#290: Brody Couldn't Stop Staring At Skeery's Crack

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Speaker 1: Start up, dot up, start up, Brooklyn Boys, start up, Brooklyn Boys.

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Speaker 2: Start up, dot up, dot up.

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Speaker 1: They making noise, dot up, start up, dot up up, dot us dot up.

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Speaker 2: Episode to ninety of the Brooklyn Boys podcast, What's going On? Scary Jones. That's David Brody yep, first time listener. Come oncome aboard, Come on. It would be nice to know that ever with every episode we've we've gained another ten twenty one hundred and fifty one thousand listeners. Wouldn't that be awesome? It would be And I'd like to I'd like the three or four people that leave us every every episode or every few episodes, they just, you know, give us a parting gift on your way out. Let us know what happened. Your life changed, your commute changed, you know, Okay, yeah, it happens. We're on a stretch of really dreary weather here in the Northeast. The last few days it's been a monsoon. I'm so angry because I'm supposed to go to the met game tonight. Courtesy of Elvis Duran and his husband Alex Yep, dude, yep, upper deck seats right. I was about to say when Elvis Duran goes out to the ballgame. Elvis Duran goes out to the ballgame. I mean he pulls no punches. I mean he buys. He even pays the guy to sit next to him to explain what's going on. I'll tell you, we were supposed to go, and we were supposed to We were supposed to explore all that wonderful food. These are the TVs, Brody, These are the TV seats he got us. He bought us TV seats, the one you know that you know that the fifty seats that on every baseball game. There's only like about a few seats that you see on television seats off to the left of the TV screen. Right, he got him in the middle right and there in the center right. So I was so I was gonna say, stoked, what year is this? I was so pumped, amped, pumped, amped, juiced. It was a vibe for this and the debut of the twenty twenty four City Field food lineup, which includes Brody. It should be a Legal Cookies rainbow cookie egg roll or a rainbow cookie egg roll from a walk and roll. I hear they slay the rainbow cookie is if you're you know that's what we're talking about. That seven layer Italian cookie that is the first one to be removed. Vibe. Yeah, the one. You know, the whole stack of Italian cookies comes out in the cellophane to open a cellophane, and all four of them that are there are gone immediately because everyone goes for the rainbow cookie, the seven layer whatever you want to call it. Anyway, they have this cookie to visualize it to the slices. It's it's a seven layer the rainbow Italian cookie inside a egg and circled in an egg roll. So yeah, so the cross cut is a fried egg roll shell and with the cookie inside. First quarter is a second quarter scary coming live they do. Yeah, Also they Adam Richmond. Isn't he a former Brooklyn guy? Isn't he worked at Red Robin with me? Red Robin Adam Adam Richmond had been to my house for some house parties that my roommate throw. Apparently a Brooklyn guy. I reached out to him. He didn't remember me or that I ever happening, but he did. He worked there. Well, food network guy. He's got some food in there as well as I think chef Ann Burrell, David Chang is he? Or is that Yankee Stadium? That the Momofuku guy? Is it Yankee? Watch your mouth mom? The fried Chicken sandwich famous? These are all Food Network things. Anyway, I'm a foody. I love this ship and I couldn't wigh. Eating a lot of food doesn't make you a foody, but go on, Yeah, but eat, But knowing the chefs who are behind these that makes you a chefy A chefy a chefy. Okay, I knew a lot of the chefs. I used to again, I used to work for Jeffrey Z Carrion. I know food. I know what. I'm a chef. I'm friends with Bobby Flay. You meet Bobby fla No, never heard of him? So I love Bobby. So yeah, I mean I was ready. I was so excited. And by that there's a whole list of foods. We're not going to go into it. But anyway, No, don't sleep on the other stuff either. It's fantastic, But uh, that was gonna be no game. It was gonna be no game tonight. And that there's no makeup. Well there's a makeup, but not with your tickets. They don't count to that tomorrow. So that's my question. We came to the conclusion that as a result of the rain out tonight and I with any game you want, but the Yankee game. Well hold on, no, no, no, they get the vouchers. You know, Alex, Elvis's husband gets the voucher for the future game of his choice. But he doesn't necessarily have to take you. He could take or does he. That's my question, Brody, No, he doesn't. In fact, he has three vouchers. He can go three different games by himself if he wants. I know, I see no guarantee. You didn't own that ticket. You never got the time. I know I was invited to this game here on Wednesday, April third, Right, do you realize you need to be nice to Alex at least until you arrive at your next game with these tickets. No, it's not that you wouldn't be nice to Alex anyway. I mean it's a quandary. No, I mean, he don't owe me anything really if you think about it. But no, what's the proper etiquette here, Brodie? The etiquette is you need to be nice to him so that he says I was gonna take Scary to the game. I'll continue to take them. No, but do you think you wait until like one of his friends is like that sounds like fun. I'd love to go like, oh, Josh, you're in not close to boy Josh different Josh, Josh could go to the game instead of you. You're not guaranteed anything. They may have been asking me because well, Dana wants to go to a game. Well that's what I'm saying. I'm fucked right. I'm not gonna keep menching names of people. But they have a lot of friends. They have a lot of friends. Help us and Alex have a lot of close friends. If he decides, do you know the work associate, I want to use these three vouchers in June. In June and hey, guess what, Oh my best friend Marissa has I'm just making a name. Maissa has off. Hey, Massa, And what if it's during vacation when you're away, Oh you have an appearance? Well you know me. I always should be that dream mall that dream, American dream, American injury. Don't call it them all. Don't call it a comeback. By the way, speaking of song lyrics, just see the video I sent you the Kesha song She's like wake up in the morning feel and like Pete Diddy and then the cops bust in. I said you that you didn't see it's a video of Kesha's singing from her video and then a clip of cops down the door. Well well yeah, so anyway, I don't know if I'm certainly not entitled to the ticket, but no, you're not. You're act appreciative. I've exposed my I'm exposed here because something tells me that, you know, if they plan it on a day that I'm not available, then I'm just gonna be out of luck and then just go on to the next person to go to the game. Oh so, clock, you got it. Lucky, you got invited this time. You may not get invited the second time. I know. Damn it. Look looking forward to seeing on TV. Anyway, all right, so we'll then we'll go to another game. I guess all right. Hey, By the way, I did a shout out last week that I needed people to follow me on TikTok because I need to get to a thousand followers so I can go live and do more things on TikTok. And I want to thank the forty of you that did that for me. That was very nice of you, including Juan Vasquez, Millennial Trucker, Ben Millennia, a Benjagment. Over a lot of people were kind enough to follow me. Rock and Steve followed me. Thank you Rock and Steve. But of the I'm sure Rock and Steve is going to leave some explotives in your comments. Well, I always want to go of his videos. That's he's the real deal man. He is who he says he is. He's definitely an animated character. But I would like a little more of the minions. The thousands of slices, tens of thousands of millions, minion minions. Yeah's derogatory term. Absolutely not not It's not a minion. I'm David Brody and you all are my minions. If you're if your Jewish, a minion is part of a prayer circle. It just means followers, friends, it means it means people close to you. Really, you're using in a different You're using it to say minions like peasants, my minions. No, I'm not using it that way. Slices either, you're not on TikTok. You haven't heard me ask last week because you're buying a few episodes so, but I can use the help out. David Brody twelve on TikTok. I could use the help as well, Scary at Scary Jones, please follow me on TikTok. You have like twenty six followers? What do you have? Not many? Man? I gotta a lot. Is it is it time to like move over from Instagram to TikTok as my name? No? No, but but Twitter is I have? I have something like forty six thousand followers on Twitter, which is not a lot. And I've lost a bunch since I'm out on the show anymore. And that's whatever it is. Why do that? They would just say, eh, you know what, out of site, out of mind. Yeah, but I used to tweet and I would get you know, one thousand impressions, you know, thirty comments, twenty comments whatever. Yeah. Now it's like you tweet five hundred people see it, three hundred people see it. You're on the other side of the hill, David Brody. I'm not on the other side of the house, lie. Twitter is on the other side of the hill. Okay, now you're finally coming to my side. What did I tell you? Twitter is dead? Hold on? I love Twitter for information. I love Twitter for reading posts, but as far as posting and interacting, interactions are down unless you you're there's way too much bots. Yeah, Twitter slots that have and again they all have forty four forty five hundred followers and under one hundred people following them. That Twitter should be the same accounts to just follow each other's lists. Twitter ship has sailed in my opinion, but that's just my opinion. Well, Tesla stock is down a big time this month that their profits are down fifteen percent, So Elon's not having a good a couple of months. No, poor guy, what's he gonna do with his one hundred billion instead of one hundred and one billion? Okay, oh, we got to take a quick break. But no, I caught Brody doing something