can we keep six ft apart? Oh, yeah, no problem. I don't know what I was thinking. And he backs up about three ft and then says to me, I was thinking of coming up with a dawn leash that's exactly six ft long and rigid, so you always know people are six ft away. So I said, well, I'm pretty sure we're not, So if you could just give me three more ft, I would really like to get to my car. Yeah, no problem. So, anyway, did you see what so and so said on television yesterday? You know what I did, but I don't want to die, so if you can please step back? And he he goes, oh, no problem. I don't know what I was thinking, brain fart. And then as I'm putting the stuff in my passenger seat, he's like coming around my car to keep talking to me. So I slammed the passenger door closed, and I go back around on my car door that's still open, and he's I closed the door and he's knocking on my window. He's like, oh, one more thing. I go. No, I gotta go. He's like, yeah, but I wanted to tell you about so and so. No I know I have a phone. Wow. Wow, this guy is pouring it on, pouring it on. So well, it's like it's like you're catching up with an old friend that you haven't seen all these years. You just met this guy. I just I don't know who he was. He's some guy in the pizza place. Pizza place, Pete, like if he wanted to kill me, and he was, and the guy, I gotta be honest with you, he's like sixty sixty five years old, you know, with a scruffy gray beard. It wasn't like he was twenty one like company. Yeah, I get that. You could shout it to me. Don't come close to me. Ah, so you play the police. Don't stand so close to me. No, yeah, I thought about that. Starting on the show perfect, I suggested we start to show with mc hammer the other day. Don't touch this. You can't touch you can't touch this. I can't touch this. Yeah, he's a place, pizza place, Pete. Man, Just stay at your house, just stare away for he doesn't get a fuck you because he he meant well, he just didn't realize what's going on. Did And like I said, we agreed on everything. The problem was if it was like every time I stepped back, you know, anyway, my family is home legitimately now, so we gotta end this thing. Hit the jingle man. Oh, by the way, we are doing the podcasts from my place next week, you're coming here, right, Okay, Dave gotta go. No, really, come on now the dogs are barking. Yeah, well, you know what I would sooner go to bos