really, really salacious and shady at my house. Brody came over, and Brodie came over my house. I did, and I saw you with your fucking phone out in my bathroom. You didn't see me in the bathroom because the door was closed. Most you have a camera. No, you came out of my bathroom and you turned the corner and your phone was in your hand. Let let me we'll get into this next. Hold on hold, Yeah, we'll discuss this. It's I think we should start off by saying that I was at your house on Monday, April. First, that's right, which is a big part of this story. But and this is not an April Fool's joke, nor was that it involved in an April Fools joke. One hundred percent right, but you So we'll get to why he was here in this se But my first question is when you come out of a bathroom holding a phone, I think that's disgusting because to me, all that means is you went into you went in the bathroom, you did something weird with your phone, or you're holding your phone, and it's it's unsanitary. So I feel like your phone should be in your pocket for the time that you're in and the bathroom. Walked into the bathroom with your phone, put it down on the counter, no peede, and then wash your hands and put your phone back up. All disgusting? How is that disgusting? Gross? Your hands touched everything I just mentioned. I put the phone down on your sink counter. The phone should count gross. The phone should be in your pocket. You go into a bathroom phone your pocket at your phone when you're on a toilet, you never scroll and poop. You never get on the phone. I've been on the phone with you when you've been in the bathroom. Who are you kidding? No, no, no, no, no. Hold on a second, wait wait, wait, wait, my life. If I go, if I go to a public restroom like at work, not a public your friend's bathroom, anywhere, I don't feel the need to pull my phone out out of my pocket. If I'm going in a rush. It's just it's just weird. I don't think this is what the main thing I do. When I'm sitting on a toilet. If I'm taking a dump, I'm opening That's when I open my mail. To me, I fucking hate mail. I hate so I let my mail stack up. Hold on a second. I let my mask stack up for about a week, a week or so, on your table wherever. Yeah. And then and then if I'm going into the bathroom I need to pass some time. I take the stack of mail. I have a garbage pail next to the toilet, and I start open up envelopes and I start reading things, and I'm like, oh, rip this up, throw this out, okay, And and most of it goes in the garbage. Because paper mail aside from aside from a check that they're handing me. If I have to catch a check which is very rare, doesn't need to be opened. Uh, you know, it doesn't need to be opened anywhere else. Waste of time to put slices are screaming at their phones at right now. So mail originated, it's either from a person who touches the mail, handles the mail, licks the envelope right, licks a stamp. Then the mail goes to the post office where a hundred people touch it and and and fondle it with their dirty hands. Then it goes through dirty machines. Then a male carrier with his bare hands here her her bare hands, his or her bare hands. Yeah, touches your mail, puts it in your dirty mail box. Still got to problem it. You take it that that dirty infested mail that's been all over the country and everyone's touched it. You touch it, then you touch your dick to pee and wipe and your ass, and you think that's more sanitary than taking out your own phone, putting it down on a clean porcelain counter which is not porous and doesn't have germs in it, washing your hands and picking your phone up again. You think you're in better shape. Well, I think that if I'm opening my mail, yes, my hands are becoming dirty. Okay, great. The next thing I do is wipe my ass. And right after that, yeah, you have to pee. No, you don't touch your dick at all, never, not really p But if I'm wiping my ass, and then I washed my hands, and now it's now it's I hit the reset button. My hands were dirty already. My hands are about to get dirty, you know. So so what's the difference down on the toilet with dirty hands? You you infest them with mail infestation, and then you touch your private areas with mail dirt. But I'm the problem because I touched my phone after I washed my hands. I just thought it was gross. What were you doing in the bathroom with your phone out? My phone was out on the table when we was signing shirts and hats and and oh my, which leads us to that part of the conversation. I walked into the bathroom with my phone out. I have a giant Galaxy phone. I'm not gonna put it in my pocket to open my pants. So I put on the counter because you were distracted so when I came back out, I knew I would have time to be on the phone. I pull my pants down with my phone in the pocket, and that's where it stays. What do you have to take your phone out of your pocket because the pocket flaps fall down and the phone jumps out. Sometimes it never happens to me. Okay, but anyway, but anyway, what were you doing? And I'll be honest with you. I took the cat. I'm out. They take a picture of your sink, that's why. And I was gonna take a picture of all your bougie toilet trees as a bit. So let's talk about the crack and your sink. Scary asked to me like three years ago what it would cost to redo his bathroom because it was falling apart. It was all and outdated, and it looks like nineteen seventy eight. It's all browns and yellows. It's like the Brady Bunch. Anyway, I happen to notice there's a giant like seven inch crack in his sink in the thing. Looked at it. What the right in the white along the bah? The countertop's not the sink. People know what the sink is okay, there's a giant crack in the sink. So I assume Scary knows about the crack. Of course I do. And under the sink. He doesn't have a pedestal sink. He's got a sink with a cabinets in storage. So I opened the cabinet up and I see this toilet paper right under the crack, so I know it's April. First, I walk out because I have to go put put money in my meter. I've go downstairs. I say, hey, Scary, listen, I'm gonna put money in my meter because it's in the cause outside it to go add time to the whatever. And uh, just so you know, I'm sure, I said, I'm sure you know this. But I heard a dripping sound and you sink and it's dripping, and I open your cabinet and all the toilet paper rolls are wet. I said, how long has that cracked been there? And he's like, oh, the housekeeper cracked it. Well, you have water under the sink. He's like, no fucking way, and he ran into the bathroom. So as he's run into the bathroom, I go out to put money in the meter and then I get a text message, you're a dick, yeah, because he fell for it. Well all right, well here's why I fell for it, because you cost You're an April fool. No because a long time ago, well not in a long time ago, a galaxy far far away. No no, no, no, no, I'm gonna go back a few months. I cracked your sink the part where there was a flood under my sink and everything got soaking wet, and I had to bring everything out, throw three quarters of the shit away, wipe the bottom. It was a night. There was a good April, right, because the sink, the sink, the water was caught in the you know, where's the part where it curves up. That thing got loose on something whatever. Water was leaking out of that thing, and I had to have my guys come up and they had to take care of it, and they had to like put some calk in there out of what do you put the white putty shit, whatever, glue, whatever, he goes, that'll never happen again. So I fast forwarded in my mind. I'm like, holy shit, I'm like, is it happening again? So yeah, but the crack is cosmetic. It's not going to affect anything. Under you still went in at a checket. Well, I did because I thought maybe something gave way. I don't know, That's why I looked and I did follow. How do you not know what that curved pipe is called? What do you call that thing? It's a macaroni pipe? Is that right? Yes? Because it looks like elbow macaroni. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. I'm not a plumber anyway, all right, So so yeah, so my cleaning lady I felt so bad. Estella she's like she cracked. I have like one of those giant soap dispensers that all you have, Estella. It's made, at least it Ostella like Estella stuff made. It's made a big marble, frigging heavy soap dispenser. She was cleaning the sink one day and it slipped out of her hands and went and a cry. It bashed the sink so rock paper scissors. She was on her phone anyway, The marble is was more durable than the sink, I learned really quickly. So yeah, so that the sink is the curve part where the water goes right the basin of the sink. That you know what I'm talking about anyway, fucking hasn't been repaired. But anyway, there's money on yourself. What we're really trying to tell you here is your shirts have all been signed, your hats, and it's all been sent out, so you should be receiving them as we speak, as you listening to this podcast, or sometime by the weekend or next week if you're on the West, anticipate they went out. Wherever you live. It's this ups ground, right, it could take a month, right, Although I do I do feel bad for the people that ordered hats, the not thedad hats. Yeah, you bought the stretchy knit hats. Those are impossible to sign. First of all, there's no flat surface, and then like so we're going like over each line ten times so it shows up. But as soon as you put the hat on your head, it stretches open wide and you can't read it. So I mean, we did our best. Those are the people, the three people who beanies. They're knit hats. Yeah, they knit caps. We did our best. We tried, and everything else was very signable. So thank you for your orders. We'll all have to tell you if I'm being honest, as much as I love the slices. I don't know if I would ever do it again, and Scary is the reason why. So let me explain the process of what we had to do. Merch. Matt sent a giant me that merch to Scary's house. And what he did was Matt did a great job. He labeled all of the envelopes right pre pre labeled all the little white packages. And the white packages are the ones that have like the plastic you peel away and then you just turn flip the flap over and the seals right pull the flaps. You've gotten bags of Amazon where they don't open it the ribbon part because once that flap is down, you can't lift it. He left them all unsealed. And then inside the bags where your order with your instructions, your item, a free Brooklyn Boys sticker sheet congratulations go little bonus, complimentary, complementary, complimentary up yep. And and the bag the plastic bag, clear plastic bag that your shirt came in. So it's a clear plastic bag which has a fold over uh tab that that seals, that wasn't sealed yet, that goes in the white plastic bag that seals, and then and you bring it to the buzzloves Well. So I'm like, Scary, you could have taken them all out, signed them and I would have picked them up at your house. No, I can't get it. Come over. So I get there and we ordered lunch and ordering ordering by the way, well we'll get into how Scary order the foods. I wanted to kill him on that's a whole other break. Oh my god. So what Scary decides is he's gonna move the speed of a tortoise, and I'm going to sign and package things. So we each took five bags, and I got through all five of them and pushed into his side of the table. By the way, the table barely any room to sign because did he clear off the table. No, the stack of papers and his plant are still on the table, so there's no room to spread the sheet. So we're on a third of the table, squeezing into the edge of the round tables, on the little part of the table like a crescent, so that we can sign these shirts. So I'd like, Scary is so slow, he goes, dude, I'm being careful. I'm being careful. Scary was taking twenty seconds to make sure that the plastic on the shirt bag was perfectly folded over and all the air was pushed out. Then he has to put it into the envelope perfectly straight. Yep, it is take the white bag with the envelope the outer bag, peel the paper off and then fold the flap over straight. So I'm going through the shirts and the hats and everything, like the tank top is like crazy, and he's like, he's like, have you ever seen the show Monk? He's of a sudden, he's Adrian Monk. He's making sure that they're perfectly straight before he mets, have you ever seen the show The Odd Couple? You're Oscar Madison? You piece of ship. Rode's a fucking dumpster fire. He's a mess. He's a monster. He slices if you got and your if you ever ordered ship, if you you see that the thing is like the bag is misfolded, the flap is fucking off, and if your your your shirt was re jammed into the bag and wasn't refolded properly. That was David Brody that sealed that envelope. Okay, first of all, I did. I was trying, I know, but some of the ship got fucking creased backwards. So what I started doing, I got fucking I started screaming at him like every time, he's what are you doing? He was neurotic. He was like a crazy old lady who thinks someone stealing people's pants? People. I want good presentation. I want you know. Okay, you ever buy an Apple product? You know how an Apple product is with the box? Hold on, when you open up a computer or you open a n iPhone, how beautiful it is. Had the nice little little sticker thing, and then you pull the tad across and you still have the plastic on my new dishwasher. I still have the plastic on every record album. I have a boy. Everything you have to tell me about about keeping it clean. But here's what I started doing. Slices in front of him. I would put the shirt in the bag and then take the white flap and deliberately folded at an angle and that, and he was trying to unpeel them. But you can't do you can't unpeel it, open it. It was driving. So then I would toss them onto the pile and he would go no, and he would put the piles that'd be straight and perfect in the box. So brody, So no, one's ever gonna know that the piles Brody repacked your merch recklessly, recklessly. I mean, do you want to talk about recklessly? When you get your merchandise, you will see that my signature is beautiful and perfect and scary. Some of his letters are like, uh, two centimeters high. Some of them are six centimeters high. He didn't dot the eyes, he didn't cross all the teas. Oh, come on, lazy signer. He's no, You're not really you want to you want to apologize to Stacy now I put a little smiley face in front of everyone. Stay right, apologize to Stacy and Bill right now? What I do to Stacy and Bill? You spelled Stacy's name wrong. You had to put a scene, yes, and I had to fix it. I had to make everything darker on Stacy's name. And then you get spelled. You wrote Bill would be I lower case L, big L. I had to make the second L the first L a big L. You met And I'm not even gonna get into what you did. I can't even I hope they don't want their money back to one person. What you did? You you worried about the bags. You couldn't write your name right of people's names. I want a nice presentation when people people paid good money for that stuff, when they shows up at their house, I want them to nice oh kind of nice oh boards. You wrote personalize that you wrote, Dez. That's what you wrote, Dez. That's a personalized I wrote, right, I put, I put. I put a little drawing for Dez because I know I know what she's into. I thought you'd appreciate that. So you're talking about the bags, listen, slices, be honest. You want perfect me straight bags. What do you want? Like your name written properly and a nice signature from us? It was a nice signature. Come on, Bill Stacey. I apologize. I did my best to fix what he did. I apologize. I apologized for opening my house to this as as one. Republic One said, it's too late to apologize. It's too late, and we got to talk about your toiletries. Can we talking about your toiletries? Yeah? So that that's the question. What are you fucking knocking on? What I have hold on? I'm in the bathroom on peeing. To the left of the me is the sink with the crack and then Scary has glass doors on his shower, so you don't have to snoop. You can just look to the left for a second. And he has like twelve bottles of toilet trees on his little shelf unit that's in the shower. Can you first tell me and the slices? What are the twelve bottles? I have three daughters. They don't have that many bottles of I have a shower. I have two types of shaving cream for one for your ass. I have a mouthwash in there because I because I like to. I like to like I like to gargle my mouth wash and spit it right there in the shower water. No, I don't. I don't know what shallow now? Are you? Just you just take the mouth Well, I live alone, by the way, let's let's remind everyone of that. So I just like grab grab the bottle, all right, switch it around a little bit, and I spit it into the drain because I'm already there. Why why two shaving creams. One is Harry's, one is nice, a nice creamy shaving cream, and then the other one is Barber sal Classic. No, because when I was doing doctor fat Loss. You can hold a certain shaving cream. You can't have oil base hit it. I had to Nope, I need it. I need it. You could have look so in order to lose weight, you had to use a special shaving cream. Yeah, sell you the shaving cream at no I. You know, do you get a when you get a grocery list, you also get a product list of approval products by Barbarasol from nineteen eighty. You're supposed to use everything. You're not supposed to use oil. You're not supposed to use oil based anything on your body because it goes right to your hips. You know, it gets into your seeps, into your skin, and then your body sees it as oil. I'm telling you it's part of this Harry's for Harry's is what I normally use. That's what I want to give a shit about the oils the rest of the year. Yeah, because I'm not on the diet anymore. Doctor fellows his own cup you of poor as the rest of the year. Yeah, so you do with the barbisol. Now, if you're not on the diet, you just leave the barbisol till next year. Well, no, well, I use it occasionally whatever. But then I also how you got Now you got three products out of twelve keep going. Then I got weird chap shampoo I got I got a shampoo for Robin at the J Jason J A S O N J and the two dots over the A. So maybe Jason, I don't know shaving cream. I'm sorry that that's Johnson Joson Joson. I think a Motley Crue has the two dots over I also have I also have, isn't it uh? I also have a face wash and a bob wash for Robin, shampoo and conditioner for Robin. Those are all Robin's products. But why don't you put them on the ledge? When then I have my shampoo, my my Giovanni shampoo, and I have Giovanni shampoo, and I have Giovanni hair. Hair Gie TikTok video told you to buy Giovanni shampoo. It's a whole foods product and it's got no parabins in it. Oh, God gives you the parabins of the problem. No thing. Yeah, there's no chemicals and cress than the peanut butter makes it Giovanni shampoo. I'm just saying, hold on Giovanni shampoo. Giovanni shampoo. It's a little bit more, maybe a couple of dollars more, but it's it's animal and cruelty free, doing good things with the environment. Use the two cheek Ultra go sheet. I don't know which one it is. It's on Amazon, like it's which is whole alls, whole foods? Yeah, it's slices. Think of a number of what you pay for your shampoo. Three dollars for Suave, for prel what do you use head and shoulders? Six dollars? Okay, what are you getting at Brody? Giovanni shampoo eighteen dollars and sixty eight cents for a little bottle and the ultra sheet Moist. What is this? Thirty dollars? Oh, it says, yeah, let me read it. Let me read it. Hold on, is it green? Is your bottle green? With a P? No? It's it's it's clear. Giovanni Ultra Moist shampoo and condition is not a commercial. That must be the one gallon size. I don't know what you're talking about. Avocado and olive oil. I don't have that. That's not the one I use. Hold on creamy hydration formula enriched with ala Vera's shade butter po tentacle extracts no parabins no, no parabins. Oh my god, thank god, holy shit. You know I lost an uncle to sit on his on his headstone, here lies uncle Steve, the poor guy died of parabins. Hold on, Google, what are parabins? Okay? Hold on? Hold on any group of compounds used as preservatives and pharmaceutical cosmetic products. And in the food industry, it's a chemical compound, its chemical Go to bed to preserve it, and you'll see it's it's not preserved. So how are you staying? How are you keeping your avocados preserved? And then and then my deodorant has uh, it's aluminum free. It's you're not supposed to have aluminum in your deodorant. You know. That's the That's the one thing. Here. Here's a little a little tip for your slices, and you don't. You can buy deodorant like regular like speed stick. But if it's called deodorant, it's pure. Okay. Can you may a dollar ninety nine speed stick? You know, not not making any crazy like claims here to buy twenty dollars deodorant. You're you're falling for the color. Hold on, if you buy anti purse print, stop using it right away. You're you're literally and you're really putting fucking chemicals under your arms every fucking day that are neurotransmitter disruptors. That is destroying. Aaron Rodgers, You're destroying You're destroying yourself. I'm telling anti purseprint is the fucking is the devil? Is that why you always have sweat pits, sweatstains under your arms? I use deodorant now charcoal. Deodorant supposed to be very good for you. But it has to say the word where I buy it. It has to say the word deodorant. Even I deodorant means deodor It takes the stink out right. But if it's anti perspiration, that's bad for you. You don't want anti PURSPOSEA want de persperant. Hold on, and by the way, once again, I will clarify I'm not being boogie. You can buy deodorant that is just deodorant, that is just that it has no that is not antiperspirant. Zinc is some people are allergic to zinc. You shouldn't put zinc on your arms if you are so. I look fanto antipersperate without zinc. But you're you're condemning an entire industry that's FDA approved, it's safe. They listen, the FDA approves a lot of shit that they shouldn't. Yes, but they're on the take fifty seven. Oh, they're on the tape. They're on the take from big pharma and big companies FDA FD. I don't look. I don't want to make this kind of part. I'm just saying, a is the Federal Drug Administration right? They don't get you think? Do you think that they're always out for your best interests one out of the time? You don't think that there's other things that that that that they let slip through the cracks. I would I would like to apologize and don't apologize the Joe Rogan podcast. That's that's my feeling, Brodie. I feel that way. I'm gonna say what I feel. You eat the worst ship, piled on top of the second worst ship, and you shove it, you put it, you point a burrito gun in your mouth. Just because you're talking loud, it doesn't mean you're right either. I'm not talking. You have your own opinion. I'm at the same volume you are. But you do everything unhealthy and then you talk about anti persperant. There's no rhyme or reasons. One of those things. One of those things, anti persperant. I've been my entire life. I've stopped. I just haven't put that ship under. But you always have pitstains in photographs on the Morning Show because you don't use anti persperant. I use the odorant, yes, so you don't smell. You still have and the mouthwashed thing. I don't think it's working because of the garlic. But honestly, you are something persperent. Anti persperant is to stop pitstains. Some people don't want pitstains. Listening, There are plenty of safe anti person There's a lot of stuff out there, okay, and you can do your own research. Okay, world. The FDA employees, who are people that grew up in small town America, big town America. Okay, They go to school to be they study science, they go to work at the FDA. They get a job with good benefits, right, right, and then all of a sudden they go, right, this is what this is where the breakroom is, yes, where you clock out, right, this is where you go. This is where HR is, and this is where the gym is on the fourteenth floor. And this is the phone you pick up when you want to be able to take ye right, I'm just saying, big farmer goes hello, Oh is this is this Mike. I'm just saying, sometimes this is b G Farmer. We're calling. Say what you want to say, Make fun of me all you want, Brody. But in my opinion, and this is scary Jones talking right, not medical. This is my opinion that sometimes, yes, these big government agencies, including the FDA and the CDC and others are and who these fucking up whatever, all of them do not have the the the interest of the of the public right thousands of people at all at its core. I doin tones of I'm just I'm saying, that's my opinion. Thousands of people, a lot of tired every week to hire new people. I just think you got to go to them. Why do you want to work here?

00:34:14
Speaker 1: To go?

00:34:14
Speaker 2: Because I want to get bribed. That's why they work. You're an, You're a strung guy, Dan Brody. You're very analytical. Are you saying I'm telling you can't corrupt and entire I'm not. I'm not saying they're corrupt on old ship, but we were told and sold on fucking sugary cereals in the eighties, things that we fucking grew up on. We're now learning sugary cereals were healthy, and those things are approved by our government. We get to eat those things on slices. They're not banned. Scary. Now, you're conflating two things. First, you're saying that people hold on, that people are taking bribes, right, But then I'm not saying that hold on. Then you're saying before the Internet, before HDTV, before cell phones in the seventies, when your kitchen, when your bathroom was built in black and brown yellow, that in the seventies, they lacked the science, right, they didn't realize the long term effects of sugary sodas and whatever. Right, that's not the same as bribing people in you said you you said, pribe. Okay, they're in the pocket of big pharma. Big I think who is big pharma? Scare? I think people go to work, were families will go to again, they're scientists, the biologists. They'm just okay, I'm not going you're you're making this bigger than it is. Okay, I equate. I equated it to ship that we grew up with in the seventies and eighties and things like that. Well, to me, it's like part of this nutritious breakfast. Remember Calvin Crunch that part of what they don't because they shouldn't have been. If cyril was killing us, they wouldn't keep selling it. It is if it's if it's if it's if it's part of if you should have less of it, they say you should have less of it. Absolutely, high fructose corn syrup is syrup is not good. It's right, but it doesn't but immediately, but it's also allowed to exist. Listen, I'm not trying to say get rid of it. It's in everything. It's in everything. So we're here, this is where we are. There are people that said that won't use antipersport now because you told them to, and then they'll smoke three packs a day. There's no there's no rhyme or reason. Pick and choose what you want, but please, here's what I tell I think. I think hyperoscorn syrup is the main reason, and partially hydrogenated blank is the reason for this country. Is most of it's obesity. That's why that that that's okay, that's my invasion. I'll say, come to the Brooklyn boys to laugh. Don't come here for science or medical expertise. That's all I'm saying for either of us. But one of us is rational and uses logic and and and and research, and his name is Scurity Jones. Yeah, okay, okay, Verdi Wow. I just love how you're trying to get me on on words like arabs and you're trying oh and and and you're you're actually making fun of me for putting, you for putting, for using aluminium free products under my arms, and you are making fun of me for it. So I feel attacked, and I feel the need to defend myself. In that case, I'm not making fun of you for that's what you did the last ten minutes. I'm making fun of the reason you use those products right to defend myself, And that's all I'm doing. If you were a vegan and you talked about climate change, and you talked about electric vehicles, and then you said to me, I'm worried about parabins, I would say to you, it's on brand. I would say, I get it. You're that kind of person. You love nature, you don't want to kill animals, you eat You eat broccoli instead of pork. I get it, dude, but you're somebody. Hold on, you're somebody that that doesn't care about pollution. You don't care about the environment. Not true, hold on, you don't care about what food you eat normally. The fact that you care about parabins, to me is hilarious because because doctor per Se told you parabins are bad, You're like, No, I was doing it long before I met that guy. I was not doing But you know what, this world's your tick to? Brody? How is your tick too? Bro Have you used a tick to inhibitor? Because I watched the news and the commercials for set tick too? Did you know si tik to is a tick to inhibitor? Did you know scary that you need your tick too inhibity? What the fuck's a tick too? Yes? Did you know your A one C has to be? Are you worried about your A one c? No? Right, right? You are certainly not worried about anything important, Brody, your tick too? This world is full of hypocrisy. Everyone is a hipocritic. Clow it out. Everyone's a hypocrite. Do you know how many fucking vegans or whoever else is out there will be like super clean whatever, and then on the weekends they go and eat someone's ass. That's what you know in the bedroom. I mean, okay, hold on, Vegans don't eat animals, not because they don't want to eat. No, say like people like you're talking to. This is a parallel. Look at Okay, I'll give you a good, great example. You're saying you like tyrabins, but you eat ass. No, I'm saying people like Taylor Swift save the earth, oh my god, climate change, but she goes around the country on her fucking private jet. I'll answer that. You can answer that. Defend your Bertie's a swifty. Hold on, no, No, there's a checklist dis disclosure. David Brodie's a big swifty his family. I'm gonna let you in on something in case you're not on social media. There is a bad analogy checklist that certain people on one part of the spectrum political spectrum, they go down the checklist. Right if you say Jerry Seinfelder, go oh, he dated a seventeen year old. If you mention most comedians, there's a there's a line for everybody that they disagree with politically. So here's what happened. Taylor Swift asked people to go out and vote. She didn't tell me who to vote for. Where this is nothing to do with I'm getting the oka ahead, And they said, young girls, my fans, you should register to vote. It's important. She didn't tell people who to vote for. Well, people who don't want people to vote or assume that her audience is going to vote Democrat, they come out and they rail against her, and they make shit up and they say things right. So there's one of the catch phrases about Taylor Swift which you just use scary that shows up on a social media all the time, like it's a gotcha, like, oh my god, look what I thought of? Why does Taylor Swift care about the environment? But she flies a private jet. I'll explain. Can tell a Swift go on a on a regular delta flight? Yes, because she can hold on no, no, hold on a minute. If Taylor Swift goes on a regular delta flight, your flight will be delayed an hour. They will be mayhem at the airport, and you will be mad at her for getting on your flight. And don't assume these flights. Don't assume these pory. There's a reason why celebrities also, like every sports team, like every famous person on tour, every single hold On, every sing except maybe Willie Nelson, every single artist flies private because they have to go from town to town. Hold On, scary. They have to go from town to town on a certain schedule that sometimes flights aren't available to so they have to fly private jets so that they can get down. So you've been told, Wow, you've been spoon fed this bullshit, and then you're agreed it's reality. Okay, you could say that all you want. The point, so my whole point was, Okay, there's probably this is all the Mets fly private. The Met's not fly private. They got to do what they gotta do. But they never said that they were cultural. They were they never they're not climate climate change and and and clean activists for a cleaner Earth, and they're wanting, wanting, hold on, wanting and pushing for an entire country and planet to cut down on emissions, which they affected. Hold On, it's not effected by a private jet flying from one town to a nearby other town. So then you know what, Brody, go buy a Tesla. I'm not the one. I'm not buy a first all. I wouldn't buy a Tesla for from many recourse. Not but my next car will be electric because it's a Dodge charger and they're electric now. But you know, I don't have a job and I can't afford an electric car right now. Also, I don't stream about the environment. However, I do believe we have problems with the environment that are man made. Just like, Okay, you know what in the seventies, skirey, you know why we stopped using aerosol cans because they were destroying the Okay, no, no, no, but nobody complained. Then I'm not giving up my aerosol cans, aquinet. They trusted science in the seventies. Hey, listen to me here, Yeah, what this go back to talking about your bathroom. Well, the point is this spiraled out of control because I'm trying to prove a point about hypocrisy, and and that's an hypocrisy. It is hypocrisy. You're calling me a hypocrite because I wanti that you care about. Find it funny for the first quarter, we all do that. We're human. We all do that where we say one thing and we talk out of one side of our mouth here and then we do something else over there. It doesn't matter what the topic is. It doesn't matter what the topic is looking for. We all do it. We all do it. You do it, you do it, We all do it. Scary in every facet of our life. To point out that I use that. I try to be healthy and keep the environment clean if I can, but hold on, hold on, And I don't do drugs or smoke. But yet I eat Chinese food four days a week. Right, you could say that you're a hypocrite. No, I'm someone loves Chinese food, but you But but so, what's wrong with me using certain products? Because I feel like I'm person to talk about parabons, that's all. And that's your opinion. But there's nothing else in your life, nothing that has anything to do with a clean life or a clean environment or anything else but parabons, and and and are you calling that going on? Made me go on a rant and defend myself and defend myself for it, okay, because it happened as a private jet. In all of our life, it happened as a private jet. The president is a private jet. Everyone has private jets, that's life. You would have a private jet. I know for a fact. You flown on private jets. When you didn't have to. So, okay, okay. So I've never been on a private jet, and I'm just saying, don't criticize others with private jets. You put on a lot of I wasn't. I'm just saying. I'm just saying that there are people you're using the analogy the wrong way. The analogy was people say one thing and then they do the opposite. None of you accuse me of that. The initial thing I said, parabin seems like an odd thing for you to care about. That's all. There's a lot of things I don't like, nitrites and nitrates in in my in my pursuit and my salami. But yet you go to Boy hot Dogs because I've got no choice. Sometimes, but sometimes if I want a cleaner wiener, I'm gonna go for an Applegate farm. I'm buying it. You're gonna you're gonna use Giovanni body soap on your cleaner winner, Right. Sometimes I buy things and then you're gonna open the mail and put the dirty mail stuff all over your wiener. Take a look at my cabinets for the like aluminum foil. You should see the stuff I have, all the stuff that's earth friendly in there and going great friendly aluminum foil. Yeah, and I have like the the the is done friendly about regular aluminumfoil? That better environ recycled recycled aluminum foil. It's recycled. It's not Reynolds the way that everybody buys. So I decide to use that. And and in my dishwasher, I use those dishwasher pods. I used the the uh, the earth safe ones, you know, and they're very nice and there's no chemicals. Was not as much chemicals and the other things make Wait a minute, Scary's using earth free soap in his machine and aluminum tin foil, aluminum foil. It's been but yet he flies on private jets. I hate you. I hate you, David Brody. I hate you. Here, hold on, here, hold on, let me let me clean this up. Hold on with a little bit of a breeze podcast. We will be right back. Oh that was hilarious. I guess slices Ion poll if this is your first episode, is not this not this is not us? But Brony fucking wound me up real good today. I just hate the cliches. And it's like all I gotta line, I gotta line I'm gonna use the line. I'm just setting flex to use the line that you read online and someone else used. I'm just saying, I'm just saying, Hey, uh, I was speaking of Whole Foods. I went into the Whole Foods near me to do some Amazon returns. I'm gonna face you pay Whole Foods prices. No, I don't normally, No, I don't. I don't. Okay, here's the thing. I only buy the things in Whole Foods that I can't get anywhere else. So, like, there's a sauce in Whole food It's called Jar. You've had Jar sauce. Jar. No, it's the fucking one of the best sauce I've ever hadden. There's a spicy and irregular and that fent tall thin bottles. Jar sauce terrific. But you can't get anywhere else. There are certain brands that only Whole Foods carry. Now, look, Jar maybe may be available in some supermarket where you guys live, but not near me. I think I don't even know what it's the Whole Foods anyway. The point is I can't get anywhere else, uh, locally, So I returned some stuff my Amazon returns, which they moved. I told you to move the table, and I said, you know what, I'm in the mood tonight for a little cheese. They go, let's see what kind of cheese they have anything on sale? Some of the cheese on sale in Whole Foods. Yeah, absolutely, I already could picture the cheese. I'll go ahead. There's a cheese called Lamb Chopper. It's a strange name, but it's it's like a gerriere. It's I think it's a Spanish che I love it, but okay, it's like the sign was like six dollars off per quarter ounce or something that sounds like a bargain to me. That means, oh my god, how much is it for a quarter rounds? If it's six dollars off, like, it's really expensive anyway. So I'm looking at the cheese and the guy behind the counter, not a cheese expert, he says, uh, oh, I see you looking at the griere. Would you like some greere? Would you like to sample that? So I said, no, I'm quite familiar with griere. I'm a big fan of Swiss cheeses. And he says, oh, no, it's not it's not a Swiss cheese. It's from Switzerland. Wait what, that's not a Swiss cheese, it's from Switzerland. I said, I'm sorry what he said. No, it's not a Swiss cheese, it's from Switzerland. I said, sir, do you know that anything from Switzerland is referred to as being Swiss, like being from America as American? Like I brought Swiss chocolate from Loderac home to my family for Easter. Griere is a cousin of Swiss cheese, but all cheese from Switzerland is Swiss. I think what he thought. You know, he said, I didn't know that Swiss men from Switzerland because Switzerland doesn't have any SSA's in the middle of it. It's not Switzerland, it's Swiss with a tz. He said that to me, He goes, Oh, then shouldn't it be Switzerland? I said to myself, not to him, Sir, you should not be working in the cheese department. He didn't know that he did. He never equated. First of all, he never equated Swiss cheese, the classic Swiss cheese with the holes in it. He never equated that from being from Switzerland. He never equated the word Swiss. Yeah, Switzerland. What like Swiss miss hot chocolate. I brought a package of Swiss miss on my honeymoon. We went to Switzerland on our honeymoon just so I could have Swiss miss in uh Switzer in Switzerland. And I also I also I brought Hawaiian punch to Hawaii. I do stuff like that. I also brought yodels as a picture of me eating yodels in Switzerland. People yodel there, not that they make yodels there. All right, Well, I do fun stuff. You do anyway? Remember the guy last week I said he worked at the restaurant didn't know what a bankhet is. Yeah, he's been outdone by the cheese guy that didn't know that Swiss cheese was from Switzerland. Okay, listen, it happens. It happens sometimes you don't. You don't put two and two together. Oh I mean, I give you one more story of someone not putting too and two together. Yeah, go ahead, Berdie. What are you doing looking at your phone? Uh? Yeah, I got a text about my trip to Amsterdam, But go ahead. I'm sorry. What I'm planning a trip to Amsterdam with my Brooklyn boys. But that what's the name of this podcast. My oh, my other Brooklyn boys, the other Brooklyn boys. Yeah, not you, but it continue. If you had to put your Brooklyn boys on one side of a scale, right, and then like you know, like the Tinatata type scale, Yeah, and then your Brooklyn boys from this podcast on the other side. I have a feeling that the other side would would go down a lot, would just plum it. It would, it would. You're saying that that that would weigh way more. Yeah, I'm saying that you're all the Brooklyn boys, saying that that two of my sixth Brooklyn last going in Indian Matt. Those are my Hoboken friends. Everyone. You've Paul, Darren, all the No, All Ran, Ronnie, who's going Hold on Ronnie? So hold on T shirt guy. Now, let me explain anyone that you've heard on this podcast that we've talked about that I've given a name to, you know, all my friends, Indian Matt and everybody, Jetski, Brian, those are my Hoboken friends. But yeah, but on the on the toilet bowl, Brian is Brooklyn friend. He's toilet Brian is a Brooklyn friend and bold freak Ronnie also a Brooklyn friend. So what about what about Danny Connections. No's about what about T shirt guy T Shirt? Who the day is online of t shirts? Oh? Jay j Ernest, Yeah he's from Brooklyn. Yeah. But my my core Brooklyn friends are people that I met in the seventh grade, in middle school and even beyond a first grade. I have Paul and Anthony I know since the first grade. These guys I don't really talk about them on the podcast because they never really come up. Those are the guys that go by dude and dute do dude right. They're all married with kids in other cities. They Paul lives in Boston. Anthony they're married and their kids live in other cities. No, they're married with kids and these they live in other cities with their families and in Boston and Pennsylvania. And my boy Jay smaller Jay's from Brooklyn. He still lives in Brooklyn and baldfreek Grownnie. That's the crewe and Lloyd and the six to five six of us are crew. We still are. We know each other since uh first grade even most mostly since middle school. All of us since the seventh grade at least, so we were going we go on trips. So this year we're going to you know you we do the baseball stadium tour. I've talked about that every year we go with different baseball How you're going to red light districts tours, Well, we're going to Amsterdam and uh but for the record, I played the Van Halen song Amsterdam in Amsterdam. You did that? I did? Yes, I did our so because for alternatives, I one more. I played the spinal tap song Stonehenge when I was at Stonehenge. That's fucking awesome. I think that one tops all of them. Thank you very much. Well, well, it's eleven inches. It's supposed to be eleven feet. I will say so. Because we're all turning fifty this year. Because we're all in the same grade, we only met each other, we're having a little problem here. Well, we're going to we're going to We're going to Amsterdam and as part of our fiftieth birthday trip, they're going on to Prague after one of my all time favorite cities, Prague, Amsterdam, Amsterdam. My daughter'll be in Prague next week. Well, I'm not going to Prague because I don't have that kind of time that they have. But I'm going to Amsterdam with them, and we're trying to plan activities and things to do. Now me, I've never none of us have been to Amsterdam. So when you think Amsterdam, you think a lot of weed smoking, which used to be a big deal because it was illegal everywhere, right, But now it's it's legal in so many places, it's not a big deal anymore. Think of the You think of the red light district, right, which is like the old school with its sex in the windows when you walk. So women are in these windows and they put the red light on. That means they're available for sale. And apparently it's legal over there, right, all that stuff, But apparently that's just a part of their history that's not really like, I don't know about I have naked ladies dancing on the one street. I like the red light district, right, I know you have the Anne Frank House, which you probably won't go to. Well, hold on, that's part of the story here. So the red light district, yeah, something you want to just see. You go down the street, you take some pictures, right, I guess, I don't know. I don't know how you do not take pictures. They beat your brains in, Okay, you don't take pictures. Uh did they not take pictures? Okay, but it's no. But you know a lot of people do because it's on the canal and by the way, now, something that's visual at this point, it's just something you're looking at, like like you're looking at a piece of history. Right. But here's the thing. People don't actually say I want her and they take her out of the window. Right, that's no, No, you actually they like they buzz the door open and you go in and you focus people in the window. No, that's that's not where we're going with this, because that's not that's not what happens, all right. Well, anyway, the point is you can't take pictures what people but because hold on, there's a canal in the middle of the street, and you walk on both sides of the canal and his bridges every you know, a couple of hundred feet. They go up on the bridges and take pictures at each other, like, oh, let me take your picture on the bridge, But actually I'm taking pictures of the red light district. Right, Okay, we'll be clever about it. Okay, that's cool. I guess I'll work around. But the point is here we want to see what they're known for, right, and that is what they're known for. And the Ant Frank House tru foffles well, Jason said to me today, up the thread, the thread is going, the chat, the group chat's active here. He's not gonna want to ride a bike. Jason informs all of us and Frank House is sold out? Do we have a hookup? So now I'm looking for Parry Jones from Elvis Durant. Can I get it to the I can't get it to the Ant Frank House for the entire time that we're there. The fucking Aunt Frank House is sold out. So I'm like, how is it sold out? They're like, apparently they can only let a few a certain amount of people as the most popular attraction. Yeah, if you don't know Diary Van Frank, she was, she was taken from that house. She did that. She wrote her diary, the Diary in that house, famous house. I want to go say it now. I can't get in. You cannot deny any entry. So I need a guy. Does anyone know a guy in Amsterdam that can hook me and my friends up with with the Anne Frank House tour. I find it kind of funny but here I am talking begging to get into an attraction. The only reason that house is famous is it used to be very easy to get into, right because they broke into the house. They broke into the house and she got kidnapped from her house, right, well, taken and taken it.

00:55:37
Speaker 1: Right.

00:55:38
Speaker 2: So I want to see this place because it's got a lot of history here. So this is like a thing. So now I can't fucking get in. And you know what they did book in its place? They booked a boat ride. No, they're having the National Tulip Festival is going on. Oh, the Holland tulips. That's awesome. So we're going to go tiptoe through the tulips. No, we're going to take rent bikes by the just realized. But whether you go to the Red Light District or the flower thing, you're gonna see two lips. Thank you, that would need a little space. Hold on. Here's here's what I'll say to you. As as as a Jewish person, the An Frank House has a lot more significance when you when you see the etchings on the wall and you understand what the what it was like to hide a family behind the walls, what it was like to live in fear of being discovered. I'm not saying it's not a good place to go for everyone. I'm saying it's a little more difficult and important to see when you had family live through that, and you had ancestors live through that. And so as much as i'd say I'm sorry you're not going, and I'd like you to get a hook up and a velvet rope opened up for you, I don't think it's gonna have the impact on you. I mean it might, but you're you're not You're not the impacted type, which I say is at the same time, I'm a tourist who wants to see the attractions and the important things because they're important for a reason. So so yeah, so we we did. We did want to go. Go. I'm saying you should go. I'm saying if you don't get to And by the way, the tickets are non refundable. And so what we found when we went, my wife and I went on when we went on the trip to Iceland with the Morning Show and we ended up in Amsterdam, is because you can't refund the tickets, there are people outside that will sell you the sell tickets outside. All right, so like if they have to cancel, you might be able to go. The only thing is the ticket. The tours are like every fifteen minutes, so you know, whenever you go there may or may not be people selling tickets. All right, Well, all hope is not lost. We're going to try and you know, you know there's a stub hub there. You know, someone's selling them on the black market. Guaranteed you'll check it out. Check it out. I've got tickets to entering. Check it out. Yeah, you'll see that. Yeah. Well that when I went to Paris, me and Robin, we were like Robin and I. Yep. We we got to the Louver and the line to get in was an hour long, and we had someone off to the side, like, dude, private tours of the Louver right here, right here, all the private tour guy. Scam. No, not a scam. The woman took us. She knew people. It's all that's a scamboni. The scamboni is there inhot they're in cohoutes with the security guards because they're on the take. So this is right. So we got charged crazy money to get to the louver. This woman she took Robin and I through the louver. We cut the fucking line. People were giving us dirty looks. I'm like, what the And I said, where are we going? And the woman was like, we got this, don't worry, We're gonna go on this line right here. I'm like, this is not even a line. And we went right to the front. They nodded at her, she nodded at them. They they swiped our tickets and we went in and she showed us the louver. It was like the Loover for dummies. It was like the cliff Notes Lube Lube Loove, the cliff notes loom hold on. Because we went she showed us all the important ship and I'm like, well, this is great because you know most of those guys the private tours. I remember we went on some tour we were on. Was it a party plane? Was one of We're on a cruise. I forget where it was, you know, And and the cars are all parked off the side of the ship. Like we'll give you I'm a local, I'll give you a private tour and you take the print and take you to one of the finest restaurants on the beach. Right, So they take you, they drive you around like where anyone could drive you, and they take it like a shack on the beach where they know everybody. They're hey right, because they're all in on it. They bring a call load of people to a shack where you eat terrible conk fish. Everyone's on the tank, they're getting kicked backed. Everyone tours. No, dude, it saved me so much time that do you kidding me? The whole day you got lucky. But most of these like, oh, a whole car load for forty if you if you take the professional one, it's it's thirty dollars, apiece, I'll save you money. And then they take you to a to a ship place. Dude. When I showed up at the tour in Naples and we wanted to go into the Blue Grotto, a guy and Italian guys like, yo, I got you, I got you over here, well in his Italian accent, not that that's a Brooklyn the Giant anyway, it man. So we jumped, we jumped into his boat. He says, I know everybody, we got the you, we got the we get the So we took the speedboat all the way to the gondolas. He transferred me into a gondola with a guy who knew everybody. We he fucking rode so fast up to the Blue Grotto and they were all screaming Italians cursing at him, being like and he cut the line. He cut the fucking line that got my gondola guy in kahoots with my speed with my speedboat guy cut the fucking line. There was like an hour wait to get into the grotto where people are like like up and down on these rickety boats, like we're getting Sea six sitting there in the middle of nowhere, and he's he's crushing it. This guy cut through the fucking lane. Man. I couldn't believe it. I'm like, are you okay, We're gonna get it just bad And the guy goes the paper, don't worry about it. Yeah, we cut off everybody, dude. We were in and out of the grotto in about fucking fifteen minutes. I couldn't believe it. And I was back on in the speedboat with my speedboat guy. I paid. Did I pay a lot of money for it? Yes? Oh see, that's the thing. But I'm a mago. Hold on, I'm a man of convenience, Yes you are. I got through I got it. I got from the port in Naples to the grotto, in the grotto, my pictures, out of the grotto, and back to the poor in Naples within an hour. No one does that. I need a gondola guy at Disney. I need someone at Disney World to be like, you know, I know a guy. Give me seven bucks. I'll get it in front. Right. If I get like, cut the line at Space Mountain every time, Hello, I would do it fast track fast pass. It's no different, Brody, it's no different. Pay pay for the convenience. You're on vacation for the fast track. The problem with fast track is you can only do one per hour. Yeah, and you have to come back at a certain time. That's Disney. Yeah. I went once when I was I don't know, I was eighteen or nineteen seventeen, eighteen or nineteen something like that, and I had gone with my uh with some friends and my parents and their friends whatever. But it rained that day and the forecast was rain all day, and we went anyway, and there was no one online. And they've redone Space Mountains since then. But you used to be able to get on Space Mountain, get off, walk through the tunnel area and go right to the other side and get on again, like it was a much shorter way to go on. So we went on like fifteen times in a row. Loop bloop blop blop bloop. Can't do that anymore, they ruined everything. Well, but you gotta go, Like, but the fast past is one an hour? Yeah, soddly were I want a guy to go. I got a space mountain hook up. I got a hook up. Come with me through this doorway. I'll get you in through the pack. I know for a fact that there are Disney VIP excursions that you could pay through the fucking nose for. Yes, are the kind of people that sit behind home plate. Yes, though you can get in and out of the park and get past everything. Yes, you also get the underground tour. Yeah, you get to see all the all thes, see everything. I hear. It's fucking bookoo bucks though it's crazy, it's so bookoo boo. She's scared, can't afford So anyway, my headline here is I'm going to Amsterdam to ride a bicycle through the tulips. I can't believe this is what my vacation. I can't believe you're riding a bicycle, you're gonna try to get a motorized one, you know it. Of course, I think when you go to Amsterdam. First of all, the bikes fly around like maniacs, but they know what they're doing. The cars we've in and out of the bikes. The bikes, we've in and out of the cars. When you're in the car, you think you're gonna hit a bike all the time, you don't. And all the cars are like little stubby smart cars yep. Because the parking spaces are all like pull in diagonal, like a side street, but like in a mall while you pull in, because the cars are like eleven feet long. It's a beautiful town, Oh my god, the most beautiful town I've ever been in. Right for New York City, by the way. I can't wait. I am. I'm excited for Amsterdam. And I don't even know what I was talking about that you interrupted you with answer, that's that's the question. There was there was something that you were talking about, and then you started interrogating me about why you weren't invited to Amsterdam, because no, I don't I know. It's my real Brooklyn boys are coming to me, coming to Amsterdam movie. See that's not called for, that's not and that's nice. Just ahead of that, I'm kicking off my uh for the first three nights, I'm going to Marbella, which is the south of Spain, which is not my Orca, but it's another island. Very nice. Yeah, So I'm gonna be seeing told Darren there, told Darren his his head gonna be above the crowd at your spot. He's bought, he's got told Darren has a house there and he's inviting me to it for three nights. I'm like, fun, rent free, fuck that, you're gonna have sex in his bed with Robin? You know what? I may return the fit even that ship out? Well, well, well, o man, how time flies? Uh? You had something stuff if you wanted to get off your chest, brody, do you remember what they were? Well, let me tell you about a couple of people on TikTok. You know, in the four you page, you scroll and there's people doing lives and times you just stop on the live. So I stopped on on this. Uh. This one one guy, he was singing it's a song by twenty one Savage, I guess, and he's like red Rum, red Rum, red Rum, red Rum, Yeah, I've never heard the song. So he's like, he's singing red Rom over and over again. He's like, I love this song. I don't even know what the hell it means, but I'm loving it. You know where the word red rum comes from. Scary that I have. It comes from a horror film red rum, which is murder, murder backwards. That's just from the Shining with Jack Nichols. Shine they look in the mirror and they say red rum three times backwards. No, no, it's not the bloody merry thing. Bloody red rum is written on the wall, oh red. When they see it in a mirror, they realize that he's writing murder and blood. But this person is singing the song and like, I don't even know what the song means. And then in all the comments in the live, we like it means murder, dumb ass. Well you not know what red rum means. And by the way, that's not me calling people who don't know that a dumb ass. I'm just like, you're singing the song, you're thinking, like, well, I wonder what red rum is anyway. So I kept scrolling and I find this girl is she's drinking I don't. It looks like she's drinking some kind of coffee drink or a tea drink, right, And I stopped and I'm I'm listening to what she's saying. And she's like, oh, I love Macha much. Is my favorite? Is it cough for your t Do anybody know? Mancha? It's not you scary? That's what she said. Wow, it's her favorite drink. It's her favorite, but doesn't know if it's called for your tea? I could see that. Really. I mean, it's a tea, isn't it. Guess? Okay, what about cambucha? Was that a tea? I don't know what cambuch is. I just know it's a it's a one of those things that vegans drink. So all right, So she didn't she didn't know. She didn't know, but she didn't know what. I just found an odd that it's your favorite drink but you don't know if it's a coffee. It's okay. Now, listen, A group could be your favorite group, but you don't know their music. That who has a favorite group and doesn't know that music? Everyone who calls into the morning show, Oh no, no, that's called it their favorite song. But they don't know who the band is. What you mean, all right? If I tell you my favorite band is Kiss, I know the songs, that's that's what nothing, that's what you meant. Well, the favorite No, some people don't know. They just know the hits and they don't know. They don't know their deep catal. You said it's their favorite band. They don't their favorite group. I mean their favorite songs. They don't know the artist is what you probably? No, I meant what I said? What I say? Do you think they called? They go, oh my god, I love Harry Styles. I just don't know any of the songs. Well, they know that they know Watermelon Sugar and as it was and uh, the stuff he did were one direction. The hits and that's it. There are people out there that will say they like claim to be listen. I said, I love Taylor Swift. I went to the concert you did. I didn't know half the music. I knew the fan You're not a favor but tell us what this is your favorite artist? You said, there are people who they don't know the songs of their favorite artist. Well, because people you throw that term around like very cat like. No, what they turned what they tell you the trasual did term people throw around? I mean, number one fan? How could you possibly be right? And how would you know if you were? You weren't give a peep what I'm what I'm what I'm getting. You're your biggest fan. No, you're probably not. Like everyone call sports radio stations. I'm a diehard Mets fan, right, No, everyone's a diet You can't all the players. I can't. No, it's not that they go I'm a diehard fan. I am a diehard fan, But I don't know if everybody's a diehard fan. That's the whole point of being a fan. Like, nobody calls a radio station to go, I'm sort of a fan. That's what I'm Well, that's my analogy. That's my favorite group, that's my favorite band. But but I mean, you probably don't know. Some people don't know everything from a group. Well, some people change favorite bands every hit, like every every two months, they got a new favorite. Yeah, all right, Speaking of favorites, there's I'm not gonna say which one it is, but there's a couple of Facebook pages that are New Jersey facebook pages for pizza and you post on it if you love, if you stop, you post pictures of the pizza you had, and like, oh, I just stopped off it at Tony's on thirteenth Street down the Shore. And then they put a picture up and then everybody makes fun of it. They'll rip it. The crust looks like shit, that looks look terrible, or some people go that's the best place in the Jersey Shore or the everyone gives their opinion. Usually if it's a bad slice of pizza, they rip it. So somebody posted a picture and the pizza scary. It was like six inches of crust, like the sauce and cheese didn't come anywhere near the edges. It looked like chuck bad chuck e cheese pizza. It looked like bad frozen pizza. So people were like, you know what birthday party was that pizza from? And it's from a place in South Jersey or the Jersey Shore area, and I don't I don't never heard of the place. I don't live on the Jersey Shore. I don't go down there very often. So I said, just to say how bad it looked. I said, how fast was the conveyor belt that thing was made on? Because conveyor belt pizza is like Domino's shit awful. So the the actual business. The owner of the business replies to me and says, it's one mile faster than your mother. I love it. I don't know what that means, exactly right, faster than your mother, So I said, So, I said, maybe spend more time I'm instead of insulting people making better looking pizza. Wow. And then he went on and then he said, we've been in business since nineteen blah and people love off pizza. Yeah, but you can't really talk because you haven't been to the mecca of pizza New Havevien scary? Hold On, I have a beer I'm going to send you right now. Hold On, I'm gonna send you a picture of this pizza right now, and you tell me. I could tell by looking, Yeah, just by looking. You tell me what this pizza looks like, and whether or not I should call this person, this company. I want them to do that. I'm not gonna call them out. I'll give on a scale of one to ten. And also tell me if you think it was cooked on a conveyor belt. You look at that pizza, you tell me that's Jersey Shaw's best pizza. People love it. They've been in business for seventy years. Look at that pizza. I'm gonna post a picture of this pizza with no name on Instagram, and you tell me it looks like good pizza. Ah, it looks Okay, Okay, it looks it does. Yeah, it does look like conveyor belt pizza, thank you. But does that crust look like you get it in high school? That's okay. The crust is what's really throwing me here because I'm trying to zoom in on the crust. Look at the slice on the top, the top slice, it's missing cheese and it looks like it's missing like Pennsylvania of cheese. It looks Pennsylvania. Yeah, the cheese Montana, that's Montana cheese is missing, Like could just spare some fucking cheese. Like sauce. There's nothing, no sauce. Yeah, it's a visual. It's a little it's a little chinzy, but chi CHINZYI chincy. I could see though if when you look at that and think I gotta drive thirty minutes an hour and a half to the Jersey Show or whatever to get that pizza, And am I wrong to say it looks like it was on a conveyor belt. You're not wrong. It doesn't look it doesn't, but it's it is all in the taste and the text. How about that the the pizza place goes back is like what if you get down there and you pick up the slice and then you you bite into it and you get that that crispy, crunchy crust that we love, and then the sauce is nice and sweet. What little sauce is on that block of bread may be delicious, It may be the cheese may be the freshest hand shredded mozzarella cheese ever put on pizza. But the picture it looks like shit. The picture does make it, But imagine that the owner is so petty, he's coming on in Sultan like your mother, your mother. It does not look like there's a lot of ingredients on there. I mean, it looks like bread. Bread. Somebody saw sauce and just cheese. The cheese fell a little bit, the chinzy cheese, chintzy cheese. I'm gonna post that on Instagram. But doesn't they look like any more love went into that? Now, maybe they take hours to make their sauce brody. Maybe there's things in their sauce that are great. Maybe we'll put the sauce on the pizza then, but there's no other there's clearly no other ingredients on there. It's it's a Simpletons slice for sure. My point is the fact that they had to defend themselves on a pizza fan page on Facebook and go after people for putting the pizza down. By the way, I never heard of this place. Yeah, he attacked every single person. Why don't you ask the slices. Let's give the name. Let's throw it out there, because this guy could be like a hit man. I don't want him come to kill me. Where's no Oh, I see where it is. By the way, Google rating four point two. It's not great pizza. We'll pull up yelping to average it best. I know you hate yel pull up the elp review. Well wait a second, note, I'll say this. I'll say this. Yeah, if you look at the actual building and the place that it's it looks it looks like a it looks like one of those places that have been there for like eighty years, Like, oh my god, it's gotta be okay. If I was okay, I'll give them this. If I was driving by this place in said city, at the Jersey Shore, which I've never seen before, because I maybe I'll get And by the way, it's not a pizza place. It's a place of grill in the name Yeap, and it's got spaghetti in there and other things. Anyway, if I passed by it, I would be compelled to try it, just because of the storefront. It looks it looks old school. It looks like an old school died that's been weathered through the war and it's been there, looks like it's been this the fifte like. Okay, so it's not on Yelp, but nobody on yelp procute it or they must have demanded they get their reviews taken. I'll tell you this, it's got a four point two with two thousand reviews. So what that tells me is it's been there forever. Yea four point two is one of those things that are in my mind, Oh that's overrated. Or if it's a place that's going there, go to the bad reviews and tell me what. Give me one bad review. Go to lowest and tell me what it says. Are you there? Are you there? Margaret? It's me, no? Are you no? That's the Diary Van Frank No, no, the lowest go to the lowest rated pizza. Terrible size, large pizza, more like personal pant Okay, they arguing over that. How does a pizza place entirely forget about putting pizza sauce on an entire pizza? Thank you? Thank you? Want to find out this place is for you. This is the place for you. If you're looking for the saddest and most driest pizza you've ever had in your life, look no further. This is your place. Literally the worst pizza I've ever had in my life. Dry, disgusting, unedible, dry price trash. Just order Dominoes or Papa John, save yourself money. Pizza like this shouldn't exist in New Jersey. Ilios might be equal in quality and taste. You should be embarrassed, shouldn't even be in business. Gross I should have drawn I should have got pizzaware on conveyor belts. Gross I should have bought frozen pizza, no salt. This is this terrible service, all right, here's what the owner in this place is an embarrassment to the term Italian food. It was absolutely flavorless. I could also taste uh wait, all I could taste was canned tomatoes and pasta. Didn't even have the common decency to send parmesan salt or whatever. Anyway, here's my problem with a place like this. It happens to be in a popular city on a very popular street because I know the street, so it's probably living off of its visibility and people going there. And it's got the old signs and it's been there and it's been there for so you know what, you get a gold stall on. You get a gold star for you and your family for being in business all these years. I'm sure you're an upstanding, cool family, but your product is not great. It's subpar. And and the four point two with the two thousand reviews on Google tells me that I told you that in the previous episode a four point five and above with two thousand reviews, I would go there sight unseen, and I probably it's probably a better product. It's a good case. So this person wrote, I bought a pepperoni pizza, butterfly shrimp, and an Italian wrap blah blah from this place. The pizza was dry, flat, sauceless and tasteless. Here it is the important part. The shrimp were fried so hard that you could only taste the fried hard breading. First of all, don't put fried shrimp on a pizza. Okay. So then so she writes other shit. Right, here's the owner commenting, we can understand you are upset. Sometimes we do overcook the shrimp. Now, anything after that, we would have remade it. We would have done it. But sometimes we overcooked that. That's an admission that your shit is subpar. Yeah, here's an idea. Don't overcook the shrimp. You know you overcook it, so don't overcook it. Yeah, sometimes we burn the shit that we're charging you for on your pizza. But let us know next time you can wait another hour for your pizza to be made, and this time we won't burn the shrimp. My mother, My mother cant run. You'll convey about them you were alive today. By the way, I can name three pizza spots in that same city that are better than that, and I just off the top of my head, but I'm not gonna do One of them doesn't even sell pizza. Yeah, but anyway, you know what, Google ratings have Google ratings to the rescue again. Man, I'm telling you, Google ratings is the truth. As long you know it's over five hundred reviews. You know what it says here two stars. Their pizza had parabins in it. Go fuck yourself, Dad, you're a real douchebag. Do reflect on your thoughts and your comments. I'm fisting what that means. Boys, boys,